New Terrain? Or more of the same? (New thread)

[DifRent]

Thank you for sharing your experience, PP, and for the hugs. Big hugs back, I need them. It means a lot coming from you.

I've actually decided to go stay with my mom the next few days, so there won't be any game playing. My job is remote and I have that freedom now. And hers is a peaceful home. Things will suck just a little bit less there, I think.

[PigPen]

Good for you for doing that Dif! The tornado is going to happen and you'll feel it but if there's no law that says you have to be there to stand in it.

I'm going to send you as much strength as I can. This is the hellish time and there's no way around it. All you can do is lean in, breathe softly, and take it moment by moment. This too shall pass Dif.

Frame the next week however you have to to make it through it.

Even more hugs Dif.

PP

[DifRent]

Thank you, thank you. I am sure your strength will help carry me through, my friend.

[gonegrl]

Good for you Different. You will be much better off at your mom's. And I just read your post where a friend sent a letter to OW? Any fallout from that? I had talk a friend out of confronting H for me last week. People are well intentioned but yes, could only make things worse.

[DifRent]

No word yet, Photoka... maybe they are ignoring it, not saying anything to me, maybe it hasn't arrived... I don't know. I don't plan to feed into it at all should it come up. It has been suggested that there could be a positive that comes out of it: a truth dart from someone else that plants another seed for WW. But who knows. The only good thing for sure is that I have friends who do care and are outraged for me. Perhaps that energy could have been better spent, but I have no control over what's already been done, so all I can do is move on.

[CaliGuy]

Dif

I've been keeping up on you, I post little nowadays but just wanted to give us a thumbs up as I know the coming days/weeks will be trying. I think she needs this ... But more importantly you need this.

As far as the note... My hunch is that's just another thing the predator will spin, make it all about them against the world but for your W I believe it's another seed in that garden that will over grow and choke her out a bit, time will tell where you will be when/if that happens

[DifRent]

Thanks, Cali... I've not been posting much either, but it's good to know I have the support of good friends like you here. Hope things are going well for you. I think of and pray for you often.

[WhyUs]

DifRenf,

It has been a while since I have checked in to your thread. You have lot of positive things to look forward to in your life. I could feel your energy in those posts that talked about your new job. Capture that feeling and energy to help get you through these next couple of weeks. Your doing great!

[DifRent]

Thank you WhyUs. You're right, lots of good things. Going to focus on them.

[DifRent]

Hello, just checking in, looking for some feedback. Maybe from Wonka???

It's been a challenging week in many ways. Monday night I could not sleep - I was spiritually disturbed, all these crazy thoughts or visions about her, dark things, kept me awake and left me exhausted. I had an early day and unpleasant work to do all morning yesterday, in a place that just kept certain memories too much at the forefront of my mind. In the afternoon, I had a great and inspiring business call, so my mood began to shift a bit. My dear friend insisted that I have dinner with her family and spend the night at her place in their guest room. I did - had a few drinks and enjoyed the weather, and wound up sleeping surprisingly well. I woke this morning in a better mood than I have in a very long time, not exactly sure why. Had a fairly productive day, then came home, knowing I'd encounter a mostly empty house, since she was doing most of her furniture moving today.

We've been communicating on a yellow note pad. My messages have been detached, but not unkind. Sometimes they reveal my frustrations with her, but I'm friendly enough. Her messages have been extremely cold, going out of her way to distance herself. Yesterday, I noted at the end of my message that she didn't need to be so cold, what have I ever done to her? Wasn't expecting this response, but this is what she wrote back:

"I am not COLD. I respond the same way you respond to me. I take that as a sign that this is simply business for you that is why my messages are simply short and to the point. If I remember correctly, you are the one who said you were 'going dark.' So I just accepted that. Perhaps you need to take a good look at your own actions and emails and then reflect. You are not the enemy. I care for you but told me you don't need that, so I leave it there. You have NOT DONE ANYTHING TO ME so please stop saying that. Everything I do these days you paint it with a veil of negativity and animosity. Even if I wrote a one million dollars check these days to you, you will still say I'm cold and not me. Well know that I am still the same E, but unfortunately, I cannot love you the way you want me to. Stop saying things to yourself and others that I am different. I am NOT. Maybe it's your way of coping with and to cover your embarrassment that I left you. That's fine, you can use that story, if that helps!!!"

Hmm. What to make of all that? Does this warrant a response of any kind? Or should I just "stay dark?"