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#1828109 - 08/29/09 12:22 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: PainfulDusk]
MrBond Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/08
Posts: 11163
Don't answer him. He's got alot of nerve to tell you how HE didn't want to be affected. Right now that's your plan of action. To do nothing.

Once things have calmed down, get all the information you can (credit card receipts, phone bills, etc.) and document everything. He says it was less than a month, I'm betting it was alot longer than that. Cover your bases. If a man is chicken enough to literally disappear to cover his affair, he might have stashed some money away for he and his OW.
_________________________
M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

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#1828112 - 08/29/09 12:32 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: MrBond]
PainfulDusk Offline
Member

Registered: 08/20/09
Posts: 219
Loc: Texas
Ok i can do that, its the weekend and Im just going to try like hell not to spend it in tears. Longer than a month? god my heart skipped a beat when i read that stuck.

Ok i have been documenting everything for the past few days. but not much to document until now I guess.

Most assets are mine from my parents deaths. Altho he has a nice fund himself from his dads death. All of our bank accounts are individual i didnt get joint account, the executor of my parents estate advised me not to keep any joint accounts when he went overseas. We dont have any paper billing, everything is done online. When my head doesnt hurt and im not feeling like im gonna die I will start on that.

thank so much guys , Im ....i feel like Im all alone. all my friends are my age and .... i dont really know anyone older that i can talk to or get advice from. My doctors maybe but this isnt something I really want to talk to them about. I did have to tell my doctor a few days ago that i was having some problems, I was backsliding a little i guess. I have been eating again tho, or trying to.

Dusk

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#1828118 - 08/29/09 12:47 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: PainfulDusk]
MrBond Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/08
Posts: 11163
Forget about age. Nothing beats experience. We've all been in your shoes, so DON'T EVER think that you are alone. We all know what it's like.

Whenever you get that fear or anxiety rising again, write back on here and you'll get someone to respond. Just take it one day at a time.

Although it's hard to see now, things do get better. You get stronger. I remember my first night and a number of posters here helped me going.

(((stuck)))
_________________________
M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

Top
#1828145 - 08/29/09 02:25 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: MrBond]
PainfulDusk Offline
Member

Registered: 08/20/09
Posts: 219
Loc: Texas
Ok the saga continues. He just txt me again saying he was sorry he fell asleep on me. Now, I know Im young and emotional but what is going on??? no contact for a month? sends me a suicide note, now he has sent me no less than 8 txts and sent a msg on my profile??

Anyone? I havent answered, i dont know what to say . i mean other than "ok" ?

This is all very confusing, am i missing something really obvious?

I feel like this is all a nightmare and I will wake up soon, but I dont seem to be waking up. Is he deliberately trying to make me lose my mind? Do people actually do that? A close friend of mine seems to think so. The man i married wouldnt do that but I dont know who this man is that im married to right now. Its ...almost scary

Dusk


Edited by PainfulDusk (08/29/09 02:29 AM)

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#1828148 - 08/29/09 02:29 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: MrBond]
Faith2010 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 384
Dusk-

Are you in counseling? If not, it may be something for you to think about.

You could also look for support groups in your area.

Stuck said it best...you are not alone, we've been there.
_________________________
Me: 39 H: 39
S: 15
M: 18 years
Bomb: 6/3/09
H moved out: 10/15/09
H moved back:5/30/10


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#1828152 - 08/29/09 02:31 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: Faith2010]
Faith2010 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 384
IMO - don't answer the text(at least not for a while). All of a sudden he wants to talk and you are to be at his beckon call?

Perhaps those with more experience than I can chime in...


Edited by Ashlee (08/29/09 02:32 AM)
_________________________
Me: 39 H: 39
S: 15
M: 18 years
Bomb: 6/3/09
H moved out: 10/15/09
H moved back:5/30/10


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#1828154 - 08/29/09 02:34 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: Faith2010]
PainfulDusk Offline
Member

Registered: 08/20/09
Posts: 219
Loc: Texas
Hi ashlee, counseling? no, Im not in counseling. I had a therapist when i got out of the hospital the first time in jan. I had trouble dealing with how sick I was and coping with not being able to really function. But for this ? no.

I really feel like Im losing it tho. Im sick to my stomach and had to get my o2 ank back out. thank god I got it refilled a couple of weeks ago, I was almost off it tho. Only needed it when i was out too long. i dont want to go back into the hospital again, I dont think I can handle it.

I really miss my mom right now.

Dusk

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#1828158 - 08/29/09 02:41 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: PainfulDusk]
Faith2010 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 384
((((Dusk))))

I'm so sorry about your mom.

I think counseling will do you a world of wonders. The sitch your H has created has turned your life upside-down and you need help to get thru it.

Physically, are you going to be okay? Do you have a friend with you in case something happens?

I think you mentioned your aren't particularly religious but do pray. My spirituality has taken a turn since my sitch began and I am so grateful for that. I am here today, still strong, because of my faith in God. He has helped me carry my burdens.
_________________________
Me: 39 H: 39
S: 15
M: 18 years
Bomb: 6/3/09
H moved out: 10/15/09
H moved back:5/30/10


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#1828165 - 08/29/09 02:49 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: Faith2010]
PainfulDusk Offline
Member

Registered: 08/20/09
Posts: 219
Loc: Texas
I dont feel well, my friend is staying here tonight, she is worried too. I cant breathe and feel pretty weak. But i know its from whats happening. If I get any worse Im sure she will drag me into ER. Which will stress me out further. Im still recovering which is why i cant travel. Not easily anyway.

Thank you, i had the best mom and dad ever. I wil lprobably have to lay down soon. Im so shaky. I dont know what to do about all the txts he sending. My friend threw my cell across the room. She has a bit of a temper too, funny we are so close. I dont think i can answer him tonight, i dont have the strength to deal with it. not tonight.

HUGS ashlee, thank you all for listening.....im crying again ..god i cant stop. Im going to try to get some rest.

Dusk

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#1828177 - 08/29/09 03:07 AM Re: Probably too late [Re: PainfulDusk]
Faith2010 Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 384
Dusk -

Please let us know how you are in the morning.
_________________________
Me: 39 H: 39
S: 15
M: 18 years
Bomb: 6/3/09
H moved out: 10/15/09
H moved back:5/30/10


Top
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