I will take all the advice I can get. I want this all too end. I have accepted ex's choices, now I just wish he would let me live my life with my kids. The more I ignore him, the madder he gets.......
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
i have talked to mine about this day-- the one we all think about. When/if our children say they want to leave and live with them. My c said that if that happens i am to call him - and set up an appointment with him and d13. he is level and not emotionally involved... do you have that option??
your x is an A@@ and I am so sorry he is such a dirtbag slime ball poop!!!
ur x must have forgotten about hormones, and education, and tears, and boys, and everything that goes with raising the kids... RAISING them. its easy to be disney dad.. not easy to be a parent.
oh and the car thing.. here is a thought. DONT stop him from getting her one- think about it. PLAY it back on him. IF he would buy her one if he is livin with him. WE KNOW it is a manipulation ploy.... BUT you could ALWAYS turn it and say.. wow.. that would make it EASIER for you to go to dads and come home....... TURN IT trusting...
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
T my heart breaks for you. If I remember rightly your son lived with H too. Now that he is away at college your H needs to replace the money I assume he was getting for your son living there (I certainly have to pay my STBXH maintenance for my S17 - while he currently pays nothing for D14). My advice is that your D is old enough to understand this and if necessary old enough to hear the truth if she has to. My STBXH promised my S17 a car as well. Now that he is taking lessons STBHX has backed down saying that he only promised it if they moved too far away from his college, which they haven't. S17 isn't stupid and he knows deep down that a car was never likely especially now he has a baby sister due on Christmas Day.
So far none of this is bringing my S17 home b/c he is behaving in a manner that all teenagers go through. That coupled with a dad in MLC will eventually be a recipe for disaster. He knows I am here waiting for that day and he knows my arms will be open wide when they need to be.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
So far daughter is still with me. I talked to her about how all of that makes me feel. I told her it is not an option for her to live with ex, just visit. I told her I would call the police if ex kept her past her visitation schedule and then he would have to take me to court to get the divorce decree changed. I will not sacrifice my daughter for my ex's deep seeded needs. Daughter listened and did not rebel. I hope it sunk in.
Another note, ex texted me 6 times today. Telling me all about his work and the usual stresses. It was odd and really quite inappropriate. I did not respond. He is just looking for a narcissistic feed to suck dry.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
T I think there comes a time to let go --anything I see my xh do at this point would make me feel that same way he is just too into himself he was all along, only I supported him in the past during the crises as a way to connect and show him I still cared No longer a reason for any of that If spouse needs support they should seek C or can talk to OW we need to conserve our energy for our new life peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
I don't want to expel any energy anymore with him. It is not worth it. I am going to concentrate on my goals and nurture the children.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Not much to report, ex has been quiet for the last couple of days. I just found out I have hypothyroidism. My doctor blames it on all the stress I have had in the last 3-4 years. At least there is a little pill I can take and feel o.k.
Kids are doing well. My son in college is thriving and getting good grades. There is a lot to be thankful for.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
