Going straight forward...antlers 6th thread.

[cat03]

about txting dds, once-twice per week should be fine, I bet a thousand bucks they wondered why you havn't text them...

When depression hits you go out there, run, do something physical, even if you want to curl up and mope, that's when you want to be on the move... use this horrible experience to make you stronger, you will, doesn't seem like, but you can grow stronger.

I think all the love songs and sappy movies teach us that the loved one should be our all, our everything, that nothing matters if they are gone... as with everything in this earth, we should hang to things/people loosely...nothing is ever for certain, nothing should define us in such a way that pulverizes us when they/it is gone... alas, we can only learn through experience.

[antlers]

Thanks.

My son and I are leaving for a road trip on July 31st. 'That' I am looking forward to. I'll be alright after all this is said and done, I believe that...I just hate like hell having to go through it. And I hate it that things are the way they are.
"Us men have this nasty habit of putting all our emotional and physical energy into our spouses and families. When they're gone we're usually left with no one. That deep emotional connection is left severed." - 'That' I can relate to also!

[antlers]

On Wednesday, I texted my youngest daughter with...
"Hi daughter. I hope you're having fun during the summer. Sure do miss you! And I love ya'.

She texted back...
"Thanks".


Then I later texted my oldest daughter with...
"Honey, I want you to know my criticism and wrong behavior in the past reflected how I felt about myself instead of how I felt about your mother, you, and the little kids. Some people learn from the mistakes they make, they change, and become better people. I wish I was 'then' what I am now. I love you, always did, always will."

She texted back...
"I understand your 'self-hate' in the past, but it takes time to heal, too. And if you're not wearing a helmet when you ride that motorcycle I'm gonna be pissed."


I've been doing a lot of physical activity over the past few days. Riding my bicycle a lot. Endorphins are a good anti-depressant.


"Ne te quaesiveris extra." - Emerson

[ImprovedRomeo]

Antlers, those are positive hopeful interactions with your kids. Just don't over do it...give them space and time and just casually check in once every other week or so or and let them know you're there for them. Let them come to you...slowly.

You're doing great...what kinda m/c do you ride?

[antlers]

I was kinda surprised...hadn't heard from them in a long, long time. I hear ya'.

Thanks. I ride a Honda VTX1800F.

[ImprovedRomeo]

VTX1800F - that's a big bike. I have a little NightHawk that I don't ride much at all...I'll be selling it after D. I used to spend a lot of time reading advrider.com - even wanted to buy a Suzuki VStrom or a BMW F1200GS and do a coast to coast trip and then up to Alaska! but it may have to wait until DD's grown up.

Ride ATGATT!

[antlers]

Yep, the VTX1800 is a torque monster! I enjoy that bike so much! I bought it so right that I get giddy every time I ride it. My friend bought a new Harley Fat Bob and, although it's a wonderful bike, he paid a ton for it...and it made him kinda sick when he found out how much more he paid for his bike than I did for mine! He really liked that VTX when it was sittin' next to his bike too!

Rode a charity bicycle ride this morning...we did 65 miles in awful heat and humidity, and over hills that were so tall they blotted out the sun! It was one of the hardest rides I've done. I rode it with some friends who also ride...good fellowship and comaraderie with good people.

My son is still with me.

[Bridgestone]

My son is still with me.

wonderful news about your son and congrats on the bike ride!

Bridge

[antlers]

My son has been staying with me for quite a while now (his choice)...not as long though as my daughter has been staying with her mother. I haven't seen my daughter since the middle of March. I have pleaded with STBXW over these many months that she shouldn't be influencing and/or keeping my daughter from me. I have told her many times that I miss my daughter and that I want to see her. STBXW never responds to me regarding this.

Haven't heard from the kids mom since since July 3rd. Today I get this from her...

"You have and continue to destroy the bond son and I had with your lies, manipulation, and controlling behavior. You continue to hurt me and these kids because you are a selfish individual. The only thing you're sorry for is that we even got married and are financially bound. I want to see and talk to my son. This is one of the worst things you've done, however it doesn't surprise me that you'd do something so sick even to your own child".


How do I respond to that?


By making me responsible for everything, she makes herself responsible for nothing! She is doing, and has been doing, the very thing with our daughter that she accuses me of with our son! And she sees no problem with that!

Isn't there some hypocrisy there on her part?

How do I respond?

[ImprovedRomeo]

Antlers, that's a loaded email- don't take the bait. Remember cool, calm and collected.

"STBXW I'm sorry you feel that way. I will never want any of our kids to not speak to us nor will I ever tell them anything bad about you. I'll suggest to S to contact you."