You truly are handling situation so well. I'm glad my messages help, but I think you have a lot of strength, character, and are very level-headed so you will be fine no matter what. You are being a great dad, a super good role model, getting out and being a little social, attending support groups, and connecting with family. I think you are doing great things for yourself and you have a great attitude.
You know I'm joking about bringing the women to the game, but I will say sometimes when a W or H realizes their S is attractive, or interesting, to others... or just sees them having a great time with others (and this doesn't mean dating or having a relationship beyond friendship!), it can cause them to think about things a little differently.
However, I still would LOVE for your W to see you somewhere with a slew of beautiful women. Just the expression on her face.
Thanks for the recipe - I'll try it out as soon as I can.
Friday night's session went well and everyone loved my cookies and brownies (got lots of complements and hugs). Afterwards we (5 women and myself) went out for coffee, talking and laughing, and having a good time till past mid-night. I would love to see W's reaction to see me with my new "friends".
This afternoon S15's team won both games (11-1 & 3-2) and he played well in the first game. W came late with her new puppy (no OM) and left early.
Thanks for the encouragement and I do know I'm level-headed but its nice to hear that as a positive. My W thought I was too level headed....not sure what that means. I still have my ups and downs but think I'm doing ok as my kids seem to be handling this situation fine so far. I still miss W very much and get angry that she did this. I do pray everyday for God to remove the anger from my heart so I can forgive her and love her unconditionally. I am realizing that I will be fine no matter what happens (if she wants to try and work out a new M or wants a D). My family, friends and IC keep telling me how great of a job I'm doing and that is a great boost to hear any day.
My dad and I took the kids and couple of their friends to the White Sox game tonight and they won 10-2
Well, better get to bed as I have the March of Dimes walk in the morning and I hope it does not rain too much....Thanks again {{{runningoutoftime}}}
Me-44 WAW-42 (ILYBNILWY) S-16 S-14 M-10/17/1992 T23 Met OM 10/10/08; Bomb 12/27/08; Moved in with OM 01/27/09 Me stronger and happier everyday!
Well, the walk this morning was great, lots of people even though it rained most of the morning. I was completely soaked but still had fun. I did a lot of thinking and praying for my W and our M and for my kids. After finishing the walk got back to our corporate tent and the CIO was grilling burgers & hot dogs for us
Got home and took a long shower then S15's girlfriend came over and I ordered pizza for them and we are watching the White Sox game.
S13's friend from out of town is here and he's been with him all weekend.
Me-44 WAW-42 (ILYBNILWY) S-16 S-14 M-10/17/1992 T23 Met OM 10/10/08; Bomb 12/27/08; Moved in with OM 01/27/09 Me stronger and happier everyday!
Went to the store last night and saw W standing outside the bar where she met OM having a cigarette. It made me sad to see her knowing she doesn't want me, but there is not much I can do about that and to keep working on myself. Keep praying and let God handle softening my W's heart. This morning I'm tired and maybe getting a cold...bummer Did have a good meeting with my boss already today and we have lots of work which helps me get through the day.
Me-44 WAW-42 (ILYBNILWY) S-16 S-14 M-10/17/1992 T23 Met OM 10/10/08; Bomb 12/27/08; Moved in with OM 01/27/09 Me stronger and happier everyday!
Talked with W this morning and she said she will take S13 to his orthodontist appointment this afternoon. I told her my car is in the shop. She said she was sorry and I told her that it's not her fault there is a problem with my car. She said she feels bad and I said that's part of life, what can you do. Hopefully, it will be fixed soon as I'm borrowing my parents van to get to work.
Me-44 WAW-42 (ILYBNILWY) S-16 S-14 M-10/17/1992 T23 Met OM 10/10/08; Bomb 12/27/08; Moved in with OM 01/27/09 Me stronger and happier everyday!
Your heart is soft enough. Sometimes you need to experience feelings. It's okay to be sad, or mad sometimes. That's perfectly normal. Don't bottle it up. Just find healthy outlets... which you seem to be good at doing. Hope your car is fixed soon. Tell W it's actually not so bad because some girl at work has offered to give you a ride to work (and anywhere else for that matter!).
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
Your heart is soft enough. Sometimes you need to experience feelings. It's okay to be sad, or mad sometimes. That's perfectly normal. Don't bottle it up. Just find healthy outlets... which you seem to be good at doing. Hope your car is fixed soon. Tell W it's actually not so bad because some girl at work has offered to give you a ride to work (and anywhere else for that matter!).
LOL...that is a good one!
S15 pitched in today's game and did well, he also got a couple of hits and his team won 10-1. Came home and the boys and I had dinner then S15 and I baked cookies for his Spanish class, I guess they liked them from before and wanted some more.
My IC says the same thing about my emotions and what I'm experiencing is all normal so I feel good that I'm not going crazy.
S13 did a good job with his speech tonight at NJHS - very proud of him
W did show up alone and waved to me and I smiled and waved back. I sat with my parents, MIL and some friends. Then my parents, MIL & S13 went to the reception after for juice and cookies. Since, my car is in the shop again for more $$$, I have my parents van so we dropped off S13 at home. I asked S15 to drive us to drop off my parents at their home. He is doing a good job driving.
Then we came home and I had to log in to work for about an hour and now we are getting ready for bed. It was hard to see W and not sit next to her and be the family we used to be just a short while ago
Me-44 WAW-42 (ILYBNILWY) S-16 S-14 M-10/17/1992 T23 Met OM 10/10/08; Bomb 12/27/08; Moved in with OM 01/27/09 Me stronger and happier everyday!
But it sounds like you were with the "group" and she was on the "outside" alone. Hopefully that was harder for her. Does she look happy? Or do you have sense of what she's thinking or feeling?
It kind of odd to me that she never expresses sadness or a "loss" of her family. Have you noticed anything that might indicate this?
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
