Thanks Cas - it's great when the old buddies drop by too!!
I am riding the waves and I so hope that the job comes off ... it's only a short term cover until December but it may give me all that I need - that 'purpose' that you so rightly speak of. Just having a daytime routine and the fact that it will end these hideously long and lonely days. Yeah, will defo come visiting - maybe even with a view to moving interstate if things don't work out here - a new life indeed!
Glad that you got some medicine. Be careful now that you don't burn on the hot water!! It may make you cough a little more initially as the heat of the water opens up your chest/airways and any muck will be forced out ... this is good!! I hope that it does the trick anyhow.
Sounds like you have had a good day otherwise. What book did you get - I hope that it was non DB related so that you can have some alternate distraction?!
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Nell, it's a chicky type novel that I picked up on the discount table at Borders. I bought it as an easy read for hospital but didn't get to it so thought I could enjoy it now...easy read with no effort needed on my part. I often find easy reads then open the door for me to read something a little more serious.
Yes, I certainly think interstate there would be greater job opportunities. Try before you buy! Btw, what made you and H choose Perth if you don't mind me asking? It's a beautiful place but so remote. I haven't been there for a long time but I though it was beautiful when we went there.
I think my neighbours have noticed but no ones been brave enough to ask me yet! althought the PITA that lives next door ask my son if I was ok and he told her "H was just working hard" but I cant hide behind that for much longer. Keeping everything crossed that your H puts the rest of the money in early next week, I know how you feel about H not being normal, Im in the same boat, my heart tells me that my H is a kind and honourable man, but my brain keeps reminding me if he was kind and honourable we wouldnt be separated and him only phoning once a week. Hope you get some studying done Nell, probably best to make sure everything is ready for working Tuesday incase you get a call. Will pop by later x
____________________________
W 47 H 47 M 24 T 30
Once lost but now found and happily married again!
Perhaps that's what I will get at the library next week - chick novel to just get some humour (and maybe perspective)!! Hope that you enjoy yours. Sometimes, you just need something other than all this heavy reality that we have locked ourselves in to, eh?
Perth was never on the plan .. we were headed to Palm Cove/Cairns where we spent our 10th WA - idyllic - especially out on Heron & Wilson Islands where we had 10 glorious nights. Our migration agent suggested coming over here to have a look and we liked it .. thought that it might also be easier in terms of acclimatising to the weather, so here we are! H has been encouraging me lately to look at interstate (I think because he now accepts my struggle with work) but I told him that if he thinks that I am making this any easier than it currently is on him, he needs to think again! I am not leaving my home until the last minute that I can legally get away with it. Then I have a lot of choices to make ...
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
I've considered those words Cas. I even have a note on my fridge notice board which says "book flights for April" - hoping that next time H visits, he will ask me about it. This reminds me that I have choices too and I CAN go home and file, which will make things awkward and disadvantage him, in his own words.
Brave move though - and I don't think that H is anywhere near making that choice ... I think that he feels that he is done and if I agree, that would make the rest of his life PERFECT!
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Morning Rabbit. What's a PITA - sorry, don't know that one?!
I don't think that you have to tell people until you are ready. I was considering what I would tell my neighbour, if she asked, as she was walking by the other day. I don't know if they have noticed or not but it would seem most likely as his car is never here now and he did bring that big removal truck a few weekends ago .. couldn't have missed that!
Thanks for your support on other matters. It helps to have your feelings validated, even when you know that you are out of whack yourself! Good advice to be ready, incase I get the call to work on Tuesday. That's something else I can prepare tomorrow.
We have had hail stones here today. Poor little Cat6 has been holed up all day and now she's sitting here with me - the sun is streaming through the blinds but I think that she is loathe to leave me to go out on her ritual evening wander.
I'll see how I go tomorrow but plan a beachy walk in the morning and then studying when I get back. I am determined not to sit in the house all day again. It's Fathers Day here tomorrow though, which means that it could be dead quiet out and about - or bedlam!
Catch you later ((hugs))
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
Ha, our last holiday as a couple was at Palm Cove.
I undertsand what you are saying about hanging on in the house until the last minute but I also think that there is something to gain from moving out which must help moving on. I am still the family home and for logistical reasons I will probably stay for another 2 years and then I'm going to find a place for me. Not sure where that will be but it will reflect my needs and not our needs which is what this house does. I like this house and i feel safe here but it's not really 'my place'
btw my neighbours have never said a word about H leaving but I'm more than certain it's been discussed but just not with me present!
Palm Cove ... beautiful. You know, Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt had part of their honeymoon there - in fact, in the hotel next to ours!
I can't move from here right now, not whilst I have no money. Our plan was to sell the house before all of this because of the disappointment that the builders wrecked our dream home. Still, that's another battle.
I lived on my own for years before meeting H and I was always so glad that I would never have to live alone again ... that fear may now be a real possibility (even though I am in our home, it feels a bit different as much of his stuff is still around me).
I admire Oz for doing as she has done with her new home but like her, I have the problem that I wouldn't be able to evidence enough income for the past two years so wouldn't be able to get my own mortgage or be seen as a safe renter. It stinks - these issues are what may force me to go back to the UK and then I would be without my cats for 6 months as they would have to quarantine ... and I really DON'T want to do that to them - or me. Leaving them here with H is not an option ... he does not deserve them for having abandoned them too.
Glad that you feel safe in your place but I guess when things change we all look for something that 'feels' better for many different reasons, not just safety.
Yeah - I wonder about twittering neighbours. I just hope that yours are not being unkind. I don't know many of mine, so that helps!
WAH 43; W 47 M 16; T 17 Cats 15 & 6 Bomb 27/05/09 ow 28/06/09
"It is only on the darkest night that we see the stars"
I'm going to cut to the chase! Apologies in advance woman style
Everything I am reading is about you waiting for h, doing things so he will notice, hanging around in the hope that h will do something. This will not help you. This time is about YOU now not your h - he is off doing his own thing. Stop counting days, this is your game plan for the moment. You aren't going to contact him. Plus if you are going to count days you count from his last contact - which is 4 or 5?
In Michele's words 'just do it'. Don't wait. If you had the security of knowing that your h would be away for a year but he would be back you'd be playing things very differently in terms of living your life. Act 'as if' that is what is happening. You already said there was nothing you could do and now you are signed up for the course. Didn't it make you feel better once you did it? But I know you probably didn't 'feel' like doing it before...
Don't hang onto the house because you think a house will bring him back. Honey, would you want him back if he was just returning for a house? You could always rent like I am doing? Do what is right for you.
Only you have the power to help you and YOU are worth it.
