Hmmmm, so with my H being a Cancer...what is the way to his heart?
GL on the banners! That sounds so fantastic!!!
Hmmm, perhaps let things sit at friendship for a little while longer. Then maybe turn down the occasional invitation from him. Let him wonder what you're up to by yourself.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
Sounds like you had a really good evening playing with your tools and eating delicious dinner!
Isn't it so funny about these WAs and wanting help with their Cvs? It's so great that BF came to you with that though- it shows that he really trusts you. And I think it's so positive that he wants to apply for a job close to home. How convenient will that be when he moves back in?
I have to say that I think those moments of connection are really important. My H used to do that, and they grew, so they were a real baby step for him. Hopefully they are for BF too (?).
I'm crossing my fingers hoping to read about bottom grabbing on your thread soon. Can't wait!
Yes, why cant they write their own flippin CVs, what are we, like their school mistress or something !!?? Made me laugh thinking about the bottom thing.. my BF always said what an incredible bottom I have (and so did his mates!!) and I must confess that cooking for him does involve lots of bending over to get things out of cupboards/the oven/the dishwasher and I took every opportunity to sort of wave my bottom in his face tonight...
But, nothing.
I may have to declare him clinically dead if this carries on (or change the name of my thread)!
Oh and yes, I think I can safely say that he completely trusts me, way more than anyone else in his life, even his own mother. I'm at a loss to work out why we're still apart. We've never had a cross word, we're the best of friends, we laugh, we chat, we share the same values, ideals, politics, opinions, we like the same food, music, films, humour and people. I assume he still fancies me. Maybe we are TOO harmonious? Maybe theres no GGRrrr, no ooomph. Maybe he got bored? I dont know. I dont think he is bored of me. He once said I was the least boring person he knew. But then.. he's depressed. His love died.
Ok, banner number 2....
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
I may have to declare him clinically dead if this carries on (or change the name of my thread)!
Partner left after 9 years- clinically dead?! I know it's a bit morbid and is sort of black humour, but that's making me smile, Ali!
I love the idea of you innocently waggling your bottom at him tonight- very subtly flirtatious. You might not have seen signs, but I bet he did notice!
You are so delightful!!!! I am very excited to hear about the bottom-wagging. Do you think that is why he always is "hungry"?? Um, can you teach me how to speedcook in 15 minutes???? that skill could dramatically change my life!!!!
I am really excited about your banners. Can you post some pictures of them in the chapel after you do the photographs? that is so great that BF is so supportive of your artwork. that is really important!!!!
I would say, just pay attention to all the little flickers, the sweetness, the eye contact, etc. I mean, I would probably cream my panties if I got an arm squeeze. PERSONALLY!!
that is so great that he wants your help with a CV! I dunno, to me a man asking for career help is really intimate. and sets you up for more contact. I hope he gets the new job near you too! But, even if he moves away, that doesn't mean he won't come back to you. It could be that he moves farther away phsyically/emotionally before he moves closer. Like for a long time I was terrified of what would happen if my B moved out of NYC to some godforsaken middle-of-nowhere place. And then I realized that if he was in the middle-of-nowhere, his quality of life would probably improve, his stress levels would go down, and he would be able to figure out his crap a lot faster. So if your BF was back with all his friends, in familiar territory, etc, who knows, if it was a big quality of life improvement, it could accelerate your BG getting out of his depression and he could think: Wow, now I finally have everything I thought I wanted, but look, I am missing something very important, and that is the love of my life, Ali! That's just my 2 cents.
What are you thinking about that new bed?
Thanks for explaining about the new moon! I *love* second chances!
-arm rubbing / close face to face contact: a big deal IMHO. Arm rubbing is actually a very intimate gesture...(not to be confused with rubbing other limbs)
-the "cooking display"...yeah, he notices. You don't need to worry about that. Keeping it subtle as you have is the way to really work it.
Ali, this is really sounding good--I like that it is happening slowly...it carries more weight than some kind of sudden turn around on his part.
Thankyou guys! Taking a break from sewing. My cat was "helping" by turning into Cliche Cat and playing with a cotton reel. I think she may go pick a fight with Jerry in a minute. Hi Purr, RTL, Michelle and T! This is great this staying up lark, cos you are all up too ! So, generally, everyone views this as positive? I swear he didnt notice my rear, but I'll believe you guys if you say he does! Depression does kill the sex drive I hear, so maybe thats why (it is 6 months with no nooky for him too, and theres no OW definetly, so thats kind of wierd, to voluntarily go through such a drought!) But thanks RTL, Michelle, Purr and T for pointing out to me that that these little touches are significant and I guess you are right.. we are building something here, or all this is building toward something maybe?
He IS very supportive T, and so kind. OH! He blurted out earlier "I must get that new sprocket for your bike because that will improve the gear changing" (I dont even NEED one and I didnt ask for it. I dont even know what a sprocket is!), so more Acts of Service!. I was thinking earlier that I have been ridiculously spoilt on and off over the past few months. Apart from the odd quiet lull, hes been very much in my life. But theres something DEAD about it. Over. Moved on. Its like that comfortable wonderfulness you feel around your best mate, you chat, you laugh, its great to see them, you tell them all your news, you whinge about your family, you divulge some strange skin coplaint (he always seems to have a new one!), but... you dont want to get them naked and go at it hammer and tongs do you. No. Theres a difference.
I cant put it plainer than that.
As usual, see what tommorow brings. May as well get that tatooed on my forehead. And see, I didnt kiss him! I do listen to you guys you know, you are like the voice of my concscience speaking to me in a wierd cacophony of accents.
Ali x ps.. Thanks T, I totally forgot about the bed !! I'm not sure, it is going against his wishes, he hated it.. dont know...I'm such a sieve head though!
Me:40! H:37 Together: 12yrs IDLY & left 11/07 ADs 03/08 OW 8/08 Reconciled 05/09 now married! my thread
