Good one Rabbit ... you just take care of yourself in amongst all this trauma - it's easy to be sucked in but if you fall down the rabbit hole, you could be starting from scratch again. Sorry, don't mean to sound disparaging just realistic and watching out for you (and the ??inevitable?? pullback).
Glad that puss is doing OK but how scary with the anaesthetic scenario. Looking forward to hearing that she is home and all fixed up - though slightly worse for wear and maybe minus 1 of her 9.
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Well Babycakes is feeling a tad sorry for her old self but is having a good run round this morning before I go off for my riding course.
Carpet picnic went well, there was probably a bit lacking in confidence that Mr Rabbit wouldnt think the whole thing was a tad barmy, but after I had explained what the initial plan had been before babycakes committed "hari kari" was that I knew he had to get up early and I thought it would be nice to just relax and get an early night, instead it all went a bit pearshaped! He said he should have bought his digital radio and I added I was going to ask you too if you had contacted me, but you did but I just didnt see it.
We lay on the rugs in front of the fire, autumn has kicked in here with a passion, it was freezing last night and the new skinny rabbit is feeling the cold much more. We had a very nice conversation with a lot of honesty of him, which I shall digest and journal on sun/mon. Still no ILY but more ML or should I say LM believe me its even nicer knowing that "flora the floosie" doesnt exist and Mr Rabbit did enjoy teasing me that I had thought he would do such a thing. I was given a kiss before he left "the big bed" as Dia calls it, and he asked me to phone him this evening to check on him and babycakes, I told him it would be about sevenish and he replied "no worries I will be here" He then said "and I will see you some time soon" I calmly replied "so you will go back tomorrow afternoon" and got asked what time I'd be back and he said well maybe I will see you!
Anyway shower is beckoning, things are going very very slowly in the right direction perhaps my hopes of a Xmas with Mr Rabbit may pan out who knows..
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Back home again, managed to come home a bit earlier as my friend and I went first and did a polite excuse me! By the time I arrived having got stuck in the traffic a bit I was a bit fractious, but managed to come in and go get tidy up and make myself presentable, whilst H was packing his bag to leave, it was all getting a bit too much and it was hard to keep tears at bay, but I enjoyed the tea he had made me, and settled beside him for a cuddle, he kept saying how tired he was and how he must go, and I managed to suggest that he didnt have to do anything and now he is staying and going to work in the morning!
He is funny he keeps doing a tiny bit of schoolboy/mlc/back off stuff then tries to pretend he has a more logical alternative, basically trying to show he has control when he really wants to do what he knows I want to do, its actually quite sweet.
So much to analyse and so much he keeps saying, will try and journal it all tomorrow, but two key things were when I mention that he was so much quicker to divorce people in some countries all you had to do was agree you hated each other, he replied "oh well we wont be divorce as we will always be friends" Then this afternoon, telly programme was suggesting a "trial seperation" and I went "oh were not having that" and turned it over" he smiled and said "why is it all the telly programmes are having a trial seperation" I sorta had a dig and said "well ours isnt exactly trial" and he pointed out that as we are seeing each other were not really "separated" So maybe he is changing his thought patterns, but I know I cant push in anyway I just have to "let him come to momma" lol!
Anyway just having a quick squizz around and will chat tomorrow!
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Well firstly Babycakes is fine, gobby but fine, she still cant steer her bucket on her head properly but is getting about the house ok.
Riding weekend was fab, no real horse to ride but a very smarty pants mechanical one, he measures weight distribution, back/front/side left. All my lower body position was pretty good still and as it was only dramatically repositioned six months ago Im really pleased with that. I had started engaged lower abs so spent a lot of time practising stacking my abs on top of each other to give better support, its sounds all very technical but B manages to make it sound practical and therefore the imagery you take home is invaluable. Also we had a girlie night out in the pub having dinner and a good few glasses of wine! And a good chat with my chum in the car there and back.
