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For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Card29 V by Card29 @ Yesterday at 11:37 AM

Thanks, as well, ganb8te. I was trying to 2x4 myself, but yours is more accurate to how I would feel if I was not a complete wreck.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need help 3 by Jefe @ Yesterday at 11:34 AM

I know it's tough, Lost. But you need to look at things differently. Make a gratitude list every morning with at least 3 things on it. I've got an app on my phone that prompts me each morning to journal what I'm grateful for. The first thing you can
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife walked away (4 months ago now) thread 3 by BigMac @ Yesterday at 11:34 AM

Mozza, thanks for the clarification. Suffice it to say, its a long complicated story about how and when we broke up. After this is over I should write a book about it.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: standing for me by Maybell @ Yesterday at 11:32 AM

Only thing that makes you a bad DBer is if you don't grow and learn through this experience. Be well, Ahoy.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Living life...My future self will thank me. by Rick1963 @ Yesterday at 11:29 AM

I think that we are so involved in trying to save our M that we forget who we are/were. The rejection is so painful that we beg and plea for them to change their mind. We forget at times that we werent happy either. We get really lost. This is a real
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need help 3 by lostluv @ Yesterday at 11:28 AM

I know eventually I will be fine. I cannot give up hope on my marriage until it is OVER. Otherwise I'm giving up. I'm starting to release the expectation that comes w the hope....that's not easy. This morning was pleasant , and I even made her
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: Need help. Scared, confused pt 3 by Jefe @ Yesterday at 11:23 AM

W's reply to the apology text I sent last night: W: Thank you, I know they do. I will see them before work. I'll come over before I go to the church
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Edz - continuing to move forward by edz @ Yesterday at 11:14 AM

Originally Posted By: jim0987You sound melancholy. Don't worry things will get better When you do your envisioning try it as what kind if person you want to be rather than what your situation will be. Imagine some of the kinds of situations you woul
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: standing for me by Ahoy @ Yesterday at 11:14 AM

I don't know, ganb8te. I guess I am thinking in really black-and-white terms. But yes, if I move back to my home state, I would have no reason to move back to be near STBXH. All my work contacts, friends, and family are there. Everyone I love. I don'
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Card29 V by Jefe @ Yesterday at 11:10 AM

Thank you ganb8te, that was just the wording I was looking for. That has bothered me too.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: standing for me by ganb8te @ Yesterday at 11:07 AM

Hi Ahoy, Does the move have to be forever? The way that you are talking it sounds like once it's done, everything gets negotiated and that's it. I'm wondering if there is a middle ground?
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need help 3 by Ahoy @ Yesterday at 11:06 AM

lost, some folks to encourage hope. I would say -- have hope for yourself, but don't invest hope in another person because you can't count on what they are going to do or choose. The great thing about having hope for yourself -- that you'll find peac
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Edz - continuing to move forward by edz @ Yesterday at 11:04 AM

Hi following on from the above, firstly I should point out i raise none, absolutely none of this kind of issue in front of W, a calm PMA is all thats shown and I remain calm, happy, balanced and occasionally funny thats it. Second Im looking for a
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Claire-- Is DB Worth it? Part 8 by Ahoy @ Yesterday at 11:02 AM

Me too, Claire! It's a great feeling, isn't it? I hope it lasts.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: (NA) There's a tear in my beer... by Ahoy @ Yesterday at 11:00 AM

It will get easier, Dawn! It just takes time and patience. Question: If he moved out, why is he cooking dinner at your house? Can you have a little more space from him? That will help you. I can tell you it gets easier because I got the bomb-drop
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Do I walk away from WAW? (2) by South74 @ Yesterday at 11:00 AM

Originally Posted By: jim0987That might be the case but that highlights that she has her own issues to deal with. If your keeping on top of the house then what's wrong with that its certainly better than it being an unpleasant environment. If you d
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Card29 V by ganb8te @ Yesterday at 11:00 AM

Originally Posted By: Card29Latest entry into my personal journal: "Your old M is dead. There is no guarantee of a new one with WAW. Your M is only a piece of paper at this point." Is this the healthiest mentality for me to seek? I kn
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Walk away wife after 22 years part 2 by South74 @ Yesterday at 10:58 AM

Originally Posted By: edzCant wait to get back to my swimming, havent been able to while I had the bug thats been kicking me for two weeks now and I really have felt the difference in my mood! Got to try and smash 80 lengths mate . I try swimming
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Edz - continuing to move forward by jim0987 @ Yesterday at 10:54 AM

You sound melancholy. Don't worry things will get better When you do your envisioning try it as what kind if person you want to be rather than what your situation will be. Imagine some of the kinds of situations you would have handled badly and envi
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Raliced - Climbing Without a Rope by Ahoy @ Yesterday at 10:49 AM

Sorry about all that, raliced. Lisa is just a symptom, so don't waste any energy thinking about her, although it's terrible to think that your kids have to be around her. If you're lucky, she will turn out to be a good person and be a positive force
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell XVI by Ahoy @ Yesterday at 10:44 AM

Maybell, please don't let his looks make you think that things have changed. My H gives me those looks all the time, but it's because he is feeling guilt and pity. After all, he is sleeping with someone else. Of course he's sad about breaking up the
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Newcomer With Hope by ganb8te @ Yesterday at 10:36 AM

Originally Posted By: LittleFrustrated by all the defense I'll never get out. I've validated his feelings and admitted to my crap but some of his accusations are false and unfair. Hi Little, Thanks for dropping by my thread the other day. I'm on t
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: (NA) There's a tear in my beer... by Dawn70 @ Yesterday at 10:31 AM

Another morning of waking up alone and crying. This HAS to get easier. Our 9th anniversary is a week from today. . That is weighing very heavily on me. H told his mom and sis about our S yesterday. He was at our house when I got home from work,
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Edz - continuing to move forward by edz @ Yesterday at 10:30 AM

Self indulgent journalling again, sorry! Lousy, lousy night. The weather was very windy and it sounded like tiles were going to get removed at times. Everything was weighing heavilly on me as well, by 3am gave up and carried on and finished my break
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Claire-- Is DB Worth it? Part 8 by ganb8te @ Yesterday at 10:22 AM

Originally Posted By: claire7 I'm stronger, happier, more confident, more at peace than perhaps ever in my life. Pretty powerful stuff. I hope you frame that and put it up on your wall, Claire!
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