BL, I promise you, they don’t remember how big and extravagant Christmas and birthdays are. They remember show showed up and how they felt. I understand the feeling of needing to be “perfect” for our kids, but kids don’t want perfect parents. They want real parents. Present parents. Reliable parents. And you are all of that.
Honestly BL, your kids are not a dealbreaker! For me, personally, I love kids and kids love me. I’m like the pied piper of children. The reason why I am so hesitant was because of how much it hurt when me and M broke up and I just lost his son. We were super close, I loved him , and I never got to say goodbye and to this day, I can’t not shed a tear talking about it. So it’s not because my kid is older and I’m about to be “free” in 2 years ( BTW, it’s not as exciting as I thought it would be, a pice of my heart won’t be living with me anymore and it makes me so so sad) .
I say this not to sway you into falling in love with me 😂but the kids thing will be a deal breaker to a few, sure, but like B said when someone falls for you, the kids will not be a deal breaker.
Again, not to sway you into falling in love with me, but I did have long distance R once ( 2.5 hours away, more than you probably are from me) and it didn’t work back then for multiple reasons, but because my daughter was young and there was no situation changing in sight . Now, I will have freedom in 2 years . So it’s actually a different perspective.
I don’t say this because I know we totally would hit it off, but just general. While dating for you might have additional challenges given the kids and their ages , really, they are challenges, not deal breakers
I'd swipe right on you Ginger - could see us hitting it off in real life - but the anonymous message board makes that challenging. Plus if we're being honest my young kids and the distance is probably a deal breaker.
So BL I totally get you rejecting G based on the posts of her love life on here. Believe me I do lol. But she is flirting with you. Just go with it. Practice makes perfect. I bet this is your problem on OLD unless you are lying to us. If you have the 6s it shouldn't be that difficult to get some dates. Be fun! Be playful!
I'd swipe right on you Ginger - could see us hitting it off in real life - but the anonymous message board makes that challenging. Plus if we're being honest my young kids and the distance is probably a deal breaker.
So BL I totally get you rejecting G based on the posts of her love life on here. Believe me I do lol. But she is flirting with you. Just go with it. Practice makes perfect. I bet this is your problem on OLD unless you are lying to us. If you have the 6s it shouldn't be that difficult to get some dates. Be fun! Be playful!
What does that even mean, LH? Why would someone reject me due to the posts regarding my love life? My love life is not so tragic. I date amongst many challenges. They don’t work out sometimes. You act like I’m a train wreck and awful at dating, but I’m really not. Just haven’t found my person yet. That’s a pretty rude thing to say. Like your love life has been so incredibly successful ?
BL, he is right about one thing. You can absolutely practice your flirting on me. You are good it as it is, but I’m here to help.
You don’t have to “make-up” for anything, especially for your ex wanting a divorce.
Even though I know that, and even though this life for my kids wasn't my decision, I do still feel a deep sense of guilt and need to be perfect for them at times. It pops especially at certain occasions like birthdays or Christmas. I know I need to let it go and give myself grace, but that sense of guilt and need to "make-up" is there at times.
One thing to think of here B....
You can have them in your life for a minute...
Or you can have them in your life for a lifetime....
It isn't about you making up for anything....
It's about you giving them a full enriched life, showing them character and molding them into well balanced adults....
Why the F would you feel guilty for doing that ??? : )
Perfection is un-obtainable...
It's showing them that when life kicks you in the huevos, you respond with dignity, honor, grace, and courage...
Pretty sure you are trying to do that.....
Originally Posted by BL42
Originally Posted by Ginger1
OK, back to our regularly schedules program. You better get a move on, BL, my coworker gave my number to her boyfriends friend.
I'd swipe right on you Ginger - could see us hitting it off in real life - but the anonymous message board makes that challenging. Plus if we're being honest my young kids and the distance is probably a deal breaker.
Originally Posted by Ginger1
I was hoping it might be you, but the picture isn’t how I imagine you to look.
So you're saying this guy isn't really, really, really, ridiculously good looking? ;-)
I am guessing we measure success very differently. I consider mine very successful and my guess is Don H and Andy would not.
Huh? Because Andrew and I think alike about so many things… said no one. I guess it comes down down to how you measure success. If landing a super hot, partially broken chick for a few months or bagging the younger office slut is the benchmark…. I’d maybe agree in my 20s and probably 30s just not in my 50s. But other than that you and I have many of the same dating rules. I’m just picky with a high bar and not trying to shove anything in my exs face.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
