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Jessie, you cannot allow all this to be swept under the rug. You should not even entertain him returning to the marriage without dealing with everything. This is why it's important to have requirements for reconciliation. Now, most LBSs, and LBWs in particular, bristle at this notion. They see it as a barrier to reconciliation, and so out of fear won't do this.
This.
If someone can get something very easily/cheaply/without any effort, how much are they going to cherish and value it?
YOU ARE THE PRIZE HERE.
As SteveLW says, anything else is just moving the problem down the road a year or two.
