I'm glad I got that off my chest. I needed to purge my emotions.
Current Status:
1.) Weather permitting, I am working in the garden in the morning. 2.) I need to get my inspection sticker. 3.) I need to get my tires changed. Hate doing #2 & #3. ;[ 4.) calling you at 3:00pm 5.) going to hypnotist at 6:30pm (looking forward to that) 6.) I ordered P-90X. 7.) Save money...could be getting a promotion. Thank the Lord for Pay Day this Friday!!!
Dear JoJo, Hey there JoJo, I am glad you can come here to get all of that out. And anger can be helpful, too, as you have experienced some painful events.
And help me understand from these last few posts which ideas and thoughts are a bit of purging and which you would like to focus on and explore, OK?
And...I hope you get to work in your garden tomorrow morning! :o) Laurie
Laurie, Divorce Busting Coach Contact The Divorce Busting Center at 303-444-7004 or 800-664-2435 if you would like to schedule a telephone consultation with a DB Coach - or email virginia@divorcebusting.com for info.
Laurie, Divorce Busting Coach Contact The Divorce Busting Center at 303-444-7004 or 800-664-2435 if you would like to schedule a telephone consultation with a DB Coach - or email virginia@divorcebusting.com for info.
The anger is a funny thing. I feel like I'm stepping out from someplace where I couldn't see anything around me because it was all smothering me. Now that I am stepping away from it, I can see things more clearly. I have a better perspective now. It's not that I want to be angry at 'A'. I am just angry.
I want very much to set new boundaries for myself this time around. I want to have a more definitive nature. I want to express my boundaries with more clarity. I know he festers about problems when he says there aren't any. I also know that he used to remind me or others about the problems months later even after he said they there weren't any problems. I don't want that anymore.
I deserve and deserved to be doing all the things with A that he is doing now by himself and with his new friends.
I pray for another chance for him and me to start again and get to know each other again. I pray for times together so we can enjoy each other in the best sense.
I am eating better. Hypnotism was/is awesome. I am enjoying myself at work. I'm getting things done little by little. I'm in the process of starting some kind of exercise regime. I'm still saving $$$. I think I'm going to plan a menu to serve to my friends at my house. Maybe a bbq...
I know that I want to be and feel attractive to him and to myself.
I do appreciate your suggestions from yesterday. I do want to 'gently nudge' him. At the same time, I want to be assertive and know my own boundaries and take care of myself. I know that I want very much to enjoy him and I want to show him that he can enjoy me.
I want to do what it takes to build myself up!
I've been reading a book about flirting. I ask the guys at work what they think. They think I'm silly. I've been practicing a new walk at work.
I am going to be so better prepared as a stronger individual--better to take care of myself and better to take care of A--when God gives us our time to be together again.
1.) Baseball game with Dad was so much fun! We had a great time. The night was perfect, they even won! a.) I want to go again.
2.) A Moment at the nail salon. So, I went to get my nails done today. I'm doing things that are positive.
While I was there, I turned around and I saw A coming to the door. He said that he thought that he saw my car. He knew it was my car since it still had snow tires on it. He gave me a nice kiss. I showed him my nails. I flirted a little. He went next door to the liquor store but didn't buy anything. I waved good bye. He left to go grocery shopping next door. My heart wanted to get into my car and follow him. But I knew that it was good. I didn't have any make up on, but my nails are beautiful and I smile and was charming.
But...he came in...I saw him outside, so handsome. He walked through a crowded room to kiss me and say 'hello'. How familiar this scene was to me. I feel that God wants me to trust him. I feel that God is answering my prayers. My plan was not to see him this week and wait. But God's plan was for him to be in my life today. I was happy and ready...no makeup...but it was good. God wants me to believe in him. I am tryiing.
Just in case I'm welcome here, these are my immediate goals.
1. Go to bed and get some rest. 2. Get up and go to work tomorrow. 3. Find a job that's closer to home. 4. Do not contact H, at least until our anniversary, which is on May 26th. 5. Keep doing EMDR therapy. 6. Lose weight.
Hey jojo. I got my toenails painted last weekend. :):):)
