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equalzr Offline OP
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Yes im contributing everything i have. W makes great $ and i make chump change at the moment because i was a stay at home dad whonworked part time to supplement the $. Im nervous about switching jobs at the moment because of the looming custody battle. I dont know how availability and length of employment will affect it, ill have to ask a L aboit it. At this point im still passing up possible opportunities to fit W and S's schedule and thats what got me to this place.

Even so, im contributing about half, and W is living the high life with her money.


Together:20 years
M:3 years
Me:40
WW:40
S15
A suspected:5/17
AC:5/18
BD:8/18
WW in full blown R w/ OM
Still under same roof
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 330
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equalzr Offline OP
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So what is the correct response to your W insinuating that your off to see another woman when your leaving the house looking awesome? Serious question. I would have loved to give her both barrels after what shes done to our family but held firm and played it nice and cool.

W was pi***d when i left the house looking extra nice. She claims i didnt dress up and take her out during R, which isnt completely accurate. We dressed up and went out but didnt go out near as nuch as we should have in hindsight. Im looking dressier than usual, but i always looked nice when we went out. I told her im sorry she feels that way and she replied that she doesnt "feel anyway about it".

My W's comment before i left was "i hope she likes your new outfit". I just shook my head and walked away.

Last edited by equalzr; 09/16/18 01:29 AM.

Together:20 years
M:3 years
Me:40
WW:40
S15
A suspected:5/17
AC:5/18
BD:8/18
WW in full blown R w/ OM
Still under same roof
Joined: Feb 2017
Posts: 9,227
Likes: 309
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E,

Yep let her think what she wants but it doesn't change anything. She doesn't want you but she doesn't want anyone else to have you in case she want to revert back to plan b (you) in the future.

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equalzr Offline OP
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Your right LH19. I just kept quiet about it. W even asked "how was your date" later that night. I wanted to say im married and i have morals and standards, but i kept it to myself.

On a side note, even though i still dont have any real interest in other women it felt really good to get looks from some good looking ladies. A little bit of a confidence booster if you will, and i definitely need to rebuild that.


Together:20 years
M:3 years
Me:40
WW:40
S15
A suspected:5/17
AC:5/18
BD:8/18
WW in full blown R w/ OM
Still under same roof
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 330
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equalzr Offline OP
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Posts: 330
This really s**ks. Im still married, but im so damn lonely. I dont have any interest in other women, which i shouldnt because im married, but its tough having nobody. I dont have any family near me either to spend time with. Its tough not really having a R to be in even though thats what i need and this is a period of growth for me.

I didnt sign up for this when i got married.


Together:20 years
M:3 years
Me:40
WW:40
S15
A suspected:5/17
AC:5/18
BD:8/18
WW in full blown R w/ OM
Still under same roof
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 144
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Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 144
One day at a time my friend. I know exactly how you feel. It's a horrible feeling. And being single and lonely is very hard. All I can say is it will take time. You're definitely a very very strong person. Somewhere out there is someone who deserves a great person ..that's you. And you deserve way better. And when you do..I bet your X will finally realize everything she lost. I know you're not there yet and that's where it takes time. You suffered for so long. I'd say, take time and get yourself back on track. I've been married so long, its hard to figure out stuff to do. I'm sorry your going through this nightmare. I cant wait for you to write about how much happier you are. That day will come sooner than you think. I found it very interesting that your W was drilling you about meeting up with some other person. She got a small taste of what it's like. Weird stuff. Hang in there buddy.


ME 47 W 38
M17 T20
Separated 5/20/18
D-bomb 7/9/2018 Nothing Filed
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Just keep DB man. Keep moving forward. Time makes you stronger.


WW H(me): 53
W: 48
T: 27 M: 22
S: 18
Piecing since 03/2016
Saw the light in the storm
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equalzr Offline OP
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Lane, it is tough. Ive been with this woman my entire adult life and im 40. I honestly have no clue how to live life without her. Dont get me wrong, im building, working my 180's, and truly working on GAL, but its a process and i need to step it up to the next level.

Neffer, your right, its going to take time. I look forward to the day i dont hurt over this and when its not constantly on my mind. Im going to step up my DB efforts this week and that starts with me.

Mornings are so damn tough for some reason. I wake up and live the same nightmare over and over. This week im going to get a planner/organizer. Ive been doing really good with my to do lists, but i want to take it to the next level. I want to schedule my day down to the hour and maximize my days. Im going to do everything possible to make sure i have the greatest chance at being successful.


Together:20 years
M:3 years
Me:40
WW:40
S15
A suspected:5/17
AC:5/18
BD:8/18
WW in full blown R w/ OM
Still under same roof
Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 494
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Joined: Aug 2018
Posts: 494
Eq, we are all there and this is a strange new journey when you have been with only one person for so long, 19 years here. Exact same responses from my WW that you got in regards to leaving house looking different, coming home later, etc. I'm often met with hostility, asking for D, "must be nice to have money for new clothes" when she has spent thousands this summer on entire new wardrobe for OM, etc. Shows they are noticing and inspiration to keep dbing and GAL.


H-50
W-48
T-19
M -18
S23, S14
BD - 5/9/2018
OM discovered 5/10/2018

In house sep - 8/18/2018
Rope drop 2/15/2019
R'ing since 3/15/2019
Joined: Jul 2018
Posts: 330
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equalzr Offline OP
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Originally Posted by lost8
Eq, we are all there and this is a strange new journey when you have been with only one person for so long, 19 years here. Exact same responses from my WW that you got in regards to leaving house looking different, coming home later, etc. I'm often met with hostility, asking for D, "must be nice to have money for new clothes" when she has spent thousands this summer on entire new wardrobe for OM, etc. Shows they are noticing and inspiration to keep dbing and GAL.


Its still amazes me that they almost all follow the same script. My W has clothes etc coming in every other day, went on a cruise with OM, has went on 2-3 out of state vacations and much more. I have no clue what goes on inside their brain that makes them so clueless at times.


Together:20 years
M:3 years
Me:40
WW:40
S15
A suspected:5/17
AC:5/18
BD:8/18
WW in full blown R w/ OM
Still under same roof
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