What is the reason she pulled? Is she still using your health insurance? Is she going to lose more in the divorce? Is she riding out child support? There's gotta be some reason.
What is the trigger that gets you to say I'm done, and file yourself?
Me: 40 EX:37 Together 17 years Married 16 years 5 kids, 20,18,15,14,11
There are three primary differences between legal separation and divorce. If you are legally separated, you cannot remarry someone else, you can still be covered by your spouse's company sponsored health, dental, vision, and life insurance and it is easier to undo than a divorce if you reconcile. That last point is why I pushed for a legal separation at the beginning of the process. I wanted to give myself the best chance at reconciling if things went south with OM. Then, I never filed anything else.
As I understand it, my choice was either legal separation setting the agreed financial terms in stone or starting divorce proceedings with the potential to continue fighting over financial terms. Getting the financial aspects squared away once and for all seemed like the better move. The insurance coverages don't cost any more or less if she gets coverage.
As for filing something new to terminate my marital status, I'm not sure what it is worth to me. I never want to get married again and, if I change my mind, I can always file then. Of course, ending the legal process separated was never my goal. I was just trying to bust my divorce and I ended up separated.
Spiral, if you're not in IC, is highly suggest it. I'm thinking you need to work on your self-esteem. Staying married in case things went south with OM? I mean that's the epitome of being plan B.
It's your life, c you can do what your want, but I'm rooting for Spiral to be better tomorrow then he is today. I'm saddened to not see you moving towards that.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
I understand what you're saying. But the legal separation happened three years ago, which was six weeks into my sitch and I have 50/50 custody of my children. If I file for D, the Court has the power to set aside the custody order and reduce the time I have with my children. She has a big financial incentive to reduce the time I have with my children, especially if she is losing her health, dental, vision, and life insurance among other things. And I don't want to risk losing time with my children for whatever benefit being divorced has over being separated.
