I didn’t respond. It’s late. It literally hurts my stomach to think I’m hurting his feelings to not respond to a picture he sends, but I’m too heartbroken tonight. And I think that’s ok
Yes I have plans for IC for sure. He refuses to see a MC or IC, he doesn’t believe in it. I will have to think of my conditions to consider working on the R, Incase we were to ever get there. Doesn’t seem like it anytime soon.
I’m starting to really see where patience comes in. This is so hard, it’s veey hard to not react in certain ways. Especially when it comes to him asking for our daughter. It was a 180 for me to respond the way I did last night. I will stick to this and see how it works, but I do see how hard it is. And how patient I will have to be to even possibly one day see a change. And it may never come but I’ll keep trying
kech you are doing fine. My only criticism is do not keep her up for him. This is the way to handle it:
Him: I want to see D tonight.
You: Okay, her bedtime is xpm, as long as you are here by then you will have time to spend with her tonight.
When you bend to him, ie "I will keep her up until you get here" he knows he still has you on the hook.
Remember, you are living your life. He can choose to be part of that or not, but you are not going to make changes to accommodate him.
I am with you, I think he is at least into (even if it isn't reciprocated) someone at this bar. But yes, I would purposely NOT drive by that bar anymore. You can't stop focusing on him so much until you make changes to stop focusing on him so much.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
You are right, thanks so much. Sometimes I think he purposely makes it hard for me not to focus on him. Him sending me that picture last night of him and our daughter was out of nowhere and it was late, hes usually asleep pretty early. I dont know what kind of response he wanted from me, but I chose to not respond at all.
I wish I knew what he was thinking and feeling right now. If it wasnt for this platform I honestly think I would have already given in, talked to him about things, and possibly asked him to move back in or something because I am struggling. It has been a week since I kicked him out and today feels awful.
Throwing myself into work for now, but I can feel my head going through all our good memories, us laughing, trips weve taken. I dont want to backslide from my hard work but how is this how I feel after only a week?
Nothing worthwhile is easy. The easy path will not get you where you want to be.
Compare to your business. You said you had 3 orders. The easy thing would be to not work on them, take your time. And get to them when you feel like it. Or, get in and work and get them done and shipped. That last one is harder. But the harder path will make your costumers happy, get you more word of mouth, move your business forward, and in general just be better all around.
Same in your sitch. The fact that this is hard is how you know what you are doing will end up being the better outcome.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
I am curious to hear if you, or anyone else that has read my sitch, has any opinion of what is happening. Is it normal how he is acting after being kicked out? One day mad, one day nice, one day crying, etc.
And is it normal for me, the LBS, to feel this low and lost after only a week of him being out? Today feels the worst so far, all of a sudden thinking of all our good times together, etc.
