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Originally Posted by bttrfly
ice rink always hit or miss depending on weather.

Oh I hear you. November to March is pretty much guaranteed. But May is a bit iffy. Lol


Feelings are fleeting.
Be better, not bitter.
Love the person, forgive the sin.
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only in your benighted part of the world D...


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D Final 12/23/16

"You know who you were before & during your marriage. Find out who you are now. What are your core values? What do you really want? Then, live it!"
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BL42 Offline OP
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Originally Posted by bttrfly
BL, why don't you put a rink in your yard?
Geez bttrfly! I'm sitting here thinking I'm crushing it as a single dad and you have to go and make me feel inadequate! lol

S7 actually did ask me this year if Santa could get him an indoor soccer dome in the back yard: "Eh...not sure Santa does that buddy...don't think it would fit in his sled?" lol

Originally Posted by Ginger1
Skiing, my ex traumatized me when I was 20.
Sounds like you just need the right teacher ;-)

Originally Posted by Ginger1
I’m happy to be in the lodge in front of the fire with a hot toddie.
Nothing wrong with that! ...perhaps a hot chocolate and Baileys as well?

Originally Posted by Ginger1
She wants to try skiing this year, but wants me to teach her.
Just tell her to pizza and french fry and she'll be fine.


Me:39 Ex-W:37
M:7 T: 9
S:6 D:3
BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20
OM1 affair ends: May '20
W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20
W files for D: Jul20
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I’ll try skiing again, but only with you.

Especially if there is pizza, French fries, and hot chocolate with baileys ( that sounds delicious) involved .

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Originally Posted by BL42
Originally Posted by bttrfly
BL, why don't you put a rink in your yard?
Geez bttrfly! I'm sitting here thinking I'm crushing it as a single dad and you have to go and make me feel inadequate! lol

It's a gift.
G can boost your ego, lol


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D Final 12/23/16

"You know who you were before & during your marriage. Find out who you are now. What are your core values? What do you really want? Then, live it!"
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I enjoy boosting your ego, BL. I’m happy to do it!

I am going to ask you a tough question though. I know you are PARTIALLY joking when you say you are inadequate as a single dad for not making a hockey rink.

But there was truth to it. You are indeed killing it as a single dad. Even take the single part out . You are killing it as a dad. I imagine if you were married, you would never think you were inadequate at all for not doing the huge gestures.

You don’t have to “make-up” for anything, especially for your ex wanting a divorce. Your ex doesn’t even have to make up for that in big gestures.

Killing it as a parent looks the same either way. Being emotionally present, keeping them safe, helping them grow and learn and teaching them healthy boundaries. You do that, and you are killing it as a parent? Single or not !!!

OK, back to our regularly schedules program. You better get a move on, BL, my coworker gave my number to her boyfriends friend . He lives in PA and is a flyers fan. I was hoping it might be you, but the picture isn’t how I imagine you to look.

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if skating is something you really love, and you'd like to share that with your kids, then build a rink.

it's a ton of fun and their friends LOVE to come skate.

if skating isn't for you, then do something else.


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D Final 12/23/16

"You know who you were before & during your marriage. Find out who you are now. What are your core values? What do you really want? Then, live it!"
Joined: Jun 2015
Posts: 5,903
Likes: 326
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Remember I was married to the guy who built a rink every year, yet brought his AP to Hawaii on our 21st wedding anniversary and tried to stiff me with half the bill.

I was married to the guy who moved thousands of miles away and became someone else's everyday dad, not his son's.


So. Building a rink isn't a measure of quality of character.


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D Final 12/23/16

"You know who you were before & during your marriage. Find out who you are now. What are your core values? What do you really want? Then, live it!"
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BL42 Offline OP
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Originally Posted by Ginger1
I am going to ask you a tough question though. I know you are PARTIALLY joking when you say you are inadequate as a single dad for not making a hockey rink.
Originally Posted by bttrfly
So. Building a rink isn't a measure of quality of character.
I really was just kidding about hockey rink inadequacy. Though it was an especially interesting suggestion considering S7 actually did ask for a soccer dome in our backyard!

Originally Posted by Ginger1
But there was truth to it. You are indeed killing it as a single dad. Even take the single part out . You are killing it as a dad. I imagine if you were married, you would never think you were inadequate at all for not doing the huge gestures.
Thanks for the kind words. I do know I'm crushing it as a dad, and I'm proud of that. However...

Originally Posted by Ginger1
You don’t have to “make-up” for anything, especially for your ex wanting a divorce.
Even though I know that, and even though this life for my kids wasn't my decision, I do still feel a deep sense of guilt and need to be perfect for them at times. It pops especially at certain occasions like birthdays or Christmas. I know I need to let it go and give myself grace, but that sense of guilt and need to "make-up" is there at times.

Originally Posted by Ginger1
Killing it as a parent looks the same either way. Being emotionally present, keeping them safe, helping them grow and learn and teaching them healthy boundaries. You do that, and you are killing it as a parent? Single or not !!!
Will do, and would've regardless - it's not even a question. Always wanted to be a dad; love those kiddos more than anything.

Originally Posted by Ginger1
OK, back to our regularly schedules program. You better get a move on, BL, my coworker gave my number to her boyfriends friend.
I'd swipe right on you Ginger - could see us hitting it off in real life - but the anonymous message board makes that challenging. Plus if we're being honest my young kids and the distance is probably a deal breaker.

Originally Posted by Ginger1
I was hoping it might be you, but the picture isn’t how I imagine you to look.
So you're saying this guy isn't really, really, really, ridiculously good looking? ;-)


Me:39 Ex-W:37
M:7 T: 9
S:6 D:3
BD/IHS/Confirm EA/PA: Feb '20
OM1 affair ends: May '20
W/OM2 & moves out: June-July '20
W files for D: Jul20
OM2 confirmed: 9/2020
Divorced: May '21
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When the heart wants what the heart small children, distance, and anonymous message boards are no obstacle


M 20+ T25+
S ~15.5 (BD)
BD 4/6/15
D Final 12/23/16

"You know who you were before & during your marriage. Find out who you are now. What are your core values? What do you really want? Then, live it!"
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