Not sure how far I'll get on this...Charlotte is sleeping but has been for a while and will likely wake up wanting food and mom (same package!) soon! She's doing great...eating up a storm -- up to 9lbs from 5 in just 6 weeks. Now, if ONLY she would sleep at night for longer than 2.5 hours. I'm tired but it's mostly in the background. I think my body is used to it but my brain sure isn't.
I really, really want to find some time to put down some goals. Things at home with h are good but definitely more strained than a year ago...hard not to be when you've had a difficult pregnancy and now a newborn. We're mostly handling things with good humor eventually but there ARE moments when in the heat of it I think we want to bop each other over the head. There's so many things that are frustrating/tiring/go wrong with a baby in the house that it's easy to pass judgement/apply blame to the other even when it has nothing to do with anything they've done..add a heavy dose of tiredness and it's not hard to imagine short tempers.
I know it all comes back to fundamentals for me...heck, if I could find the time to read my "best of" threads I know that I would find the guidelines...apply kindness liberally, don't ASSume, act "as if" -- hey, aren't the "rules" in my signature? Maybe that's enough!
I know my goals will fall into my usual "one for me, one for my M, one for h" routine...
For me:
1. Start taking diet and exercise more seriously again -- the wonders of breastfeeding have gotten me practically down to my normal weight but I'd like to be a bit more disciplined.
2. Find some time each day for me -- even if it's only 15 minutes in the bathtub!
For h: 1. Attack one area of clutter each day (note that this does NOT use up my 15 minutes of me time!)
2. Keep on top of dishes, laundy -- these ARE very doable
3. Try to figure out how to actually get some cooking done
For my M: 1. Work on getting h's LL spoken -- quality time together.
2. Work on increasing PI
3. Address impatience with h (warranted or not) and apply M&V techniques. Remember that h is trying every day to do his best and that he feels out of his element. Work on including him more.
Each of these need to be fleshed out with actual actions...next post.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Great goals, there, gf! I'm amazed that you can be so focused at a time like this!
I just really want to affirm the M&V stuff as you talk to your H. This is one of the things I learned with my SO, and where I know I failed miserably the first time around. Praise, praise, praise. Every time H does something you appreciate, let him know, in short, sweet, simple and direct terms.
"H, thank you so much for picking up the nappies on your way home from work!"
"It was so helpful of you to fold that load of laundry."
Quote: A regular exercise schedule would probably also help with the tiredness and help even out any moodiness.
yes. I was a dedicated exerciser pre baby and want to get back to it but it's harder than I thought with a new one...she's too young for the gym daycare and the weather isn't always conducive here for outdoor stuff. BUT, we're doing well this week!
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Hi Sage- I'm over on the MLC board but I track your threads whenever I can. I just wanted to drop you a quick note because I'm home with a new baby too. Mine will be 7 weeks this Saturday. This is my second but my oldest is 4 years old so I seem to have forgotten all my tricks! Plus this baby is different than my first one. He wants to be held all the time! And he's sleeping in bed with us. Not quite sure how that happened (or how I got the first one to sleep in a crib) but it's working for now.
If you want to compare notes, my email is whats_next05@hotmail.com. I also find lots of solace and advice over on the babycenter website.
Good luck to you! You've got the right toolkit to make sure that you are successful with all of this!!
