i was in the midwest at my sisters wedding. she just remarried for the 2nd time... been single for 20 years!!! it was good... it was good to see what God can do. (she was a WAS.... she has many many regrets and her life has NOT been easy....not at all.)
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
Kids asked him why he is spending money when he says he has none.
He told the kids he got a great deal on a cruise.
3 credit cards are maxed out.
So not in reality.....
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Trusting, Still fighting over at tye pigsty? The cruise should be a very interesting one....I cannot see either one of them enjoying a cruise if they are constantly fighting...but then again, maybe this is how they communicate.
As for the credit cards, he's got a lot of bills coming due soon. It shall be interesting to see just how he plans to pay them off. He's still off in la-la-land.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
"Kids asked him why he is spending money when he says he has none."
Wow and they are 4, 14 and 17? Thats quite a question at that age. There is no way I would have said that, or challenged my parents, or even been aware of their financial sitch, or of finances in general at 4 or 14 and at 17, I couldnt care a less what they were up to, I was too busy being a teenager. How come they aks these things of their father?
I still thikn you should stop looking at him as SO deluded/ill/mental/whatever. My ex has behaved badly and had bonafide depression for 2 years, but as my C said, even depressed people, like my ex are capable of making choices for themselves and of functioning and actually living a life.
I wonder if he doesnt pick up on your disapproval, or pity.. can you have a bit more of a positive attitude toward him? Yes he's acting out, but he is also getting on with his life and doing what HE wants to do for now. His life hasnt totally gone down the tubes.. he does still see his kids at least and holds down a job. Can you try and view him as a friend, in that, would you heap such disbelief, dissaproval and "tut tut" on a friend? I'm not saying you convey that to him, but he may detect it in you.
If my ex lost his job THEN I would have been worried, that was the barometer for me.
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
When the kids need money for school, movies, books, etc.. ex always tells them to ask me for the money because he is broke.
They were very confused when he told them he was traveling again. We have always traveled in the past and the kids know how expensive this is.
Ali, you are right. I do need to be more positive toward my ex.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Positive - kind - those are all things that Jesus would tell us to do. I think it does more for us internally then for them. Which is really what this is about...healing US.
M-20 years/BOMB 12/24/06 Moved out 3/12/07 D final 7/30/2008 finding myself again
I enjoy most of it, but throw that in with working a job, cleaning the house and taking care of 3 kids.
Ex just got back from his cruise.
He had the kids over for Memorial Day dinner with OW.
He had to tell the kids all about his trip.
What is wrong with this picture?
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
