Is looking back helping you identify what works for you? Or possibly helping you to finally lay ghosts from the past to rest?
I am sorry, but I did not totally follow your previous thread only partially, so I was wondering what your goals are for doing the looking back? Hope you don't mind my asking.
Have a wonderful day and as Odga says, "Keep Smiling"
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
I am sorry, but I did not totally follow your previous thread only partially, so I was wondering what your goals are for doing the looking back? Hope you don't mind my asking.
Of course I don't mind you asking! (I was gonna insert a statement in here about being DISMAYED! that you haven't followed every freakin' word of my last thread with rigor but figured you might not see it as a joke!! )
Here's what my stated goals were: One of the things I'd been planning to do for a while was compile the "stuff that worked" from my threads. Why? Well, partly because I feel like I did have good success and want to remember what the keys were...and partly because I sometimes get amazed when I find myself stuck in the "same old" sitch again and partly because I'm often awestruck when I realize the tremendous advice I have received from so many people here...
It's been an interesting read, Pam. First of all, it's been a way to visit with old friends. It's funny to see when people first showed up on my threads -- some of them long gone now. Secondly, it's helped me to remember that I did work quite hard at DB'ing. There are times when I feel like it's all been "a fluke" and while I realize that there are many people on the boards who have DB'd to the nth degree w/o reconciling their M's, it's been comforting to see that I did "get it" and "use it" and reap benefits from it. Reminding myself of the techniques I used to identify 180s, etc, has been very helpful. And, then, it's also been good to see the places that I STILL get stuck and the cycles that I go 'round and 'round in at times. Helps me identify some areas to strengthen, you know? And, finally, I wanted a concise way to be able to go back and see "what worked" and the themes are consistent from the very beginning -- time spent together, managing my own "stuff", no expectations or ASSumptions, appreciating, etc. Heck, it's the stuff in my signature!!!
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Quote: (I was gonna insert a statement in here about being DISMAYED! that you haven't followed every freakin' word of my last thread with rigor but figured you might not see it as a joke!! )
I believe I would have understood you were joking.
I found it difficult to join you on your journey. It somehow brought up painful memories for me. That is why I haven't followed you. I actually expect and intend to read it some day as I like your logical thinking and sometimes things you have had to overcome are things I also need to deal with in my life.
I think your goals sound very good then.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
h had his first exam yesterday (his second is in an hour!). He's working so hard and seems to be holding up under the stress.
I left work early yesterday and ran some errands. He came home earlier than I expected so I was caught a little unawares -- I had planned to make myself look a bit prettier, etc, before I saw him (I've been feeling like such a schlump lately) so that combined with a raging case of PMS (answering the "is she or isn't she" question firmly in the negative) led to me bursting into tears over dinner. h was awesome and very protective of me the rest of the night.
I may leave early again today and see if I can get some stuff done. We're hosting h's family's xmas party on Sunday and it feels like there's a lot to do before then. Plus, work is bugging me to no end so there's a doubly good reason to bolt. h invited me on a "date" for tonight -- not sure what we'll do but I know the company will be good.
Does anyone know how to get olive oil off of denim? My lunch (pasta) was tasty but also quite messy.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Just wanted to thank you for your journaling and insights. They're a great reminder of Michele's point that relationships need attention and to be nurtured. You've inspired and motivated me to continue a solution journal and to note positives and the things that work.
Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there. Will Rogers
To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. C. S. Lewis
that you haven't followed every freakin' word of my last thread with rigor but figured you might not see it as a joke!! 
)
