Been doing very well today and this evening. Made a great dinner for kids and S’s friend. Got stuff done today. Exercised.
Yesterday morning W informed me she’s heading out of the country. No response from me. But I was thrown into some ptsd symptoms storm. Reached out for help and followed steps that I know work and got on track.
Focusing on me and kids. Planning to have a blast! And take good care of myself.
you've taken another step in the direction of peace.
you can't stop her from whatever it is she's going to do.
you can focus on yourself, your kids, and live your best life. She may or may not notice and do something about it. Regardless, you'll be ok. I promise.
Congratulations on that step. I know it's not easy. Keep going. You're doing better than you think.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
Yesterday morning W informed me she’s heading out of the country.
I am worried about your mental health Rock this must be very difficult for you. There was a poster years back TXhubby who watched his w run around him for years and it almost killed him. Until he finally had enough. He did end up reconciling at some point because he was done with his W.
DB-ing is very hard. And men and women are different. Even MWD will tell you that it's harder to turn around a WAW and WW than a man. Also, there is a tendency on these forums to get stuck in waiting mode. MWD talks about the last resort technique, after the last resort techniques, ultimatums and going dark. These are proactive, powerful things that show you are serious. They almost never get mentioned or implemented on the forums. The nature of a forum leads to lots of analysis about every conversation, text and facial expression in the relationship.
Yesterday morning W informed me she’s heading out of the country.
I am worried about your mental health Rock this must be very difficult for you. There was a poster years back TXhubby who watched his w run around him for years and it almost killed him. Until he finally had enough. He did end up reconciling at some point because he was done with his W.
DB-ing is very hard. And men and women are different. Even MWD will tell you that it's harder to turn around a WAW and WW than a man. Also, there is a tendency on these forums to get stuck in waiting mode. MWD talks about the last resort technique, after the last resort techniques, ultimatums and going dark. These are proactive, powerful things that show you are serious. They almost never get mentioned or implemented on the forums. The nature of a forum leads to lots of analysis about every conversation, text and facial expression in the relationship.
LH is right, but you have to be absolutely ready to do the LRT before you do it or it will amount to absolutely nothing.
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
LH, I am also concerned about my MH and I’m taking action. Going to talk to my therapist today about my lows and my plan to get through W’s absence.
“ MWD talks about the last resort technique, after the last resort techniques, ultimatums and going dark. These are proactive, powerful things that show you are serious. They almost never get mentioned or implemented on the forums”
I am reading DR again. Can you tell me more about this?
It’s really not easy. Thank you for your support. It even took me awhile to type it out here on the boards that she’s going again. My first worry was actually about youngest D - how would I be able to pull it together to be there for her? I did - I am doing it, and I will be here for her.
I’ve realized that what’s going to happen is going to happen, no matter what I do to try and control it. All it does is cause me anxiety and stress when I try to control. I am not perfect but working toward dropping the rope and acceptance of whatever the situation is. It’s upto me on how I handle my part. A lot easier said than done. On that note, I appreciate your posts, they help me a lot. I think you are doing the best you can, and love seeing the growth in you as you lost. Stay strong my friend.
LH, I am also concerned about my MH and I’m taking action. Going to talk to my therapist today about my lows and my plan to get through W’s absence.
“ MWD talks about the last resort technique, after the last resort techniques, ultimatums and going dark. These are proactive, powerful things that show you are serious. They almost never get mentioned or implemented on the forums”
I am reading DR again. Can you tell me more about this?
Real quick cause I'm busier than a one armed wallpaper hanger this morning.....
This is the best description that I have read about the LRT.....
It's from an old moderator here named JamesJohn......
