Partner left after 9 yrs - reconciled now married!

[Dawn of Hope]

Ali, I'm sure you are very busy right now, but for whenever you have a chance to rejoin us, I wanted to add my congratulations and best wishes! Hope you are finding parenthood all that you wanted it to be.

For anyone else reading: Does anyone know what Ali's baby's actual birth date was? I'll bet Ali will be on here talking about the astrological ramifications eventually <grin>, but if someone can tell us the birth date before that, I for one would like to know.

[AliSuddenly]

Hello girls! (and DR )

Thanks for all your kind thoughts...wow its been a while hey since I've been here!

Little Daisy Anja was born via the sunroof, 20th June at 7.19 am.

Yep Mish and who else was asking.. an 80 hour labour!! 3 days and nights in labour at home from Thursday with contractions continously and then, when I couldnt take it anymore.. we transferred to hospital early hours of Saturay morning. I just wanted some gas and air or something, but they said I had to be induced by drip and so they artificially broke my waters at 6am. The drip arrived midday and I was doing ok with just my yoga breathing and moves still, until they turned the dial up on the drip and then I felt like I was being murdered !! Well, I was on the drip for 22 hours and had to have an epidural for 18 of that and after all of that.. the baby still wasnt coming.

So, after 80 hours, I had to have a cesearean Monday morning. I didnt mind though, it was the easiest bit! I recovered well from it too, I stopped taking pain killers on the 4th day and on the 6th I went on a 2 mile walk down to the sea and back up a 1 in 3 hill ! (I may have over done that though!!). My scar healed fine and really, I was very lucky to get over it so fast.

Dawn..shes a Gemini with an Aquarius moon...and she does have some negative stuff in her chart (Saturn in 4th house, moon in 8th house of death and Sun in the 12th)..which point to her losing me or H early in life through separation of some kind, divorce, illness or death! It really is such bad omens that after I saw it (sneaked a peek at her chart online when she was 3 ays old)..that it made me depressed and cry for the first 3 weeks of her life , well that and hormones.

So breastfeeding was REALLY REALLY hard.. but I am still managing to do it after 7 weeks . She is very good, except she wont go down asleep unless we hold her first until shes fast asleep.. (any tips appreciated!) and she doesnt sleep in the evenings (like now!) and is awake and fretful until about 10.30 pm each night. She does sleep quite well at night though and regularly sleeps 3 1/2 hours at a stretch and then another 2 and 1 oe 2 after that.. which doesnt sound much, but I feel ok on it !

Its amazing to have a baby with H, after all these years and all that happened.. and he has been incredible, a rock and so loving and kind to us both. He is a natural with her too and had 3 weeks off work when he was up with me at every feed helping me and helping to settle her to sleep. Since being back at work he still helps every night if I need it, or takes her off me and lets me go back to sleep, even if its 3, 4 , 5 am and he has to get up for work at 7. He says why wouldnt he, its his baby too and he doesnt want me to be too tired to look after her in the day. He is also doing pretty much all the laundry and housework and most of the cooking becuase I just dont get time as breastfeeding is so time consuming. He is amazing and I feel very blessed and lucky to be with him doing this.

But then I always knew he would be, which is why I was 100% committed to him when we were apart and determined to reconcile hey.

I will catch up with you all and looking forward to reading how you are all doing.. if you are all still posting. Its been awhile hey

Al xxx

[mishka422]

Ali!!!!! Everything just sounds wonderful!

Babies can be such a bonding experience. It's wonderful to hear that he is taking such an active role in caring for her. A lot of dad's don't do that especially when there is breast feeding involved.

As far as having a hard time getting her on a schedule, I only have one suggestion. My MIL gave me this suggestion because Marc was horribly coliky when he was about 1 month old but it had a wonderful side effect.....brew some chammomile tea, put a tiny bit of honey or sugar in it (sugar is best as honey is not suggested for infants), water it down to about half stregth and put in a bottle for her. About 2oz in the evening and it may help her sleep.

[MichelleLT]

It is so great to see you aren't on here much, but great to hear from you at the same time.

Glad you and H and Daisy Anja are doing well!

As for what you said about her being completely asleep, I assume you mean you can't put her down when she's just dozing or she wakes back up? If so, a lot of times it's the temperature change that wakes them cuz they are snuggled up to you and then you pull them away from your body heat and it startles them as they have a difficult time regulating their own temperature. My parents alternated sleeping with us, especially when we were super little, and putting a blanket on the front as well as the back when rocking us so they could lay us down without getting a cold draft. The co-sleeping definitely worked better of the two lol.

[kat727]

Oh so happy for your little family! Yes it can be very wearing in the beginning. I was blessed that all of mine slept through the night at 9 weeks but many babies take longer. My first couldn't be put down until he was totally kncked out. It took several months to get him on a regular routine. He turned out fine and is about to turn 19!

Ask about anything and I will help if I can. kat

[MynameisMZ]

ALI! I'm heading out the door to get to work, but I just wanted to quickly say to not fret too much about the sleeping etc. Just enjoy her little body. I'd give anything to go back in time and be able to hold my babies. Now they are all over 6 feet tall and heading off here and there, very busy with their own lives.

One funny story: I'd go in and get my little Gemini (my last baby) and bring him into our bed to feed him. He hadn't even woken up to be fed, I just knew it would fly by because of the others. My aunt asked me, "Are you nuts?!" Nope. Glad I did it and remember it!

[AliSuddenly]

Thanks girls, great advice.. she's still waking every 3 hours through the night.. always 2.20 and 5.20 am then 7.20 am. She is going down by 9 now, and has the tiniest top up at 10.30, so cant really complain but its definetly not enough sleep !! She's pretty good though. I just need to crack this putting her down without having to hold her first for 25 minutes !!

Mish - we are giving a bottle of formula now at night, 2 ozs ish and that seems to zonk her out !!

Michelle - We have tried the blanket on the back thing before putting her down and it definetly helps.. but we still have to hold her for 20 mins! Its a bummer, but I hope we can wean her off it soon.

So wierd to be posting here about this stuff !! I guess me and H's R is just ticking along now we have a baby. I was worried abou the effect on our R, but I've somewhat got over that now. We are being very sociable since we had her (yes we call her Daisy, Anja is her middle name Mish).. and making sure it doesnt stop us seeing friends. We had friends for dinner last night, another couple coming tonoght and then a barbecue for 16 friends on Saturday as its H's birhtday Sunday.. to be honest its almost a bit much really, its been a social whirl since she was 3 weeks old, lol !

Thanks to all my friends here

[kat727]

The best advice is rest when she does. I am not a happy girl without enough sleep. All told I have been sleep deprived for just about 19 years!

It is funny how as a Mom you can tell which child is coughing, who just got up in the middle of the night type of thing. Now I worry about them getting home safe from work or from girlfriends house. My second will be learning to drive soon and then my hair should turn totally white!!

Enjoy! Big hugs, kat

[MichelleLT]

Don't push weaning her off anything sweetie. She'll get there all on her own.

Before you know it she'll be sleeping through the night on her own and won't need you around.

Cherish the time you have to hold her. Pretty soon she'll be too big!

[MichelleLT]

Wish I could edit, but I'll just add, sounds like her love language is PT.

If you need your hands free to do other things, just buy a wrap or a front carrier. There is something about the warmth of being held and being able to hear your heartbeat that is irreplaceable to babies.