You handled all of that PERFECTLY! I am so happy for you, I actually have tears in my eyes typing this.
Kech, notice a couple of things. He keeps talking.....but not acting. That is huge. WASs always talk a big game. Also, he is showing his jealousy. Men that don't care do not get jealous. I've known quite a few guys that cheated on their wives and left them for the OW. Not once did they care when the W started seeing someone. The only ones that cared are the ones that didn't leave for the OW. I don't mean to give you false hope, but his annoyance and anger are actually, in my opinion, very good sings.
Also, he is projecting. His guilt over having an OW makes him lash out at you as if you have an OM because it eases his conscience. And he also keeps bringing up the past to make himself feel better about his choice too. Here is the thing, he knows it is bogus. He knows that even if you were the worst W in the history of marriage, it doesn't give him the right to sleep with other women.
Keep it up! You are turning into a DB ninja!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Link W:"H, I am sorry that you feel the need to continually accuse me of inappropriate behaviour. The last thing I need to further complicate my life now is dealing with another man."
I am sure you can use it at some point.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Link W:"H, I am sorry that you feel the need to continually accuse me of inappropriate behaviour. The last thing I need to further complicate my life now is dealing with another man."
I am sure you can use it at some point.
LOVE IT
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
I agree with Steve. He's jealous seeing you looking good when you leave. When my WW would get dressed up to go to work or dinner with he family I would feel this pain in my stomach. I wanted to compliment her and hold her but we were "separated". I suspect thats what he is feeling. Keep up the good work.
The other day I had jeans and a decent shirt on my wife came home from work and said do you mind if I wear sweats to dinner. I said sure why do you ask? Because you look so nice. I think it cant be overstated how important looking your best is. They notice see what they are missing!!
M 55. W 43 T 12. M 8 1st BD 9\16 W moved out 11\16 Recon moved back 2/17 2nd BD 8/12/18
Thank you so much everyone. Steve, to hear you think I did a good job over the weekend makes me SOO HAPPY you have no idea! You and r2c have been my guides through this entire process, I am so grateful to have you guys and ALL OF YOU on my side through this journey.
After work yesterday H sent me a text that he will not be going out of town anymore next weekend. I didnt respond, as it was an informational text and I didnt see a reason to. 2 hours later he sent me another text saying "hello??", since I didnt respond I guess.
I waited a little while and then just responded "ok". He wrote again saying his mom wants to see the baby and can we arrange something, I said ya and he responded thanks and that was that.
I was surprised to receive the "hello" text. But after work yesterday I went home, made myself a nice healthy dinner, fed the baby, bathed her, let her play while I ate my dinner, then got some stuff done around the house and had a pretty nice evening to myself with D. He comes tonight to see D, so I will leave when he gets there and I have plans to go get my nails done and maybe go search for some new heels for the wedding I have coming up this weekend.
I have my moments, but I really do just keep trying to remind myself, would I even want him back? Would I be able to live that way, nervous about his every move, scared about who he is texting, how hes feeling, is he thinking of someone else, etc. What he is doing is wrong and its so hurtful and hes trying to deflect that by constantly bringing up the past and things I did wrong. I dont doubt his feelings at all, im not belittling them, but it doesnt justify what he is doing.
I know when he comes over he feels better bc he gets that glimpse into our world, so I kind of hate that tonight is his night, id like him to have to miss us a little more. But its ok. I will leave as soon as he gets there.
I know when he comes over he feels better bc he gets that glimpse into our world, so I kind of hate that tonight is his night, id like him to have to miss us a little more. But its ok. I will leave as soon as he gets there.
You don't know that. I'd say him coming over, seeing you leaving all dolled up, looking smoking hot, DOESN'T make him feel better.
By the way, did he ever take the dog to the vet?
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
Thank you so much everyone. Steve, to hear you think I did a good job over the weekend makes me SOO HAPPY you have no idea! You and r2c have been my guides through this entire process, I am so grateful to have you guys and ALL OF YOU on my side through this journey.
glad we can help make a difference.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
