Hey everyone, my thread locked as I tried to post to it! The cheek of it. Here is is: left a year ago
GFI.. I checked out the link, they are good, but I was into the Two Tone, Ska thing when I was 11, but not so much now! (remember Two Tone!? So few people do, I had a black felt trilby hat from a joke shop, black tie and white shirt. Hmm, not a good look for an 11/12 year old girl !!?)
Kalni.. dont forget to buy a lottery ticket Thursday/Friday, I'm serious!
ITH... I wanted to say thankyou so much for your post! I agree that I wouldnt date, its never been me, I dont do dating and I'm not emotionally available yet anyway. If I had love at first sight with someone though (as I do), I would go for it! Why shouldnt I? He is seemingly gone and in a new R.
Also, yes, we considered ourselves M. We are both atheists and anti wedding ceremonies, so felt M without the expense! He used to tell people we didnt need to get M, as we have a "cosmic marriage" (a techincal term where the mans Sun and the womans Moon are exact conjunct in their synastry chart - this is incredibly rare). I always referred to myself as Mrs X for business things and he liked it. He did ask me to M him within the first 3 years and I said no becuase of my Mums indoctrination to NEVER get M. I'm past that now though with C and if we ever get back together (?!) I would want to get M, after all we've been through.
Hey Lisa! Well Mr Skywalker is a lovely guy, but at 11 years younger, it wouldnt work. He hasnt flirted with me either, but theres clearly a spark between us! I like his clothes/hair/taste in music, he's funny, gorgeous..ok, a bit of meaningless s*x wouldnt go amiss, but I dont think its on offer! Probably be a bad idea anyway, I'd get all attached to him and then he'd likely dump me and sail off to that London town!
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
Not much to add but I just sent you a message on FB :).
ITH
Me:34 H:36 M:5 years T: 8 years Bomb: 07/17/08 I want to be separated for 6 months--I don't know what I want the outcome to be S 07/28/08-11/08/08 Living together ~7 months D Possibly busted?!?!!!
So, I wanted to add some things about our meeting Tuesday, now I have had time to reflect.
Remember how I went on and on for weeks about wanting/needing to talk to him? When it came down to it.. it wasnt me that asked to or started the convo, he did! He didnt move to get out the car, he threw his arms tound me and he started the conversation. I didnt have to do a thing! Amazing.
For the first time in 16 months, he WANTED to talk to me and honestly. At one point (he was talking about her) he said, "its so difficult to talk to you about this".. or something, but he told me twice that "stuff has happened" - he wanted me to know that. I wish I had asked him what he meant by 'stuff'?
He said he was "in too deep" - I said, what do you mean (I am still not sure).. for you, for me, for her.. or for all three of us? He straight away said, for all three of us.. my Mum said that was positive, it was inclusive, I am still in there in his head..it wasnt just about him, or him and her?
Also, he was wearing 'my' favourite clothes...the t-shirt, jumper and coat and pumps I had bought him over recent years as presents. Its my favourite jumper and looks lovely in it. The coat was the cord blazer he had stopped wearing in January, as he thought it made him look like an old git, but he looks lovely in it and he looks like himself. I havent seen him wear it all year until we met Tuesday. He may have made an effort for me, but at least he still 'looks' the same, even after a year apart!
We had a brief convo about mortgages, he was insisting that he would cover it as he said, I'm earning a full-time wage, I'll put the money in. I was gobsmacked at this, this is the first time he has acknowledged our difference in circumstances and he is behaving like he is responsible for me?
He told me he is wearing "the full front" to her...yet I could tell from 8 metres away that he was not ok. So she must be a very unenlightened person if she doesnt realise he is so depressed.
Also, he texted me Thursday to say "it was good to see you".. this is the first time all year he has told me that, even after all that contact, he would never say it was good to see ME..He also told me Tuesday that he missed me.. again, hes never said that. At the bomb, he said he was ending it becuase he DIDNT miss me.
So I could now wait and see when he emails me this week, as he will, to arrange driving home Friday. Or.. I could just email him and be friendly? What have I got to lose at this point? I need to ingratiate my way back into his life/pysche.
I am feeling annoyed today.. that he just started dating some random woman that jumped him at a work do!
Irrelevant: I am eating butterschotch cookies (or something similarly named)from M&S. I call them calory bombs... And I am drinking (cold) tea. Gosh, you girls are rubbing off on me... S
I was just thinking, he will not call you because he knows you are meeting him on Friday. No use to put extra effort. He will only call to make the arrangements...
Yes, I do! Wow, thats a lot of band action. I like going to band night here.
He was very keen to drive me home.. in fact he announced it rather than asked! He said..I've been thinking.. or I am going to drive you... something like that! I was happy to accept as I need to go home anyway. So, we WILL be in contact this week, I just wonder if I should be normal and email him about it, rather than wait. We will be couped up in his car for 4 hours. Like old times. I'm looking forward to it.
I wish they would split up ASAP! One thing is certain, I AM the greener grass! She sounds like a grade-A nightmare. I'm wondering if she will mind, or is insecure that he is off on a 'lads' holiday on Saturday for a week with 5 guys? (he is dreading it and said he just wants to sit quietly and read books !!).
