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Joined: Apr 2014
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T
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And so? She calls immediately? Don't answer that either.

You're out busy, you're not at her beckon call. Let her sweat. You don't owe her anything. She made that choice!


M 31 H 34
S 6 S 9
BD 2/14 Piecing 8/14
T384 #2756223 08/12/17 06:44 AM
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I agree with T. That's DBing. You become more attractive when you aren't easily accessible.


M: 33, W: 30 @BD
M 7, T 10
BD: Early Dec
W left: Late Dec
W got stuff: Late Jan
W sent S papers: Mid Feb
OM cnfrmd: Late Feb

Pain can yield tremendous growth OR everlasting sadness and bitterness.
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dale165 Offline OP
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Point well taken T and Wsh. Good week otherwise. Her sniffing around usually gets me excited but I did my best to block expectations out. Just carried on with work since I'm crunched for time and extensions are due next month for businesses. Not too much GAL this week but the work I got done made me feel good. Start that divorce support group tonight so hope that is helpful.


M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year
T 7 Years

Wife left October 2016
Affair began August 2016

Me 31 years old
Wife 29 years old
Joined: Apr 2014
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Why not make a goal of a few days of no answering her calls or texts?

Then it will get easier to not respond. Is there anything you guys NEED to talk about? You don't have children so I imagine it's a pretty 'clean' break as far as not much communication needs to occur.


M 31 H 34
S 6 S 9
BD 2/14 Piecing 8/14
T384 #2756284 08/13/17 04:56 AM
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dale165 Offline OP
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Hey T I can handle that! And nope nothing that's needed to talk really. She has all her stuff and no kids so nothing pressing whatsoever. Only thing that's hers that's here is her wedding dress but I think we know why she didn't take that lol.

I don't think that would be hard bc there really is nothing to talk about, hey how's OM? How's the weather? Pretty much nothing!


M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year
T 7 Years

Wife left October 2016
Affair began August 2016

Me 31 years old
Wife 29 years old
Joined: Oct 2015
Posts: 906
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Originally Posted By: dale165
my friends wont let me think about R while there! They don't quite understand my sitch and generally think I should tell her to hit the road but they been overall supportive.


Actually, your friends are right. If you did tell her to hit the road then that would be the last thing she'd want to do. It's weird how matters of the heart work with human beings. They want what they can't have.



The future is as bright as you demand it be.
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Told my W to leave if she's so unhappy and she is still here. Every now and then she'll move in the direction of divorce, but then doesn't follow through. Thus we are here in limbo. Sounds as if that's what your sitch is. Keep maintaining the distance if possible.


MR: 15 T:17
Me: 37 W: 34
S14
BD/PA/EA: 12/2016
Tread #2756401 08/14/17 07:16 AM
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dale165 Offline OP
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So what you think Tx, actually say that or continue no contact more or less?? I really have no choice to deal with R right now because all my sloppiness with work after BD is piling up. I have one month from tomorrow to finish all my extended corporate and partnerships, and its a lot. 6 10s from here to then will be needed.

Tread I can appreciate your patience. If my W still lived with me doing the things she done our house may be blown up. It must be tough to be S or quasi S under the same roof.


M 1.5 years, her affair was before 1 year
T 7 Years

Wife left October 2016
Affair began August 2016

Me 31 years old
Wife 29 years old
Joined: Apr 2014
Posts: 1,680
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S under the same roof isn't for the faint of heart


M 31 H 34
S 6 S 9
BD 2/14 Piecing 8/14
Joined: Apr 2017
Posts: 815
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Dale,

What makes it bad is that W in her mind thinks she is single already. A friend of ours was trying to talk some sense into W. And the only thing my W could aay in her defense was that "I told Tread I wanted a divorce." Never prior to this A would she have said such a thing. W has clearly lost her damn mind.


MR: 15 T:17
Me: 37 W: 34
S14
BD/PA/EA: 12/2016
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