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Active Topics | Active Posts | Unanswered Posts Past 24 hours | Past 48 hours | Past 7 days
Forum   Subject
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Surfers LL Experiment - Part 2 'Christmas Spew' by roist @ 7 minutes 30 seconds ago

Maybe the LL experiment keeps your focus too much on W. We need to look after ourselves first and foremost. Is this helping you?I love the idea and attitude behind it, but am not sure it should be your focus. We should strive to be the best we can.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: cheesyt 5 - now what? by Vanilla @ 18 minutes 6 seconds ago

Cheesyt This is part of the process, I am sad you have to walk to the pain. Acknowledging ithe and the loss is important. I felt like this, lost and in pain even during in house S when I was sleeping on a cot in my ironing room. Lost sleep, tears
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: it's always darkest just before dawn ... 41 days by bttrfly @ 56 minutes 4 seconds ago

the thing is, my very foundation, at my core, was this wellspring of confidence and joy. The joy was from our love and our family. My strength came from that. Other than BD when he was utterly horrible he has continued to profess his love for me.
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: it's always darkest just before dawn ... 41 days by bttrfly @ 59 minutes 55 seconds ago

thanks KML and Pax Didn't sleep well. Lots of dreams - in the dreams we were getting divorced: by that I mean going through mediation, moving, breaking up everything we'd built over 26 years together. There is no peace. I don't know how to let g
For Newcomers
Steady, your sitch sounds like it has worked out pretty good so far with quick results. My timeline is just like yours. EA or PA in July and sept, and confronted in August. Only difference is my WW was doing active things such as new bank account, ne
Surviving the Big D
Jump to new posts Re: Is there room for a chair more? by Vanilla @ Today at 03:35 AM

Painter You are allowed to change your mind you know. Does it really matter who is at fault, providing it doesn't affect the Fins (of course). The saying a lie issue is a much bigger thing to me. That would be my deal breaker on it. In a sense yo
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: WAS or what 9 by roist @ Today at 03:11 AM

Yesterday I hesitated between using the 100th post of my last thread to journal and then go away to think/reflect. I am glad I choose to start a new thread. The feedback from those who have already walked the mile is invaluable. Thank you all.
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: MLC H acting jeolous when I GAL, what now? by Maybe @ Today at 02:58 AM

Thanks again V. I have ups and downs. Good that I can share my down days here. Yes i complain about my son, but he keeps me busy and happy. So tonight's episode. I asked if H can take care of S for the night so I can have some time to myself. Mind y
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Surfers LL Experiment - Part 1 by Surfer @ Today at 02:37 AM

Jeep. Thanks very much for the post. I think they do enjoy it actually. But I also agree with your point that they don't see it to some degree. But that's because they are allowed to hide from the truth IMHO. I think there is a psychological payof
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Surfers LL Experiment - Part 1 by Surfer @ Today at 02:16 AM

New thread http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2719322&#Post2719322
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Surfers LL Experiment - Part 2 'Christmas Spew' by Surfer @ Today at 02:15 AM

Old thread. http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2719321&#Post2719321 So with Christmas coming so will the spew. It's a seasonal chore frankly. I need to do what I can to protect myself and the kids from t
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Surfers LL Experiment - Part 1 by Surfer @ Today at 02:11 AM

So, NC with W yesterday. After yesterday's outburst. Worked hard all day - lots to do today. W dropped kids this morning without a glance either way. Swimming tonight I have already mentioned to the kids that I might not make swimming today. I usu
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Surfers LL Experiment - Part 1 by Surfer @ Today at 01:49 AM

Thanks V. This is really heavy stuff. It's what I have witnessed. Been through (and am still going through to some degree) but I very much would like to understand the foundation to it. I almost don't want to confront it as it is so true! What was t
Midlife Crisis
Hi fight. I know how hard it is... And the only ingredient to sprinkle on this mess is time... In time you'll start to slowly feel better, but I get how hard it is. Thank goodness for this community. It's the lighthouse for all of us. I can't reca
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Starting life over by Pax_luv @ Today at 12:24 AM

Rouky, congratulations on your singing event! I'm proud of you! I hope you give yourself extra credit for pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone. Fantastic!
Midlife Crisis
Jump to new posts Re: Moving on to the next phase by Pax_luv @ Today at 12:20 AM

Thank you Peace and Sotto! I need to keep reminding myself of this- his anger is his to own, his anger is his to own.... Repeat repeat repeat. You are right peace, I need to do a better job of scheduling myself so I get extra sleep. Did ok toda
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Slowly losing my wife by ForGump @ Today at 12:16 AM

Lex You are Plan B. While she's infatuated with the celebrity she's not going to be really interested in you. When her infatuation with the celebrity ends, she'll likely move on to someone else. But if she can't find someone right away, she may fall
Midlife Crisis
Hi bttrfly, Hope you feel a bit better with the new day tomorrow. I'm sorry you've been feeling down, frustrated, stressed. I do.... But as you know by now, you're on the downswing of that curve.... Soon you'll be on the up and up. Saw a great vide
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Newby here, desperate for some advice (thread 6) by ForGump @ Yesterday at 11:35 PM

Originally Posted By: JRuss"fear". That's what your IC said, but do you believe her? Do you believe that you will not be happy without her? Do you actually feel fear? For me -- it hurts to be heartbroken, it hurts to be left behind, and
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: A WW? (6) by ForGump @ Yesterday at 11:23 PM

LT, sorry if you already wrote about this but ... what do you think you would do if your daughter was not a part of the picture?
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: cheesyt 5 - now what? by cheesyt @ Yesterday at 10:40 PM

Thanks coly and lt I actually didn't reply. She never texted back. I'm exhausted, i feel physically, mentally & emotionally exhausted...I can make it a day and be ok and then night comes and I'm getting ready for bed and I'm reminded how I won't
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Newcomer: How did I get to where I am today? by Chippie @ Yesterday at 10:28 PM

Thanks Zues. Today he's being polite. Saying that we can sleep in separate beds at his moms on xmas. Talking about renovations on our house. Asking me if we should make a stream go under a bridge in the front yard. I said no, we should think about re
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: A Father, that was called a Super Hero-Wolverine by qt4x11 @ Yesterday at 10:26 PM

I'm still following you, friend. I can tell that you are facing challenges every day and choosing to be positive. And I can tell it's not always easy. I think one day you will wake up and it will be easy for you. I appreciate you are very proacti
For Newcomers
Jump to new posts Re: Life is kicking my butt by qt4x11 @ Yesterday at 10:09 PM

I guess was 'reducing my success'. I didn't mean to. I am very grateful to have some terrific opportunities thrown my way. I think a year ago I would have kissed the ground with joy. I think it's just tougher for me to appreciate things right now
For Newcomers
I have debated in my mind all day as to whether I should journal and share today… I have much emotion and feelings flowing, and truth be told, I am not in a place of control where I want to understand it, nor tussle with it further… But as I sit he
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