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rminer- Great job ! So many people here would trade spots with you instantly- Thanks for giving all of us hope. Proceed with caution. Stay strong - Stay Well!


M51 w50
T-20Yrs M-16Yrs
S15- mad at W for not trying and giving up
1 Awesum dog
BD 10/31/17
separate rooms 02/08/18
wife moved out 05/17/18

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rminer Offline OP
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Thanks, ovrrnbw.  I appreciate it.

It is a relief to know everything to do with OM is out of our lives, including the pack.

I haven't picked that book up in awhile but it sounds like a good idea.


M: 25 T:33
Me: 48 W: 49
S24, D21, D18, D15, S8 All living at home while going to school
A confirmed: 12-25-17
EA Definite PA Probable
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rminer Offline OP
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Thanks, LoneWlf.  I know people here would gladly take my place, which makes me feel a little guilty about my post.

Everyone here should have hope because DBing does work and there are a lot of great people here to guide and support you through the process.

It's not over yet for me and my W as there is still a lot of work to be done, but we are now headed in the right direction.

The best of luck to you!


M: 25 T:33
Me: 48 W: 49
S24, D21, D18, D15, S8 All living at home while going to school
A confirmed: 12-25-17
EA Definite PA Probable
Joined: Jan 2018
Posts: 132
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rminer Offline OP
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Steve,

You sound almost as excited as I was!  At least for the A to be over and the decision to move forward together.   The rest is a bit depressing but as you said, knowing for sure is a good thing.  Now I will be able to deal with it out in the open and work on putting it behind us.

We are looking in to MC, but haven't decided who and when yet.  I've talked to a few, but they don't seem to be what I want - pro marriage.  I don't think we will, but if we should start to backslide I want someone who will help us work through it instead is simply understand why.

Thank you for the encouragement and advice throughout the first part of this process.  It would have so much harder without it.

BTW, I keep forgetting to say that I like your quote in your signature line!


M: 25 T:33
Me: 48 W: 49
S24, D21, D18, D15, S8 All living at home while going to school
A confirmed: 12-25-17
EA Definite PA Probable
Joined: Jan 2018
Posts: 132
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rminer Offline OP
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Thank you, sandi.  I don't if I could have done it without your brutal honesty and insight. You certainly have changed the way I look at and approach things, which wasn't always pleasant, but was necessary.

I'm not working on the house nearly as much and we have a dedicated evening we spend together every week now on top of any family time or other things we may do together.

I know we are not out of the woods yet, but we are going in the right direction together and I believe that we are going to make it.

You are an awesome lady!

Thank you for everything!


M: 25 T:33
Me: 48 W: 49
S24, D21, D18, D15, S8 All living at home while going to school
A confirmed: 12-25-17
EA Definite PA Probable
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Ahhh, what a sweet thing to say. It means a lot to me, Rminer. I am just so happy to see these results......and it would not have happened if you had not done the hard stuff.

Congratulations!

((hugs))


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
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