- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
Goals - Enforce boundaries with both WW and S4!!!! Lots of other ones too...
Sara - thanks for stopping by. I actually went out tonight with a friend and it was nice. I don't do it much and will be more.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
Well, lying is a big one. Another is if we share finances, you gotta be on the same page. ww's spending has been more and more out of hand, looking like she's stocking up and doing shady money stuff.
I decided that her breaking these and not actually working to make them better, on top of the limbo, gives me no other option than to file to protect my son and me.
I did so and she was served today. She pushed to talk last night and shared that she was gonna file tomorrow.
I honestly hoped that filing might shake her up but that's not gonna happen and this wasn't a bluff. Reality might but I'm not holding out for that. I look forward to really separating and moving forward with my life. This has been abusive and I'm sick of looking over my shoulder. Some weight had been lifted but not all.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
I've been reading some of Lim's and txhubby's posts over and over for inspiration.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
The holidays have been way rough and exercise along with mediation and breathing exercises have helped me deal. Also no drinking when I'm super depressed.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
Sorry that you had to file. That must have been difficult for you. I am praying for you and S4.
H-46 XW-38 T-7 M-6 S-9,8,8,6,4 S 11/30/15, I filed 12/8/15 EA 2/1/16 D dismissed 3/24/16 PA 3/18/16 confirmed 4/22/16 XW files for D 4/1/16 - D final 11/17/16 Finally moving forward...
I greatly appreciate it jk. It was difficult and I actually cancelled an appointment to do so in September. I didn't have a choice this time as I happened to do it just before ww planned to. I have been an advocate of doing so to break limbo and the associated abuse.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
Well, lying is a big one. Another is if we share finances, you gotta be on the same page. ww's spending has been more and more out of hand, looking like she's stocking up and doing shady money stuff.
I decided that her breaking these and not actually working to make them better, on top of the limbo, gives me no other option than to file to protect my son and me.
I did so and she was served today. She pushed to talk last night and shared that she was gonna file tomorrow.
I honestly hoped that filing might shake her up but that's not gonna happen and this wasn't a bluff. Reality might but I'm not holding out for that. I look forward to really separating and moving forward with my life. This has been abusive and I'm sick of looking over my shoulder. Some weight had been lifted but not all.
What boundaries do you have for your separation? Boundaries should be specific and tangible, less feelings based. For example, "out of hand" and "on the same page" are somewhat subjective, while "discussing all income and expenditures that impact our joint account" is less subjective.
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
The above boundary around money was for marriage and the budget that I made defines that clearly. Filing is how it's enforced. Once separated, the only real boundary is abuse/neglect of our son and I'd enforce that one legally.
- m and ww in 30s - s4 - m 11 yrs, t12 -ilybinilwy ~5/16 + request for OM - bd 7/16, confirm ea and strongly suspected pa - 9/16 ww claimed to have broken contact with om