When H had kissed me goodbye sat morning he had said he might be here if I wasnt going to be too late, so honour bound I felt it would look good to make the effort to come home when I could and not push the GAL too much but show him how important he was that I would occasionally curtail riding GAL to be with him. When I got home S had slung his car blocking the drive and I had to park over the cul-du-sac and lug my saddle and bag indoors. I had just been held up on the road and was feeling the frustration of being tired, in pain (back), worry about babycakes, and when I got in was greeted my S's frustration at something he wanted to do and couldnt, and H apparently packing! Well dont ask me how, but I managed to breathe, went out to move car onto drive when S was leaving, validate S and say hello to S's GF who I hadnt seen cos of his blacked out windows, then come back in, H was making a cuppa, so I thought regroup, breathe and asked for time to refreshen myself, H looked guilty as he had just emptied the hotwater tank to fix a problem and he was expecting a fuse blow from me, but as I hadnt been near a proper horse, I just mentioned a wash and change was all I needed.
So fresh and attractive I enjoyed my cuppa and was encouraged to sit beside H, he was so obviously tired, and brain frazzled too, he has planned an early night saturday, but S & GF had come over with food to cook and he felt he had to make conversation although he fell asleep on them, he also bruises so easily and had several nasty burns on his arm from the train. It was obvious he didnt want to drive home/go as he kept saying "he ought to" I knew he wanted me to say "its ok stay" but knew if I phrased it wrongly it would create a cut and run moment. So I stated that he didnt have to do anything and could chose to stay and save him the long journey past work only to return in the morning, and he took it with a smile and agreed saying it was sensible to save fuel, but you could see he was grateful for the lifeline I had thrown him.
We cuddle watching a very old James Bond film and at one point I went to the bathroom and check on Babycakes, and when I came back he had his laptop with FB open, he started to close the laptop lid and I said no its ok carrying on if you want, but he said no come back here and have a cuddle its not important. We cooked tea and watched more telly cuddle and I remarked that we it was good to cuddle and that and kisses were one good thing we needed to do more off, something that had seriously got lost along the way. I nodded off a bit so he lifted my legs up and moved settee's and used his laptop again, and again on FB but there was no serious closing up the page when I woke, but maybe thats now because he doesnt feel he has to hide anything, ironic there wasnt anything to hide lol.
We slept in the big bed, isnt it ironic we hadnt slept and I mean sleep in over six months and now he even changed his sentence midway when he went to say MY bed (not his), he said the main bed, still cant quite call it OUR bed. But I woke early and went to put hot water on, as Ive changed it since he left, when I jumped back in, he held my hand and said he'd been asleep since two, interesting his insominia hasnt stopped because he removed me out of his problem! So I mentioned perhaps he should try my tablets, and commented that I only take them to sleep now not so much for the other thing (anxiety) although I may take them for both this evening intimating that it would be hard losing him again, and he replied, "no need for that"
On leaving he kissed me and said he would maybe pop back wednesday, and then said he'd phone thurs, and without realising said no wed wont you want to know about Babycakes visit to the vet, so I then twigged he had ment visiting wed week, he will have finished his contract then so no need to be anywhere, so I hugged him and said it would be very nice.. Not so much a worry as I have heaps to do with some events on madam in the next two weeks..
Anyway enough waffle, just needed to get thoughts on paper, what with Babycakes, WAS coming home, stacking my abs, madam to ride and get ready for event on sunday, Im exhausted and its not even mon pm..
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Sounds perfect Rabbit ... you are making some whacking great inroads.
Your weekend sounds fun - though I was picturing the mechanical bull and not the horse, when you were describing your lesson! How things move on, eh? Technology - a wonderful invention. D'ya reckon there's some percentage in making a mechanical H before we agree to marrying them? [er hum, patent is mine, thank you]!
Glad that Babycakes is doing OK - suggestion: Sat Nav for the bucket, maybe?!! Aren't they funny when they look like they have the radar afront?!! Sounds like she is doing equally as well as you are.
I'm quite sure of this situation being a successful outcome. Look how far you have come so quickly - and I note that you are now coaching others too!
So excited for you Rabbit ... keep up the slow and steady - I know that you must be bursting right now but shorten the stirrups and pull in the reigns for the next round.
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Well if we can make an H that looks like Will Smith in the shower scene of I Robot, then Im taking 50/50 missus!
Like the analogy of shorter reins and stirrups, as Im sure he is gonna get jumpy at some point and Im gonna need better balance to ride the jumps!
You joke about the bull but at Badminton they had a mechanical horse that was teaching people to fall properly onto to crash mats, it suddenly stopped dead, dropped a shoulder and hey presto deposited the rider on the crash mat.
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W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Glad Babycakes is ok.