Ugh pax... my heart breaks for you. I wish I could share advice with you but I am glad you are getting advice from people who have gone through something. Hat must help a bit. Both of us are coming up on 2 years... crazy right?!? Anyway, just wanted to say I am thinking of you and hope you have a great weekend!
Just want to reiterate that his anger is all on him. He has free will, as we all do. But there are consequences to every decision we make. Let the legal system run its course. And oi, his poor lawyer.
Try to see the humor in it as it does sound like he's having a temper tantrum over there...
Me 41, H 47, M 15 yrs, S11, S13 BD 1: 11/4/14 we work on it; really I pretzel myself BD 2: 3/31/15 H goes down to "dorm room" 8/15: H back to MBR 10/15: H back in dorm room 1/18: H files, now divorced
Happy Father's Day to the great father figures out there (in whatever capacity)! I hope you have a blessed day.
Thanks Pinn for the drive by. I appreciate you and our virtual friendship so much. This absolutely stinks. I have a new found awareness of bullying and feel so saddened for those young kids who take their own lives because of the constant taunting. It's not something Ive ever experienced personally, but now understand the feeling of "no escape." Seriously..... Whatever move I make, it only makes the situation exponentially worse (for an indeterminate amount of time.). Now, I'm not trying to relate my case to high school or childhood bullying, but I know the feeling. This may be a new cause I could start getting involved in. Side note- I just want to solve all the problems of the world.
The marathon was good. I didn't make my goal time, but I finished. Around mile 18, I got this "zing" in my knee and it derailed me the rest of the race. It was so painful! I Limped through the rest of the run. Knee is fine now. Next up is another sprint triathlon.
Hawho- thank you for the reiteration. He is having a temper tantrum. Ive said it before, it's crazy making. He is the most spiteful person I've ever met. And I knew this before I became his current victim. He will stop at nothing To ensure he doesn't "lose". My fears about this d have come to fruition. At least I was prepared, didn't sign anything when he was trying to manipulate me out of things, and I have my lawyer doing the dirty work. I do have my ego to tend to, and I'm saddened by how he has presented me to my former friends and family. I just keep reminding myself that I have to trust that the truth all comes out in time.
I've worked really hard to ensure that there have been no "digs" at his character in any of my legal docs. I've written a couple statements that have gone there a little bit, but have always ended up deleting them. IT's not who I want to be. So everything has been factual and data driven with no emotion behind it. Wellllll, after his current statement, I'm left questioning if I should fight fire with fire. I know the answer and I don't want to be petty.... But man.... I think my teeth are going to shatter with how hard I'm keeping my mouth shut.
Thank you all. And thank you Job for sharing a bit more about your situation with me. I've long since moved past the search for stories of reconciliation, but now am trying to see what sitchs have simply cooled off and become amicable years down the line. Im grateful for everyone here who continues to pay it forward.
So.... Just got to keep breathing and moving forward. It's tough. Really really tough.
Me- 30's H- 40's T-10 M-5 I moved out b/c he wanted space- June 15 D filed by H: September 16
So I spend 2 hours a day working out at my gym. I am constantly surrounded by super buff men with some amazing bodies. These guys aren't exactly my type (I like somewhat dorky, clean cut guys with long lanky runner bodies), but lets just say I'm surrounded by a bunch of superman/ Hercules types.
I had a dream where my ex was at an event with a bunch of the gym guys and he was trying to fit in so he was wearing a leather vest with nothing underneath and a black choker around his neck. He was trying to compete with them and he looked rediculous! I woke up with a bit of chuckle.
Ok. Now I feel bad for making fun of him in my dream.
Me- 30's H- 40's T-10 M-5 I moved out b/c he wanted space- June 15 D filed by H: September 16
So I spend 2 hours a day working out at my gym. I am constantly surrounded by super buff men with some amazing bodies. These guys aren't exactly my type (I like somewhat dorky, clean cut guys with long lanky runner bodies), but lets just say I'm surrounded by a bunch of superman/ Hercules types.
I had a dream where my ex was at an event with a bunch of the gym guys and he was trying to fit in so he was wearing a leather vest with nothing underneath and a black choker around his neck. He was trying to compete with them and he looked rediculous! I woke up with a bit of chuckle.
Ok. Now I feel bad for making fun of him in my dream.
ahhh hahaha... that's great!! I guess we are going to dream about them, this is the best case scenario!
Today was the court date over the interim sharing of the dog. Long story short, ex has to share and I get my little monkey tomorrow!!!!! I can not wait to snuggle with him. 7 months is far too long and I pray that he remembers me, and is comfortable with me in my place. I can't even express the excitement I'm feeling right now.
It didn't come easy, and while this was a minor puddle to jump, I got a decent flavor for the how the rest of the divorce is going to go and, as I mentioned before, this guy isn't above doing some low down dirty scheming. Got lots of things to work through still. Guard is wayyyy up.
I'm currently at work and I can't concentrate. I just want to run to the store to get him fresh food, treats, and some new toys. I still have his Christmas present wrapped and waiting for him in my living room. (Yes, I'm one of the those dog ladies). I can't wait to see him.
So, today was also the first time I've seen ex in 7 months. I didn't expect him to show at all, but we got to the courthouse right at the same time. No words or eye contact was exchanged. Total strangers.
I looked ok, but not my total best, as I would have if I was still DBing. I'm just living my life regardless of what I look like to him. I made sure not to fidget and look nervous, though I wanted to vomit. My lawyer soon came and we had a few laughs over some of the comments I had to defend that ex has presented in his testimony. Still boggles the mind, but the chuckles helped prevent me from bursting out into tears over the situation.
So... All in all.... I'm so excited to see my pup, but am fearful of what's next. This was not the news ex wanted to hear so I'm weary of the retaliation. Knowing him, he'll fire his lawyer and who knows what else.
With that I wish you all a great day.
Me- 30's H- 40's T-10 M-5 I moved out b/c he wanted space- June 15 D filed by H: September 16
So so so happy for you!! Enjoy the weekend with the pup! So glad that went in your favor. Dogs are so great. WW had a pup before we got together and when things went south, he went with her. I understood though, it was her dog. But I love him a lot. I get real happy when I see him so I know what it's like! There was a time where I hadn't seen him in 7-8 months. Have a great weekend pax!'
I am so glad that you are finally getting to have time with your puppy. The two of you will enjoy your time together. I do hope things go more smoothly in the future for you w/trying to negotiate things w/your h.
Enjoy!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thank you both Pinn and Job! The weekend with the pup has been awesome so far!
I think the greatest blessing is, we haven't missed a beat. Even though it's been over 7 months, the bond is still there. Dogs are amazing creatures. I was nervous that he might be hesitant around me, but nope, not at all. When I picked him up, we had a great embrace, he eagerly hopped in my car, we drove home, and he walked in as if he never left. He was home. So freaking great.
We've just been snuggling and playing and going for walks. It's the life!
I can't say the same for ex. Boo. What a curmudgeon. I won't get into it now, but our exchange (or lack thereof) was completely immature.
Anyway, just wanted to pop in with that news! I must say, there's no such thing as "just a dog."
Hope everyone enjoys the rest of their weekend.
Me- 30's H- 40's T-10 M-5 I moved out b/c he wanted space- June 15 D filed by H: September 16
