So , Monday W sends text “I’ll come and give you a hand tonight doing the plants in the garden as we always used to do that together, sure enough 7 o’clock she turns up and we both spent the next hour and half sorting the plants out .i Offered to get us both a take away which I did , although I do have to chuckle as each time I get the same reply “I’ll pay for the next one” she never does but I don’t mind I know she hasn’t much money and who am I to resent paying for a takeaway at least she was woman enough to offer to come round and help do the plants ,anyway it’s only a bit of money .so we eat said takeaway all is fine but as I am eating I get a strange feeling that I haven’t had before ,it was a feeling that something is missing ,I could not put my finger on it and still do not know what it was . I know the whole dynamic of how we interact with each other has changed but I never felt it like I felt it the other night, very strange indeed . I don’t know maybe I’m becoming more tuned in to something . Talking to a friend who knows of our situation he came up with does it feel Like something hanging in the air but it wasn’t Like that it was something totally different as we did interact normally as such . anyways it was a nice few hours together. I gave her a lift back to her room later on and although the last time we sat chatting for 10 mins or so this time I didn’t want to said my See you later and she said the same and that was that’ .but overall not a bad night .
So yesterday don’t know what happened was I feeling sorry for myself ,did I become overwhelmed with everything because at 630 just after work, got home and unfortunately for me I got emotional .i let it out felt better afterwards but couldn’t help thinking those old thoughts again only this time I let them come and then let them go .it lasted a while but eventually they passed . It is so strange how thoughts can make you feel so rotten yet once they’ve passed you tell yourself “you silly sausage what was that all about “ ,bit of processing maybe who knows . I had to take the cat to the vet unfortunately he’s done something to his eye which has got an infection in it and has closed up ,so there I was later on trying to put some cream into his eye ,such hard work trying to hold him and Apply said cream ,needless to say I’ve got a nice few scratches now and I dare say I’ll have a few more yet as he’s got to have them in twice a day for a week so I expect a few more yet lol .anyway today’s a different day one more day further into my journey one more day hopefully closer to the finish line although the finish line seems to be in another galaxy at the moment and though I think that yesterday was an unexpected bump on the road I’m travelling .I think it done good to let it out and then move on . Hope you all have a good peaceful weekend I’m off to the opticians to see if they can teach me the correct way to put contact lenses in as I’m struggling with them and don’t want to blind myself lol . R678
I'm sorry you were having a bad day. Hopefully, today will be better.
About your cat, wrap him in a towel so that he doesn't claw you.
Putting contact lenses in isn't hard. They will show you the proper way and once you've done it a couple of times, you will become a pro.
Hang in there.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
You are so right. They’re just temporary. Thoughts and feelings.
Some thoughts can make you feel bad, and some feelings can make you think bad. It’s really nice when our own inner voice helps straighten us out during those periods of processing.
I am guessing you very recently got contact lenses. Between yourself and the cat you’ll be a pro at dealing with eyes in no time.
Wrapping the cat up in a towel is a really good idea. Such an simple elegant solution, those are the best ones. I would’ve been scratched head to toe and still probably not thought of that. It’s going in the memory banks.
Hope you have a wonderful day.
DnJ
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
So this is a dilemma I’ve always suffered with horrendous migraines they come in batches well guess what , the batch is back .been here couple of weeks now only problem is the medication I take ,yes it kills the headache eventually but the side effects aren’t good at all . Had one come on just as I was going to bed lady night .took said medication and eventually fell asleep only problem is next morning you feel terrible ,depressed, anxiety just as though bomb drop was yesterday ,feeling down, low mood pretty terrible really . So not only have I got the emotional cycling to contend with I also have the side effects of said medication. So what’s the answer don’t take medication, suffer the migraine or take medication and feel terrible later on . Sometimes it’s so bad I feel as I felt last year . I don’t know the answer to that one I’ve tried different medications but the only one that works is the triptans ,the one I take . Personally I think I’ll have to suffer because feeling like I do is not helping my recovery . On the mlc front well W still comes round now and again picks up different things whilst theres no spewing or nastiness just normal chit chat but I do find I have some expectations which I know I shouldn’t have ,so eventually the feelings I have come back .my own fault really for having said expectations in the first place .were 14 or 15 months since bd so why am I not getting past it , will I feel like this for ever or is it a mix of medication and my own insecurity who knows . Forgive me if I’m rambling I just feel so mixed up today , fear of the migraine coming back thoughts of mlc wife constantly on my mind, fear of the future ,I don’t know maybe I’m in a big rut and I can’t see through the fog of my mind (that sounds familiar) .ive been reading lots still ,maybe a bit of mlc overload . One word springs to mind which has become a bugbear of mine REPLAY.ohh that word lol . I can sort of get a feel of how the mlc mind works with all the ups and downs I have . I know it’s a journey and a rollercoaster but sometimes I just want to get off . . anyhow enough of feeling sorry for myself keep on the path I tell myself . Happy days to you all. R678
Migraines can be downright terrible. And yes medication can have some pretty bad side effects. In your case it does sound rather bad. How long do your migraines usually last? Vs how long do the side effects last? The way you spoke it looks like the medication side effects are worse.
Replay. Oh that word. It is interesting when we can empathize with what our spouses are living, it must be quite a jumble.
Our own rollercoasters do have there share of hills and valleys. It’s pretty nice when the ride slows and coasts in to the unloading area. Don’t worry when you are ready you will disembark.
Expectations, fear, rut, fog, mixed up - it’s ok we all have days like that. It settles, it gets better. Hang in there and have faith my friend.
DnJ
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
Daily magnesium, CoQ10 and riboflavin may reduce the frequency of migraines, as can reducing food triggers (both my sister and my son are gluten sensitive and their migraines are MUCH better since going gluten-free).
Can you still control the migraine with half a dose of the triptan? Maybe you're just taking too strong a pill.
