The continuing story of the Lake Erie Shore

[1hope]

Oh. Of course. I'm much neater though. I'd have them in a matching, zippered, leather, nut bag.

I never thought about splitting them up. They'd be tough for you to find if she changed her purse every time she changed her outfit.

Seriously though, I know how you feel Neil. During my life, I have been on both sides of the fence. I left my 1st H, when I found out he was cheating on me. He was devastated.

I can tell you though, cause aside, the more he called and crawled the stronger it made me feel. The more determined I was to end the M.

When he began to GAL, I really began to take notice.

[Neilh23]

the thing is, hope, i haven't really crawled or called her. I'vew been doing my thing....and trying to validate whenever i talk to her.

just frustrating that's all.

thank you all for your support too.....

i jsut feel lost somedays...

[Neilh23]

i really wish i could explain why i feel hopeless sometimes....and so frustrated.


you guys probably think i'm a big loser because i have a good sitch and many things going for me...yet i say so many negative things

[Continuing]

the thing is, hope, i haven't really crawled or called her. I'vew been doing my thing....

Yea, but this is all about perception. I doesn't matter WHAT you do, for the most part; you wife will interpret it however she wants to. Even when you are literally not doing anything, she will project whatever image she wants to on to you.

Thats why GAL is for you, not her. Who know's how long it will take for their perception of things to change, that is their work and business. We have enough trouble managing ourselves let alone their mental state.

Keep on going...she will have to work her stuff out and you cannot help with that.

In the meantime, its ok to feel crappy sometimes, its a crappy situation. But don't forget to be happy too, theres life to be lived!

[Neilh23]

you know...i feel like i'm sucking at this DBing stuff...LOL....ugh

FG, could use your assistance here....i'm stuck.....i think...

[Neilh23]

tdad....did you have this much self doubt?

[Bworl]

Neil,

You're normal. Perfectly normal.

Your registration date is June, not sure how long before that you were dealing with this stuff, but I'm assuming it hasn't been all that long.

It sucks. In the quiet moments it's hard as hell to turn off the little voices that send us those not so pretty messages.

Read a book. Play a game. Watch a movie. Do something to take your mind off of the SITCH. Let it go. Things have a way of changing with time and rest. Chances are that tomorrow you'll wake up and once again feel ready to tackle things with full energy.

Again, you're fine.

Quit beating yourself up.

Nothing is being decided today, tomorrow, or even this week.


Blessings and rest,

Bill

[Neilh23]

Bill...
i got the DR book around memorial day...and started to do the LRT that weekend. If i look back, things have improved drastically since then.

i know i need to stop reacting to her when she drops those little lines about the D word. to be completely honest, it's been awhile since i have and awhile since she said it. I admittedly haven't been in a good place emotionally for a couple of days.......not completely sure as to why.......but i see my IC today....hope to get some clarity there

the funny thing is....is that i know i'm doing ok. it's just that sometimes, when i get impatient...i don't believe it. LOL.

thanks for your support....it means alot. all of you.

[Kenny]

Neil,

I agree with you that is hard not to get frustrated and down on yourself sometimes.

Bill and others post the most rational and sensible stuff I have heard in a long long time.

Its hard to move away from doing what you believe is right and I am making a lot of mistakes too. Trying to GAL when you have had a confidence knock as bad as this is hard.

My w is still at home but wants to go. Trying to find the space in the house to get away when she is alien and angry isn't always easy. Trying to be smiley and happy in the face of adversity is really hard.

You dont suck. Stick at it.

[Neilh23]

Thanks Kenny-

I don't envy your position. NOt at all. I don't know if i could keep up the happy face the entire time.

i guess it's something you need to force yourself to do, even when you don't want to...GALing...

i went to my friends house to help them paint it (i got to tinker)...went oout to dinner (outback steakhouse....good food), went to my best friends house, and bitched for an hour. Felt good to get some stuff out. YOu need an outlet.