Does the Celaxa not work somewhat as an appetite suppressant?
The Zoloft definitely does!
Although when the cooler weather gets here I always want to eat more and heavier foods. Guess I must think I am going hibernate!!!!!! And I don't even live in Canada!
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
"..He KNOWS these are my LL’s, but so far he’s shown little inclination to fill up these tanks. And so I fill my face with food.."
I am such an emotional eater also. I know exactly what I need to do to lose weight, I even exercise regularly but I am addicted to food. That quick fix of chocolate. The fact that I am doing something I know I shouldn't be.
I even taped on my fridge.."Is what I am about to do going to bring me closer to my goal or farther away." This definatley applies to food also.
Watch Dr. Phil, monday and tuesday this week. I am taping the shows. I also just got his new book from the library. I think he is right on target re: Healing Feelings. If we conquer our emotional eating problem our weight won't be an issue.
The heavier you feel, the less sexy you feel and your H probably picks up that vibe from you.
I think talking or writing to him re: this HUGE need not being met, etc.... Is very important. Don't let this issue fester.
One trick,Shiny. When you feel like eating, come to my garden and help me weed. It is addictive, you lose calories and do not eat. And we can finish the 1999 Condesa de Leganza Crianza that I opened today for the pool party!
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
Really great insights into what's going on with you re. food, etc. I think you've laid out the issues so well...should give you a springboard for tackling them, no?
Quote: Boredom;frustrations with CJ;uncertainty.
What am I uncertain of? That our M is any better off than before.
Perhaps CJ feels better in our M, many of his issues with me have been addressed and are much, much better.
But what about my needs? It seems that CJ's trying to do stuff around the house to satisfy me, but what about strengthening our R? Romance? Affection? Letters? Notes? Flowers? Compliments?
So....one thing that's impressed me about you and CJ is your ability to "talk" about stuff ... have you considered addressing this stuff (in an email? face2face?) with him? You mentioned that he knows this stuff is your LL but he doesn't seem inclined to fill up the old love tank...could you ask for one or two very specific things that he could do for you to get the ball rolling? Don't forget to praise the stuff he IS doing (cleaning the bathroom! woohoo!!!) and ask clearly for what you need.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
As always Sage has a great point. You and CJ do seem to have very good communication now.
I would think if you phrase it right and approach him right you ought to be able to get some resolution here.
CJ makes me think, just based on your posts of some of David's character traits. He can be very caring and very concerned. He can also be VERY focused. Right now I have the feeling that he is very focused on his school work and not on what really needs to be addressed in the R.
You know can't expect him to do any "bloody mind reading"!
I really think there is no doubt of CJ's love for you, not from the emails and notes that you have gotten from him and the work he HAS done on the R.
I have not followed LL's thread but I do think CJ has demonstrated a willingness to change and work with you when you have been specific about what you need from him.
What is it that Poepad said on Tal's thread, something like us guys just don't get it! I can't remember the quote exactly.
I am also guessing that some of the feelings of insecurity and he doesn't love me "that way" feelings are coming from your physical pain right now and your unhappiness with your current weight and eating tendencies. PLUS not uhmm..enough physical activity for you to feel sexy even with a bit of weight gain!
You know sometimes I think I have good thoughts in my head but I don't seem to be able to write them out.
Hope you got something out of this post!
If not here is at least a hug and hope you feel better!
{{{{{Shiny}}}}}
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Busy busy day...first chance to check in and it's midnight!
Now what do you make of this?
I posted that yesterday, right? Well later in the evening, CJ came up and rubbed my shoulders, gave me a hug, went out to find some night time sinus medication for me.
Alas being a Sunday night, the pharmacy at the Safeway was closed...but he came home with a bouquet of flowers!
He commisserateed with my cold based misery, tried to bring our vacuum back to Walmart today (no receipt...damn!).
At work I finally got my computer to access my e-mail account and he'd sent me an e-mail wishing that I felt better, saying he would have ravaged me this morning, but I looked too sick....
CJ...CJ are you reading my posts??? Not that I mind, of course!
And I don't even live in Canada! 
