I sensed a lot of negativity in it. As I've seen here so many times before, when in doubt, do nothing. I know you are upset. I know how very hard this is. Maybe it would be best not to reply at all, at least not until you are more centered and less upset.
Thanks for the email, I appreciate your sharing with me more than I can tell you, and I know it's hard. I do want you to know that Aaron didn't say a word to me about the phone call, nor did I ask him.
You said in your email "perhaps none of this matters to you". It matters a great deal to me, it's huge in my life. I do love you as I have never loved anyone else. I truely believe we could build a great relationship. I made a choice to commit to working on that with all I have to give.
I think, H, that I need some time to figure out what it is that I want.
As for last night, I do apologize for my harsh words. It seems the easiest path is always to slip back into old habits. You, I know, undestand this more than most. It is something that I work on constantly and will continue to work on no matter what happens between the two of us because I am happier this way.
He already knows that he has to make a choice. He is just too, excuse me, up his own ass to do it. You telling him is not going to make it happen. It just sounded like warning #2001, if you know what I mean.
There's some good stuff, but leave out the middle part. Especially about how your changes are permanent and for you. He's going to hear "blah blah blah blah."
(I would want to choke him, too!!!!)
I can't say I never blew up at my H...because believe me, I did....
Maybe sit on it for awhile. See how you feel in a little bit.
Thanks Dawn, I think this feels like a good fit....I'll send it in a minute and see what happens. I'm still tempted to cancel a meeting and go home sick.
thanks gals, you're sure right about the warning 2001 and the blah blah blah as far as permanent changes. Thank God there are people on this bb whose brains are functioning today.
I have to say, he seemed a little shook and taken aback when I told him I'd talked to an attorney months ago. I'm thinking I want some one with more of a "scorched earth" approach if it comes to that, however.
Maybe Dawn is right...he does seem to really snap around when he thinks he's losing you.
If being nice doesn't work...well...maybe time to go a little dark. If nothing else, for your own sanity! He moves back and forth so fast, it's a wonder you don't get whiplash. LOL
My $.02? Maybe, for later on this weekend, make your own plans for you out of the house and doing something fun/pampering. You deserve it.
I think you deserve it. Go on and go shopping! Wouldn't hurt if you got home after H either. Try to remember tonight to strive for inner peace and even keel. If H attempts to bring up the R, politely refuse to talk about it. If you ask for space then you need to act like you want it.
I will be thinking of you this evening. Take care.
Thanks gals....I will take that all to heart. I just sent the email, according to the computer he hasnt read it yet....I am a snoop, huh?
Frankly Nevanna, I think I have a chronic case of whiplash. I swear I do nothing differently that precedes his changing directions like he does. I even said that this morning and he agreed (again)... Lordy, if I don't focus on myself for awhile again, he's going to drive me nuts!
That SOB....I got a reply from him from the email....very short, said "what then may I ask brought all this to your attention?"....meaning if S didn't tell me and I didn't ask him....how'd I know????I shouldnt have, but I answered him. Told him as I'd mentioned before, I sensed him pulling back and noticed his gasoline being 2x what it was and then saw the cards in plain sight. Geez, what a toad!
I should have just ignored that email. I wonder if I can recall it.
He moves back and forth so fast, it's a wonder you don't get whiplash. LOL