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Hi Anjo. I don't see this the way Job does. It seems to me he's giving you info re the church is huge He didn't have to offer any of that detailed info. For me you need to pull back on the way you talk to him. There was no need for you t
Hi, I posted my situation on the newcomers board but hoped for some advice here. My h and I had been together nearly 20 years. Married nearly 13 with s 10 and 7. I can appreciate in hindsight we were in a bit of a rut for a month or 2 but never expec
Thank you job and Sotto, I try not to include h in my decisions, what I do, where I go etc. I haven't told him anything about my latest health issues, its none of his business right now. So today's random h act - he sent me a link to a property wit
I am mobile. Will try to summarise the session when at work. Basically yestrrday while watching TV, she asked me not to talk about the affair too much. I said fine as you are cutting contact. She said it wont solve our problem. Yes but a start I said
Worked late last night to avoid W as much as possible. When I got home, she had some supper in the oven for me, boiled the kettle since she thought I would want some tea, asked about my day, talked a little about her day. Just the complete opposite
The last few days I have been juggling a thought back and forth as to how I should continue DBing. I know that I am not detached and I still carry a lot of emotion for W, at the same time I do feel like I am making progress with myself and handling
NYGal we all know it is very hard not to pursue at times, take a breath and step back to look at the great progress you have made! I see DB as a workout sometimes for your mind. It can get tiring and a pain to want to do it all the time, but when
Part of the problem as well in my eyes is that a person claiming emotional abuse and separating to be with OP, and they don't realize it, is it becomes a cycle for them. Now that OP doesn't turn out. They move on and so on without stopping to look a
I know it's difficult. Know that if you reconcile with an addict or compulsive, they are an addict for life. There is no cure They have the right to be an addict if they choose until they choose otherwise. It isn't sensible to demand they change to
I still don't see the purpose of forcing an answer. Stop pushing it in my opinion. He can say whatever he wants. It is up to you to judge the actions. You were not wrong for doing what you had to do. Let him be mad. But until he works through what
Fair enough. I was just reading your thread Thornton and you were saying how maybe your WAW just isn't right for you. And vanilla's messages about the scorpion. I mean, I definitely get the feeling that I'm being stung sometimes, but in my case I'
Painter, my only concern with emotional abuse is that it seems to be a 'catch-all' phrase used by all WAS's for why they are leaving. I am confident that XW thought I was emotionally abusive. Because it's so subjective WAS's everywhere that are fe
JB, nothing odd about my day, I just thought it was odd that I saw so many posters talking about this in one day. Everywhere I checked in it was the same story. Rich, Faith, Tim, Cil, thank you for chiming in. I know it's easy to believe in marria
Originally Posted By: otwi have to admit, i am kind of lost in this. How are you going to give an ultimatum regarding either working on marriage or get a divorce? If the SO has not shown real interest in reconciling then and if you truly don't eat
Thanks for the kind words, Jelly. This stuff really opens our eyes to how disfunctional we all really are. We all carry around hurts and disappointments. Hopefully we can use this painful time to inspire growth in ourselves. Pain is a great motiva
This is my third thread. I'm linking to the next to last page of the 2nd thread because I think that was 'interesting' or perhaps its simply 'depressing'. I don't know. Either way, here's the new thread. ...oonza...oonza...oonza...let's get this
Hi Phoebe, Sorry you had a rough night. DB says to try things and then monitor results, right? So you asked your H to join you on your trip and he didn't respond the way you would have liked. Make note of that. He's not ready to be asked about t
Originally Posted By: NYGalWould he really do that to the children? The old XF would never do that. The worst he would do is say he makes less than he does but offer to give me more money when I needed it. But the new XF? I never thought he would
Also, isn't it lovey that he assumes you telling him to file is because of another man? Does it truly not occur to H that you are simply emotionally and mentally exhausted by now? Again. hugs & strength. Let us know how the talk goes.
Seriously?! Okay first Anna you are one strong woman. And secondly...what the... Your H makes zero sense. Not that any of them do but geez. And I can only imagine what he has planned. Make sure you're sitting down when he tells you. I have a feeling
Painter and Fo You guys are right. We should not try to tackle any type of volatile issues at this point. In the past 2nd job was brought up with marriage counselor as was meeting with a financial advisor. It was settled as an issue we both agree