I'm really worried that I'm not doing things as well as I could, it is such a struggle isn't it?
This could be the hardest thing you will ever have to do, but you can do it! Have you read, re-read, and than read again Cadets links?
Originally Posted By: Esame
I felt like things were getting on a little better, he hugs me more and he is more affectionate, but we had a chat that almost got tense. It was a "safe" topic, maybe I'm reading too much into it. Maybe I'm reading too much into everything, I just worry though.
Really focus on learning validation techniques. Two ears and one mouth, let your H do as much talking as you can and just absorb things. Validate his feelings, even if he is unhappy with the way his tooth paste taste. You both are fighting your own demons right now.
Last edited by Cadet; 04/16/1606:30 AM. Reason: fix quote
This could be the hardest thing you will ever have to do, but you can do it! Have you read, re-read, and than read again Cadets links?
Thank you for your reply. I am reading the articles whenever possible, but I am really keen to get started on the book as soon it gets delivered.
The weekend has been even harder, he is home and even though he is helpful and funny and affectionate, he couldn't be any more distant if he was in a different continent.
Originally Posted By: cubebot
Really focus on learning validation techniques. Two ears and one mouth, let your H do as much talking as you can and just absorb things. Validate his feelings, even if he is unhappy with the way his tooth paste taste. You both are fighting your own demons right now.
This is still hard for me. Not the fighting demons part, I'm getting to grips with that. Validating his feelings without coming across as patronising or as not having an opinion of my own. I simply need to shut up more often, and give him a chance to speak.
"There's nothing sadder than a conman conning himself"
“There is freedom waiting for you, On the breezes of the sky, And you ask "What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, What if you fly?”
You say that your husband was helpful, funny and affectionate while being very distant. He could be temperature checking you to see if your changes are genuine and long lasting.
You are at a very fragile point in this relationship and it would be extremely helpful to know what your next move should be. Feel free to give me a call at 303-444-7004 to discuss how we can best help you determine what to do next.
Cristy Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004
A Divorce Busting Coach can help you save your marriage, even when your spouse wants out.
Email virginia@divorcebusting.com or 303-444-7004 for more information or to get started right away.
Things are very difficult for us at the moment, my mother in law got diagnosed with ovarian cancer two days ago and we are both socked and worried.
When the time is right I might email you for information about councelling, but I am not in the USA so maybe the telephone option is not suitable for me.
"There's nothing sadder than a conman conning himself"
“There is freedom waiting for you, On the breezes of the sky, And you ask "What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, What if you fly?”
Oh no! That is terrible news about your mother in law. I'm hopeful that the recommended treatment goes well.
Even though you are not in the USA, the DB telephone coaching program is still a great resource. We work with many, many people from all over the world.
Please feel free to call or email me and we can figure out the logistics.
I'm wishing you the very best.
Cristy Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004
A Divorce Busting Coach can help you save your marriage, even when your spouse wants out.
Email virginia@divorcebusting.com or 303-444-7004 for more information or to get started right away.
. To say I am excited is an understatement. I'm really looking forward to reading it, and implementing the advice.