It's been a while again..............I'm still active on other boards, it's just hard to be on too many boards and keep up with everyone...............
What is life like post MLC?
The vacation went well: Yellowstone, Salt Lake City (friends, family – visit to homes and schools from W’s childhood), Grand Canyon.............................then we finished our foster care class - a couple more documents needed, some on -line stuff they just started, finish up the back ground checks (yes I was cleared to work the B-2, but it wasn't the state of AZ who did that check...............they have to do their own back ground check...............what a waste of time and money). Working this week on rearranging the furniture and setting up the spare bedrooms.
D13 is back in school doing well and back in soccer, 1-0-0 so far.
W has registered for collage - CLEP'ed a couple of classes and sent off for her old transcripts............should have her AS b/4 she retires from the USAF in Oct ’08.
I'm keeping busy with the other boards I'm on, playing older computer games from years gone by................set up one of my old PC's with Win98, no internet (also for Foster children), and loaded some of my old software...............
But we passed the one-year post MLC mark early this week (W said that was in May - not by my postings at 4060)............and things have never turned back…………………..in part because we both grew through her crisis.
If you can hang in there and the path of destruction is not too much to handle - hang in there................it’s not easy and I don’t think I could do it again (ok – I wouldn’t)……………but we are both better today for what happened…………….
This has been a turning point to a better M. In 25 years will either of us will remember much about this time? Because in 50 years neither of us will remember much of anything.
Thanks for sharing your story; I'm truly happy for you and your wife. I'm still waiting on mine, but it's nice to see some people come out with a stronger marriage and healthier sense of self. I'm working on the latter in my own case; waiting, but not helplessly so, for the former. I'll still wait for now.
I want to join the line of folks thanking you...I always love these posts of reconciliation, and especially those like yours that don't minimize the difficulties involved in coming back together.
18 months post crisis - still married :-) Dealing with ups and downs of a 14 year-old D and exW whose still in lala land.............she's been pushing D14 to move up with her - and D14 like a typical teenager under pressure, takes it out on me and my W...................we are going to let D14 go live with her Mother, not that at 14 it would do us any good to fight it - I just hope the lessons learned are not too harsh and that she will wake up and smell the coffee before she gets into too much trouble....................but such is life.
W and I have drug our feet on Foster/Adopt - since W IS retiring from the military this year and will then have the time needed to devote to more children in the house. W has finished her A/S and is working towards her B/S - setting up to go 100% on-line courses once she retires (something to keep her busy while the foster/adopt kids are at school).
We have been house hunting here since D22, D20 and GS1 are here plus once you get into the fos/adopt system - you are kind of locked down for a while. Found a nice 2.5 acre Horse Property with a 4 bedroom..................good possibility, my bid on it as early as this weekend.............
For me - been waiting for 20+ years, family, job etc.......: took the Motorcycle Safety Foundation 2 day course, got my license and found a 2006 Kawasaki 900 Vulcan - with only 1789 miles (over 2400 now :-) 3 weeks ago for a great price...............and 45 - 50 MPG (gas going to $4 a gal? maybe - good excuse to get the bike :-).
Life is never all peaches and cream - but I wouldn't trade it....................
This has been a turning point to a better M. In 25 years will either of us will remember much about this time? Because in 50 years neither of us will remember much of anything.
18 months post crisis - still married :-) Dealing with ups and downs of a 14 year-old D and exW whose still in lala land.............she's been pushing D14 to move up with her - and D14 like a typical teenager under pressure, takes it out on me and my W...................we are going to let D14 go live with her Mother, not that at 14 it would do us any good to fight it - I just hope the lessons learned are not too harsh and that she will wake up and smell the coffee before she gets into too much trouble....................but such is life.
W and I have drug our feet on Foster/Adopt - since W IS retiring from the military this year and will then have the time needed to devote to more children in the house. W has finished her A/S and is working towards her B/S - setting up to go 100% on-line courses once she retires (something to keep her busy while the foster/adopt kids are at school).
We have been house hunting here since D22, D20 and GS1 are here plus once you get into the fos/adopt system - you are kind of locked down for a while. Found a nice 2.5 acre Horse Property with a 4 bedroom..................good possibility, my bid on it as early as this weekend.............
For me - been waiting for 20+ years, family, job etc.......: took the Motorcycle Safety Foundation 2 day course, got my license and found a 2006 Kawasaki 900 Vulcan - with only 1789 miles (over 2400 now :-) 3 weeks ago for a great price...............and 45 - 50 MPG (gas going to $4 a gal? maybe - good excuse to get the bike :-).
Life is never all peaches and cream - but I wouldn't trade it....................
I'll agree with that since it agrees with you
Like you my XW was kicked to the curb upon the discovery of infidelity. Life wasn't easy with her before the discovery and hard as hell for a few months after but the sun shines brighter every day now.
I have sole custody, my house and cars.
Men this is a wake up for you..........
The laws have changed, you have an even chance now.
If you are new to DB and a man please realize the cards are no longer stacked against you.
AZ, Never easy, but worth every bloody foot print, huh?
Yes.
I don't consider this as piecing any more - but Life, Post MLC. We did all of the piecing we could.
On Path Partners (your Male friends might want to swing by there for a read) Christine's thought is that crisis is a phase of Mid-life Transition.....................and seeing my W from wake up to today, I have to agree. My W did wake up - but still needed time to DO what she wanted to..............and that has been going on for over a year.
This has been a turning point to a better M. In 25 years will either of us will remember much about this time? Because in 50 years neither of us will remember much of anything.
