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Hi Kramer, I read your post above and thought - uh o - bad idea... Just because OM is still on the scene somewhere and your W doesn't sound as though she has woken up. Yes, you may have enjoyed it - but do you really want to become OM to her OM? I
Thanks for the advice CaliGuy. I'll have to think on this. I certainly get what you're saying and I agree it certainly won't work if she thinks shes being tricked. We have gone to MC a couple times, but I'm not really sure if there's any benefit r
I'm so glad you are going to counseling sessions. My own counseling (& these boards & Alanon) have been so helpful for me in learning not to be hard on myself. Learning how to let go and not beat myself up over every decision... wow its cha
Hi OD, my H didn't acknowledge my birthday at all last November. Or our anniversary last August. That was horrible too... I can understand your anger RD. I haven't been that angry in my sitch, but I can understand people being so angry. But I think
I actually cried for the first time about any of this yesterday... and she came into the room and saw me. Hated that, did not want her to see it. But you are right... I do need to grieve. I will choose my time and place more carefully next time.
Hi OD Do you see an I/C ? I get your anger mate but it's not healthy for you You're right W has hurt you badly , she's broken your trust , you've lost your best friend and she's rejected to. Sshe done all that a while ago now and your doing i
And what are your kids leaning from you? To hold a grudge forever and harbor hate and resentment until you become old and bitter? Those kids have your genes, too, you know. Model something better for them.
Originally Posted By: Old Dog I wish I'd never met her. I'm so sorry my kids have got her flakey genes and will learn it's OK to abandon your marriage without a second thought. Damn I hate her. Hate to say this but if you never met her you would not
I do want to add one more thing. I've posted a lot about what I've learned about how to act and be around your W. But it's also important for you to work through the feelings that you have. Your W has fired you! That [censored]. It hurts. It's sad.
If my approach fails miserably, you are free to say "I told you so". I keep coming back to what you wrote about it taking 5 minutes or no more than 24 hours to decide if you want to give you marriage it all. I think it took longer than t
Yes Nick, that list is amazing. WW really are a dime a dozen, aren't they? It's affirming to see how these are pathological behaviors common to all of them. I am encouraged by the support and the stories here. I really feel hopeless today, and this
BECLem-reading up on your sitch and i have a similar sitch. Im not sure if W is in a EA or not, but i have come to the conclusion that whether or not she is in one shouldnt matter to me and how i am going to change. it really hard not to think abou
Thanks for some sort of perspective SunnyB. But it wasn't a happy birthday, it was just a good birthday. She knows it won't be happy. I've been mad as hell on and off for months and I can't kick it. It's driving me nuts. I want to scream in her stup
Ralphy. I laid down a no contact boundary between S9 and the OM when the WW was pushing for them to meet. I did is smart though. We were exchanging documents on a separation agreement and I waited until I had my with a L. I wrote up the no contact in
Originally Posted By: Kembo05Yeah, I am HOPING the A is over; I know contact has been very minimal but I do think that "mourning" process is going to take some time. I have definitely taken my hits, I don't know if I need a spew jacket or
DifRent- Here is some really good insight from a really good vet, Sandi about WAW and what they are feeling. Keep these close to you and review them. Im going through the same type of sitch with my WAW. It so hard. ive only been her for two month
Originally Posted By: HuddyThanks. Didn't want to sound glib or anything. SIL is priming W into actions she wouldn't normally take. The L for example. Even though I was at the hotel that week, my SD was at home and told me what was going on. So,
OD, honey, take a deep breath. So she said happy birthday. What did you want her to do? Ignore you? Order you a stripper cake? I have a feeling that no matter what she chose, you'd take issue with it. Let it go, OD.
Originally Posted By: UpnorthThat's what's great about family and friends, they often offer there services without being asked. Which was the case for us. Actually people without much connection at all thought they should butt in. They all do, and t
Kramer-im glad you feel good about yourself, especially after these past six months. it seems like its a good thing, but i have a feeling based on what i have read, that it mightve not been a good idea to do that but I am wondering what the vets thi
DifRent - I think the general advice on that is to treat them like you would a friendly neighbor. Engage when they talk with you. Smile. Be pleasant. But don't give out more information than you need to and don't hang on to conversations.