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For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by labug @ Yesterday at 10:38 AM

I hope my threads are helpful but I don't remember everything that's there. It's been a long time. I think I was so unsettled in convos with H because I had many expectations about how it "should" be. When I was able to let him be who he wa
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Taking it day by day part 2 by Maybell @ Yesterday at 10:37 AM

I think it's nice he was able to be in your presence and be pleasant. In that moment. I've been reading labug's old threads and there was something this morning that really resonated for me: If your only reason for being here is to "Save My M
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife wants marriage with OM, is there any hope? by claire7 @ Yesterday at 10:29 AM

Mindin, I am no vet at all, but you are getting GREAT advice and questions from vets (MrBond, and 25yrs), and it doesn't sound like you are really listening to them. Originally Posted By: mindsinMrBond - The things I've done were done years ago.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife walked aways (two months ago now) new thread by BigMac @ Yesterday at 10:28 AM

Question, I was talking through the situation with one of my friends and he pointed out a behavior that the W was showing. First, when we sat down she found a flaw on my face (a straight hair on my beard and asked if she could pull it). From what
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Ready for some forum help by MLP @ Yesterday at 10:28 AM

NewB3 I'm glad you've found time to read the books. I only read them and refer to them when H is out of town, otherwise they're tucked away where prying eyes can't see them. So - I get it! This forum is also a great resource! I think you've mad
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Ready for some forum help by NewB3 @ Yesterday at 10:25 AM

That take care of wifes needs above...that is NOT a backslide. I simply treat her no different ..."as if" I just , as part of 180 do more around the house. I make no mention of those things. I ask for nothing in return. She does offer as of
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: what do I do... by recng @ Yesterday at 10:25 AM

So you confronted your W about communicating with OM and she lied about it again? I know you haven't told her how you know, but don't you think she's catching on that it's the phone records? Back in my pre-DB days I found phone records and confront
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Finding my way - part 2 by MLP @ Yesterday at 10:23 AM

Somewhere along the way I've read that if you can just get to the other side of MLC, that those are actually the best years of our life. So - hang on! You can do this!
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Finding my way - part 2 by Meghan @ Yesterday at 10:19 AM

Maybell, thank you - you are consistently able to say things that get me to calm down, reflect, and feel better. Thank you so much for all of your words of wisdom. I'm much more up and awake now and feeling a good bit better. I need to get in some
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wife STILL in MLC but has now left #1 by TSquared2 @ Yesterday at 10:18 AM

Quote:Google Susan Anderson and Journey to Healing from Abandonment. She has a really helpful workbook that discusses the difference and helps you move through the process. In some ways, what we are experiencing is similar to what family members fee
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Ready for some forum help by NewB3 @ Yesterday at 10:17 AM

I have read both DR and DB. I have kids at home and can only read late at night when the older child goes to bed. I can do that and/or get on this forum. I drive one hour to work each way. Trying to detach....doing 180's. I have specific things that
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need Help!!! WAW stated she wants a D by BKS @ Yesterday at 10:17 AM

Keeping for posterity M46 W45 T12 M10 S9 D4 BD 2/13 DBing 4/13 IC 4/13 W sleeps D4 rm 5/13 Couples MC, W wears ring again 7/12/13 W said she wants D at MC 7/26/13 Received letter from W attorney 8/7/13, D pending
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need Help!!! WAW stated she wants a D by BKS @ Yesterday at 10:14 AM

Hello Everyone, I just wanted to stop by and update my situation. Our divorce is final. I moved out of the house about 3 months ago and I am renting a place until I can buy my own place, which I am working on as we speak. I have a couple of quest
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Need Help!!! WAW stated she wants a D by BKS @ Yesterday at 10:13 AM

Hello Everyone, I just wanted to stop by and update my situation. Our divorce is final. I moved out of the house about 3 months ago and I am renting a place until I can buy my own place, which I am working on as we speak. I have a couple of quest
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Stand and Deliver! by LoisB @ Yesterday at 10:08 AM

Thank you Job. We are going to a meeting together tonight. The last 24 hours has been a whirlwind of emotion. There's been great joy and some cathartic bouts of crying for me. D20's realization has brought up a lot of feelings/buried deep for Smokey
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Maybell: Chapter Four by Maybell @ Yesterday at 10:04 AM

I do think it's unfair and unkind of her to claim that my pain is less than her pain. Just because I don't go demanding it from the entire town doesn't mean it hurts less. Thanks for the support, BigMac and Ggrass. I do wish I could make amends t
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: 1 step forward, 1000 steps back - part 3 by mdu @ Yesterday at 10:03 AM

I'm not running to the court house to file right this minute, Starsky. I won't make any decisions until I have more information than just mind reading. Just in a bad place with things.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Raine post by GoatGal @ Yesterday at 09:56 AM

Her posts have been inspirational.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Raine post by artsy @ Yesterday at 09:54 AM

Wow. Just...wow. I'm not finished with all of them, but she showed amazing strength. I am embarrassed at my insecurities and weakness in my sitch compared to what she went through. Unbelievable! She deserves unparalleled happiness. Great to see a '
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: Saving my marriage by focusing on ME! by Starsky309 @ Yesterday at 09:53 AM

Originally Posted By: MaybellOx, you should really, really listen to GabbysMom. You are on the wrong track. Totally agree. In all my time on these boards (which is a LOT), I don't think I've ever seen another poster combine so much PASSIVITY wi
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Eyes on the prize... by artsy @ Yesterday at 09:50 AM

Ggrass, of course it does! If you think about it, how would they be expected to act considering what has happened. And when the LBS handles herself with grace, I'm sure it's even more embarrassing for the MLCer AND his family to see the reality of
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Finding my way - part 2 by Maybell @ Yesterday at 09:49 AM

Listen, Meghan, I'm 42, and I can tell you with absolute certainty that we are both of us in our best years now, with many more still to come. You couldn't pay me to go back to my 20s. Your fear that you wasted them is based very largely on how unhap
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wife STILL in MLC but has now left #1 by LoisB @ Yesterday at 09:47 AM

Grief from abandonment is different from grief from death. Google Susan Anderson and Journey to Healing from Abandonment. She has a really helpful workbook that discusses the difference and helps you move through the process. In some ways, what we
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Taking it day by day part 2 by T0324 @ Yesterday at 09:47 AM

I feel sad. Honestly. He is capable of being that man that I knew. But is that man always there and just doesn't want to be with me? Any thoughts would be appreciated. I don't expect anything from this. I'm way too guarded to think of this as
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: Saving my marriage by focusing on ME! by EmmaB @ Yesterday at 09:42 AM

Why is semen analysis ick? Well, I suppose it's ick in the sense of thinking about his semen on her garments, but so is an STD test ick and so is a paternity test ick. The semen test is to see if she is having sex with OM. That's a good thing to do..
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