I am so very sorry that you are going through a rough patch. It is difficult dealing w/your xh and having the additional anxiety of where and what your children are doing. Try to step back a bit and just breathe! You need some time to yourself to recharge your batteries. I hope that you will be feeling better soon.
You know how to contact me if you want to chat.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thank you!! Ex-h always has 2 sides. I do not trust him.
When son lived with his dad, es-h told him thst kim was not there to replace me on many occasion. When son was hospitalized for his heart, they were suppose to call his mom. To son' s surprise, kim showed up. He was angry.. The following week, i get a call from ex-h thanking me for not repla ing him.. ???? And that is what it took to realise the effect of this?? And yes, it was short lived.
D22 and D18 have arrived. D22 said she praticly did not see ex-h. They had a ceremony, had a quick bite to eat, short visit and left. Eventho he was in North Bay, D22 was not included in his outings. The girls were desappointed. D19 (she is a heavy girl) said he fed her vegetables only and would not allow her fruits because of the sugar contents. 3 trays of veggies were her meals. I don' t get it..
Why do they put up with such treatment? It is constant. They subject themselves to his arrogance and self-esteem destruction then complain to me about it.
I was a silent listener while both of them were letting their frustrations out. I then changed the subject by telling them S19 wants to go to Quebec and visit my mother tomorrow. All 5 of us. They agreed. Road trip coming up as a family.
I did have a surprise from D22. She brought her diploma and her grad dress so we can take pictures together!! ♥
Last edited by job; 06/10/1812:26 AM. Reason: edited per the poster
Exquisite Andrew asked me to check in on you as he was concerned about you.
I don't venture often into crazy loco part of the board as largely I don't believe in MLC (aS it's not in the DSM). However I do believe in abuse and jerk wad entitled wassocks.
Like V you appear to operate from fear and created anxiety and you have the added complexity of children.
I want to read your threads and have a few tricks up my sleeve with regards to meeting dingbat so you don't have to miss key events. I will share those with you.
It won't be until Thursday, but I have read that the meet event that was part of the anxiety is over for now? It would be good to build to a point where you don't miss any more if you want to go. If that's what you would like? I can share some things I have learned. Bear with me whilst I complete my exams.
I will not be offended if you say "no V".
Have you read the abuse thread?
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
I hope you are able to get some sunshine therapy today. It's a gorgeous day here in the brown south and I hope up there too. I'm just about to head out for my usual Sunday walk and bowl of soup.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Today was very special. Me, my 4 children, one of my sisters and my mother together. Magical on the soul!
D22 and S19 did not mention anything about their fight. They hugged, they laughed, they enjoyed eachother's companie. Troughout the day, we shared mischievious memories from the past and it was fun.
Andrew and V, thank you for your support. The link you gave me is priorities on my list of homework. I need to knock this out the ball park.i need Strenght and confidence! I was able to set my boundaries one by one with him, this reaction of mine needs to be treated as a boundary. I can do this!
Lovely lady I have read through all your threads. Not too tough as your posts are mainly short and not so sweet.
I think you are suffering from cPTSD. It's common in those who have been seriously abused. I am not a doctor but do have experience in abuse counselling.
My first thought is that the trauma needs treatment as well as the anxiety attacks that go with it. It is your mind protecting you and it serves a purpose. Being NC with your abuser is important and I suspect that the avoidant behaviour is to stop and relieve the Trauma.
The trauma goes deeper than this R with the abuser, it likely has it origins in childhood. Have you had or are you having IC?
Are you in an abused women's program in real life? Have you looked at any online resources to help?
You could try the Freedom program which is available online.
I read a great deal of my sitch in yours. So I walk the talk.
It's going to be ok.
V
Freedom is just another word for nothing left to loose. V 64, WAW
♥