Move over... I 'm moving back......

[BobbiJo]

Hey SC--

Awesome the kids ran the Turkey Trot with you! Sorry it was so hard doing the decorating...the kids and I did the small (4') tree in their room last night. I didn't even think about H really, sadly he had distanced himself from doing some of that stuff in the past few years, anyway...

Even though you would rather live in FL, I imagine it DID sting that he didn't ask you to stay, even if it were about him seeing the kids more...that stinks.

Glad you liked the book! I read it and underlined a lot, will have to review it once I am officially back in the 'dating game' again...I had a lunch/meetup with an old college friend over the weekend. He had texted for 3 days to find a time we could get together and talk and then texted me within 20 minutes after lunch to say how much he enjoyed it. I had almost forgotten what it was like to have a guy actually pay attention to me!

Take care as you go through the financial stuff. Isn't that coming up soon?

[sandycay]

The financials will be the week before Christmas... Merry Christmas, right.

You know BBJ..... when my daughter is a little older I am gonna let her read it. I so recommend it to anyone in the dating pool.

So everyone has an acronym for someone new so here's mine: FFG
(Fine firefighter guy)

You know BBJ.. I hear ya about being able to tell if someone is into you or not. Really put into perspective how NOT into me STBXH was. It's the little things that mean so much.

How's your Day
Let me know you made it safe
It was nice to spend time with you

Let me be clear in that I am not involved in a relationship nor will I be for awhile. I just want someone to show me the respect I show them and that I don't give a darn what they do out of my line of site. Its' so nice to not have the heavy drama and 24/7 thoughts of STBXH worrying and wondering. I know now I could never, ever trust him. He is broken... maybe forever. But that is not my problem anymore.

I am so glad to be refocusing more on my kids and on myself without worrying all the time. They've been jipped slightly with my involvement trying to make this marriage work.

It's been three years since MLC began and 2 years since the 1st bomb and 1 year since he called her for closure... and this year he left... always around the same time.

I think he suffers from SADD disorder on top of the other issues.

Gambling is becoming a problem

[Kalni]

I am tempted to get the book but I think it will bad for me now. So I am keeping away.
Things are going fast in your sitch now huh?

I hope you stay focused and strong. You are going to need it. Somehow, I dont doubt you are...
xxxxxxxxx
K

[vivienne]

That is how I feel Totally agree!!!

[sandycay]

Hi all,

Just got back from a weekend away. On the down-low. An old high school BF friend has a condo a few states away and we met up with some old school people for fun times.

What a fun time. I met with people I haven't seen in 30 years and got to see my "crush" from middle school. He was my first kiss at a 7th grade dance. So fun I took old pictures from all of us that I had and it was great watching everyones reactions.

OSC (old school crush) is single and the father of (3) he had custody but they are now grown and he has a grand daughter. Plus he is still crush worthy. So will be staying in contact with him. *sighs*

I didn't share with H were I was going ..nor the kids... I didnt' want to put them in them in the middle

I guess it was a rough weekend for my son who was busy with HS activities and church activities this weekend... coincidence that both big weekends for both places.

Anyway, it seems my H told my son "I think something fishy is going on up at that church" "What is some PR!CK trying to become your father at that school or church"

Also, told my son the it was his job to clean the garage now. My H left it a mess when he left. It was clean the whole time he was gone the 1st time... and he got mad at son and made him walk to bus stop in the dark in 22 degrees with only mintues to get there. He is so hostile towards the boy. He also said "you just like being at that church because your not accountable for anything there"

uughghh S is an honor student ... a sophmore taking senior level classes... no electives... pre-cal, Honors english and world studies, Chemistry, Spanish 2, and health. He's an A/B student. He also swims on the VARSITY swim team although he is only a sophmore. He volunteers running the sound boatd for the children's ministrys at church and is active in his own youth group. Never been in trouble. All my adult friends, people at the church, his teachers have nothing but praise for this young man. He is always happy go lucky. He does have some issues in getting homework done but that's it.

Why does H seem to need to hate and berate him. It makes me so mad and sad.

[smith18]

Your H being a dick to your son has to make it so much easier for you to be done with him. And you have every right to be mad. Teenage kids have it tough enough (especially with your son's load) and dont need a father berating them.

That sounds awesome about meeting your first kisser. I bet he can kiss a whole lot better now too!

[Kalni]

Sometimes we push away those we hurt exactly because we hate hurting them and we cant have them be loving to us. I've seen it happen many many times. It still is stupid.
K

[sandycay]

Your H being a dick to your son has to make it so much easier for you to be done with him. And you have every right to be mad. Teenage kids have it tough enough (especially with your son's load) and dont need a father berating them.

That sounds awesome about meeting your first kisser. I bet he can kiss a whole lot better now too!

Kerry, you want to line up and let me know? LOL He does have a goatee (sp?) now that he didnt' have in middle school. Plus that was just a sweet kiss on the lips way back then... but his lips were still as soft when he kissed me hello on the cheek and goodbye on the lips. AND unlike BBJ's first date kiss.... I didn't want to throw up...

30 years since we have seen each other... amazing.



I am glad you said that about H... it's so true. It's weird..in that it can't get any easier to get done with him because I am done with him. 100 percent and I am ok with it where ever the chips may fall. All this crap he does to my son when he just had a fellow classmate commite suicide is crazy. There are 3 boys in that family and two of the boys have done this. You know how these things carry over in HS.... but can't convince H that's it's a tough time for the boy.


Toot Toot.... there goes the crazy train and guess who is the conductor?

[sandycay]

Sometimes we push away those we hurt exactly because we hate hurting them and we cant have them be loving to us. I've seen it happen many many times. It still is stupid.
K

So true K, I'll never understand it and I am glad it's not in my DNA to do it. I see how miserable the people are that do this type of thing.

[Arwen_in_NJ]

Hi all,

Also, told my son the it was his job to clean the garage now. My H left it a mess when he left. It was clean the whole time he was gone the 1st time... and he got mad at son and made him walk to bus stop in the dark in 22 degrees with only mintues to get there. He is so hostile towards the boy. He also said "you just like being at that church because your not accountable for anything there"

IMO, your H is projecting anger at S because the SON is being responsible, and the H is NOT. Your H is rejecting all his adult, responsible roles- and the S is painfully reminding him of that. Hence the anger and resentment.

Just my 2.