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Forum   Subject
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: Saving my marriage by focusing on ME (Part 2) by Oxford1 @ Yesterday at 01:05 PM

Had another discussion with my DB Coach and we worked on some of my concerns and questions. I have a real strategy right now and I will be applying it the next few weeks and then touch back to see where I am. One thing I worked on was how to stop w
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: First post, DENIAL was my HAPPY PLACE!! by Shining @ Yesterday at 01:05 PM

Thank you for the encouragement, everyone. I need it more than I sometimes care to admit. Just got back from meeting with L. Disappointed, but not too surprised. I'm in a state that does not have the option for legal separation. L was a big-time
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife wants marriage with OM, is there any hope? by mindsin @ Yesterday at 01:02 PM

Gotcha. I think at this point, she's grown tired of the "I wish I could do things differently" rhetoric, so I try not to go there. I indicated that I understood simply by nodding and saying "OK".
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Taking it day by day.. Part III by JCred @ Yesterday at 12:59 PM

Quote:H textd me asking if I was working yesterday. I told him is was in meetings most of the day but had plans for the night after so he was more than welcome to come take the boys since I wouldn't be home until late. He responded that he couldn't h
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts DBing after WAW then reactive EA by me...NO QUIT! by Joe1981 @ Yesterday at 12:57 PM

Ok, time for a new thread, my old one is closing in on 100. Here's the link to the old one: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2474855&page=1 Currently things are peaceful. I'm trying for lovingly detach
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: one day at a time by twinmom @ Yesterday at 12:48 PM

At the take care clinic and get a text from H asking for roadside assistance # and then asks me to pick him up from work this evening and take him to get the Jeep because it has a flat tire and he is having it towed/fixed while he is at work.......
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: "Speak Softly": The Amoeba Whisperer! by GoatGal @ Yesterday at 12:44 PM

Still here, still processing, still in quiet mode. Never fear, I am keeping tabs on all of you! --GGG
Infidelity/Extramarital Affairs/Jealousy
Jump to new posts Re: help me i am new here by twinmom @ Yesterday at 12:44 PM

To answer your last question honestly I don't know if I would take my H back, but if you haven't read my thread(s) my H is a special kind of a$$ hole...... I would agree with Chuck, stay dark and work on yourself. Find new hobbies where you can soc
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: The gift of time . . . by Train @ Yesterday at 12:43 PM

I've learned that biting my tongue in the heat of the moment and giving myself a 24-hour cool-off period usually does the trick.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Taking it day by day.. Part III by Train @ Yesterday at 12:41 PM

Your instincts are right: don't mention that photo at all. Do not instigate. Remember: you are detached from him and his actions. Even if you're NOT, you act as if you are. Best thing to do, Taylor, is come up with a list of your non-negotiable
Piecing Our Marriage Back Together Again
Jump to new posts Re: Baby steps, patience and uncertainty by Crimson @ Yesterday at 12:36 PM

My house has been spared the ravages of the monsoon season thus far. I've had a little rain and that brings the smell of the creosote bushes to life -- one of my favorite AZ things of all time. My parents neighborhood, though, off of I17 got blaste
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: I had an affair... and I want my Fiancee back by DBinSF @ Yesterday at 12:32 PM

HOLY MOLY!!!!! She just wrote me a Happy Birthday message. What do I say?!?!?! I need some advice and wisdom on how not to F this up like every other communication we've had these last few months. She writes: "Hey, I just wanted to wish yo
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Taking it day by day.. Part III by Thornton @ Yesterday at 12:29 PM

Nope. Dont say a word. And stop looking at his FB. He is a liar, treat him as such. Don't beleive a word that comes out of his mouth.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: I had an affair... and I want my Fiancee back by DBinSF @ Yesterday at 12:28 PM

Hi all, today is my 39th birthday. The Happy Birthday wishes are pouring in over FB and text, and I'm humbled, but I also wonder what all these "friends" would think if they knew I was a cheater and a liar. I know it probably drives my E
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Wife STILL in MLC but has now left #1 by Matt165 @ Yesterday at 12:27 PM

Thanks Heather and AJ, The thing that has me the most worried is that my W comes from a family history of D. My parents are still married (55 years)and VERY few of my relatives have gone through D. The fact that I have seen how badly D has affected m
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Is DB Worth it? Part 4 by Crimson @ Yesterday at 12:26 PM

I relate 100% to everything you said above...I had the same thoughts. The thing is, the conclusion that you have drawn about living apart, your challenges, parenting....etc - HE has to discover on his own. And, and I am learning with my deal, that
Hopefulness
Jump to new posts so confused by hope224 @ Yesterday at 12:20 PM

H and I have been married for 1.5 yr, Together for almost 3 yrs. have a 5mth old now. He dropped the D bomb out of nowhere 06/20/14. wanted a divorce asap but I cant because of some visa status prob. Since then, I started a new job, got my mum to tak
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife wants marriage with OM, is there any hope? by claire7 @ Yesterday at 12:12 PM

Originally Posted By: mindsin Then she went on the offensive, saying things like: "Don't think my parents side with you. They want us to split up. They don't believe you're a fit husband for me." This maybe would have been a place to s
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Have I any hope.... (Part 3) by bashy @ Yesterday at 12:09 PM

Thanks CS. Do you think I should go back on planned trip?
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Wife wants marriage with OM, is there any hope? by mindsin @ Yesterday at 12:07 PM

Thanks claire7. Can you expand on what you mean by needing to work on validating?
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Is DB Worth it? Part 4 by claire7 @ Yesterday at 11:58 AM

labug-- you asked a great question. What's this really about. I think it is this: Our sitch feels so... unnecessary to me. My MIL has told me he is unhappy, and she is concerned about his health. (So, clearly this has not been the magical happy
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Levels of DBing by TRDiver @ Yesterday at 11:57 AM

I think that makes quite a bit of sense given that everyone has their own personalities and traits. Problem is, if we understood ourselves well and our spouses well we probably wouldn't be here, so seeking the council and advice of others and kicking
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: KGirl - post-move by labug @ Yesterday at 11:54 AM

Life gets easier when we let go of trying to control others. I found I had a lot more free time to focus on me when I could say "Hmmm, not my problem" and really mean it. Quote:labug - maybe that wasn't the best choice of words. "Refr
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Don't know what to do, fight for it or move on by TRDiver @ Yesterday at 11:40 AM

A bit of journaling, Dropped kids off with my wife this afternoon, it was friendly / cordial. I did mention it was nice to see her and she reciprocated. Did feel a bit awkward to see her, but not too bad. She invited me into her temporary place wher
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Taking it day by day.. Part III by T0324 @ Yesterday at 11:39 AM

So after our texting conversation I posted this morning he immediately posted a picture of him and OW kissing and holding hands on Facebook. Do I make a comment that we are still married and this is disrespectful or let it go as if I don't even know
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