I was at the mall with my daughters today and got a call on my cell. It was a sheriff telling me he had my "ticket to freedom"
He was at my house and I wan't there so he told me he would come to the mall... I was served in front of my daughters and I am totally humiliated. Called H and basically told him he is a piece of sh&t!! In my state the plantiff is notified before the defendant gets served...H had promised me he would tell me when papers were coming. Worse yet...the preliminary agreement that H wants is... the house my van me to pay his court/attorney fees keep him on health ins. can't sell anything or damage anything in the house...does he really think I would do that!!!WTF My L is on vacation until Tues....I am sick over this...I guess I didn't feel like it would ever come to this....it has only been 3 months since we seperated! HELP
I am so sorry. Do you think maybe h asked for so much because he does not want this to go smoothly. Don't be surprised if he drags his heels. They all seem to.
Don't be discouraged sometimes they need the d to get them to the other side of this. There has to be an ending for there to be a new beginning. It is just a piece of paper.
In the meantime, protect yourself and your children.
I'm so sorry to hear that momof2girls. That was a terrible thing for him to do that to you infront of your daughters. They are his daughters as well, what is he thinking, or not thinking. You have my deepest sympathy. Why is he asking for so much? That's crazy. Take care, 4
WOW! That was awfully quick! I'm sorry for his lack of maturity to handle things correctly. I am going to assume you do not live in a 50/50 state or that you are the major breadwinner in the family, as it seems he is asking for alot. Please try to stay calm and focused until your atty returns and do not let im get to you. It will only reward him.
Wishing you the best and keep us posted.
Jeanette
Change the Policy. Allow PM's Free all of us.
Also some new and improved emoticons would be nice!
I'm so sorry. That is just MEAN to have you served in front of the kids and by the sheriff!!!! Why didn't he just have the papers served to your L? And I can't believe the sheriff said he had your "ticket to freedom"!!!!
I think mermaid is right. Sometimes they HAVE to get D. It is a piece of paper and sometimes people to get remarried after D. Don't lose faith.
My D-14 has a friend that her parents had divorced years ago only to get remarried a couple of years later. It happens. I don't know the details of what happened but even if it wasn't MLC, they parted for some reason and then decided that they needed to be together.
It was wrong what H did to you. I do agree with what the others said that it may have to go to D for him to get back to where he belongs. I believe this especially to be true to MLCers.
My prayers are with you and your children. And I pray for your H to realize the mistake he is making.
Me:56, W:51 D:26,S:24,S:22 Married:18 Bomb 9/27/06 Separated 11/27/06 Divorced 10/6/08 Leaving it up to God
I'm so sorry you were served in public in front of your daughters. This just confirms how amazingly self-centered they are. I honestly don't think they "intend" to hurt us, they literally just don't think of the impact on us at all.
Anyway, I'm sorry. Like the other posters, I don't understand why he would ask for so much, unless he is just posturing.
I know it is different in every state. but in my experience, this whole D process goes much slower than you think it will. And you actually have more time to respond to things than it seems. So please take you time, try to enjoy your weekend. Early next week you'll be able to get with your L.
morning all, I really don't think we will ever get back together! He has totally moved on with OW and abandoned his family. I am on the fast track to D....I think H asked for so much so he can bargain with me. His L is known to be aggressive, low class and goes for the money. Has anyone thought of my children???????????????????? I only let H have it for a bit yesterday...I did not want to say to much b/c I did not want to let on that what was in the papers bothered me!! I am hoping most of it is form letter stuff...I can't imagine H even thinking I would ever spend all the $$ or sell his stuff!!! its in the papers!!!! I am trying and have been very dignified...I have not talked about him poorly, I have not spread rumors, I have not caused any problems at all!! H is the one causing all this drama...there is no need for it and it makes me look bad!! He ruined my Christmas and now he is ruining my D5 bday party today....when will I feel better???????????????
Mom, I'm sorry that you were served and especially at the mall in front of your children. I hope today will be a better day for you.
Unfortunately, what you read in the papers is not "form letter" stuff. It's what your h told the lawyer to write up. If you go back and re-read what he's requested, you'll see that it's not the type of information that comes from a sane person. What person would state not to damage the home? I have to agree w/Mermaid on the fact that this is his avenue to drag things out.
BTW, there's not much room for negotiating w/an mlcer. You will have to stand your ground and do not waffle on anything that you need or want, especially for your children. Your h may come back and promise you the moon, but please, do not buy into that.
snodderly, He wants my house!!! and my car!!! but no mention of the kids except for joint custody! SOOO I am supposed to live in a tent and ride a bike with two carseats attached to work everyday????
This is not my H talking...MLC or not he is being a ahole. I really don't think he wants to drag things out because he would have waited to file!
I was literally dropped like a hot potato...we STILL haven't had any talk about our R....how does someone do that after 10 years and 2 kids....and I helped him raise my stepsons and because of me those boys were given the world!! This is the thanks I get???
Being served like that was the most humiliating thing that has ever happened to me...I am a good person and have tried my best to give H the space he needed and all he has done is spread rumors and make me look like a terrible peron.. it hurts soooooo much...ugh here I go crying again!
