Nancy's story ************ Yep you heard me right....Last night he told me that he is coming back and would be moving back before Thanksgiving. Said he needed to straighten things out with his landlord. (He is breaking the lease). H said that he would be telling his lawyer today to stop everything and that were getting back together. I couldnt believe my ears..at first i thought he was joking, I made him repeat it He also told me that he is not coming back just for our S but for me...and that he is in love with me and wants to make it work.. H spent the whole evening here yesterday before he told me, Said it right before he left...SO i have had hardly any sleep i was so excited. He said he sees so many positive changes in me and hopes they wont change and could tell how much i have been trying and is glad i never gave up. But over the months we have talked everything out (his needs and mine). And know it will take work on both our parts not to get back to where we were again. But i feel really positive about this and i cant wait till he is completly moved back in. I was were alot of you are right now...and i didnt think i had a prayer in getting him back. But i put everything i had into this DBing and read and posted alot.. I didnt believe it could work on us but it did!! So please, read read and read...It may not show at first but H will notice the difference in you (all postive) and it will give him something to think about. I am not saying i know everything...i am far from that....but i just wanted to let you guys know that i was very skeptical on all this ,,,,,until i noticed changes in my H attuide and i also felt better about myself This was probably the most exhasuting 10 months of my life but it was all worth it.. And i know i still have work to do because i do not want to ever be in this positon again...So i am going to keep DBing even when he is back ..I am going to try to make it secound nature. Thank you so much everyone out there who has helped me along the way.....could of never of done it without you!! I will continue to keep you all posted on the outcomes.. and my prayers are still all with you. Nancy
[This message has been edited by Michele (edited 12-17-2000).]
An update from Nancy **************************** Hi everyone, Just wanted to say that and tell you everything here is really good.....and you wont believe it but i think DBing has become a perment part of me now...It helps me so much on how to approach my H. and how to avoid conflicts. Its a whole different relationship than we ever had and its working....Better than before. SO you guys out there remember your going to build awhole new relationship with your spouse....From the ground up...thats where the becoming friends comes in...Its not easy but if it works....it sure is worth it just to hear your spouse say he is happy to be coming home at night. I try and help as much as i can.....I made a promise to someone out there that if mine worked out ,(with there help).. I would be happy to help others. I am no way a pro at this....But i have learned alot and believe it or not..still reading at relationships...I hope i can help from my own experiences and being able to get both sides of a situation now that H is back and being able to ask him ....what were you thinking Hoildays can be rough when you are in these situations...There hard enough when the holidays are not here.....But so many people out there have such strenght that they dont even know about yet.... Hope all of you have a great holiday...and i wish you all only the best. nancy
