not sure where to put this. has anybody done this...gone and had a personal session with michele? am curious as to couples who have and their experience.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
My H and I met with Michele a few months ago. What would you like to know?
Although my H and I have a long way to peicing it was a positive experience for us. We went from harboring a lot of hostility to being able to be friends from the moment we returned. My M hasn't turned around yet but he also wasn't very receptive, however I do think it planted a seed of doubt in his mind. I am guessing if you are a regular in peicing that your H is open to it. Even if you aren't, but your H is somewhat receptive to it it will be a great experience for you. You can't go wrong by seeing Michele. There just may be more opportune times.
I'm happy to answer any of your questions.
Posts Role Reversal(original) WAW now LBS part I & II WAW now LBS part III(current) T: 9 yrs M: 8 yrs WAW: Sep 06-Jul 07 LBS: Sep 07-pres.
L2, h told me on sunday about a buddy of his who was separated (I have met him a couple of times) and he and his wife really tried to work things out. he told h the best money he ever spent was for this weekend thing in colorado. he and his w still ended up divorced, but he said it was an amazing experience and the best money he ever spent. then h went on to ask me if I'd heard of her, weiner-davis. I almost choked, lol. I acted cool, but inside, wow. at first I thought he was feeling me out because he had found these boards, but in the end the way he was talking and such made me feel that wasn't the case.
we didn't talk any more about it, but I know he would be gung ho to go. although he knows its a lot of money, he doesn't know how much...not sure that might turn him off or not. we'll talk more this weekend, but its starting to appeal to me more for some reason. so maybe....
hopeful, did you do the 1 day or 2 day session? were you sent home with materials that you both could work on together? or was it pretty much just the books? did you feel like you accomplished a lot while there? It seems like you were probably in a different place where we are right now...don't know your situation, though, so tell me if I am wrong. in a nutshell my h left last summer and has been living with ow until a week or so ago when he left her and asked to reconcile...lots more than that, but in a nutshell that covers it. so he is pretty motivated.
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
hopeful, did you do the 1 day or 2 day session? were you sent home with materials that you both could work on together? or was it pretty much just the books? did you feel like you accomplished a lot while there? It seems like you were probably in a different place where we are right now...don't know your situation, though, so tell me if I am wrong. in a nutshell my h left last summer and has been living with ow until a week or so ago when he left her and asked to reconcile...lots more than that, but in a nutshell that covers it. so he is pretty motivated.
Yes your sitch is different than mine. I was a WAW who, after 9months of sep, decided to reconcile. Long story short, my H had decided to give up at that point and I became the LBS. My H is also far from wanting to work things out, at least as far as I can tell, but it still did wonders for our relationship. It also, like I said, planted that seed of doubt. Michele showed him that his expectation and ideas about M were just part of those many myths she discusses in her book. I believe that he will begin to see that she was in fact right. We didn't get along very well before and now we are good friends.
You are in a much better position since your H is motivated to work on the marriage. I agree with his friend. IT IS the best money I have ever spent. It will help you to approach/see M differently and show you how to handle your particular issues. She is great at getting to the issues, finding a solution and making you feel comfortable all the while. She is unlike any therapist, counselor etc. that I have ever met.
I did the one day session and was sent home with the KLA series. I haven't been able to use it yet but when we do reconcile I am sure that it will be an excellent tool.
Good luck. Your story gives me hope and I am very happy for you.
Last edited by HOPEFULinCALI; 05/21/0811:04 PM.
Posts Role Reversal(original) WAW now LBS part I & II WAW now LBS part III(current) T: 9 yrs M: 8 yrs WAW: Sep 06-Jul 07 LBS: Sep 07-pres.
thank you so much! we have a long road ahead of us, and I'm fearful of getting my hopes up here. am starting to let him in a bit and it scares me very much. so you felt the 1 day session was helpful enough to recommend it? because the 2 day one is out of reach (at least in my book!) for us. am curious to see what h thinks of the 1 day one...will talk to him this weekend.
hopefully your situation works out the way you would like it to! good luck!
oh, another question, h has not read any of her books and isn't a big book guy (well, not self help, anyway). can he go in cold or does he need to do reading ahead of time?
M-41 H-38 M-10 years, T-14 years Bomb-PA 3/19/07 Separated-6/7/07 Piecing/h back home 5/08 S-6 S-4 D-4
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says, 'I'll try again tomorrow.'"
The one day session was absolutely helpful and worth it. I am confident that you will walk away will a renewed confidence in making your marriage work and the tools to do so.
Your husband doesn't need to read the book before he goes in. Michele will give you and your H all the information you need to understand your M and how to proceed.
Go for it and good luck!
Posts Role Reversal(original) WAW now LBS part I & II WAW now LBS part III(current) T: 9 yrs M: 8 yrs WAW: Sep 06-Jul 07 LBS: Sep 07-pres.
