I think it is great that you can express your concerns. At the same time, when you do so on an open forum like this, sometimes not everyone is going to read and relate to them exactly as you may have intended. I stand by everything I said but it wasn’t said in a mean-spirited way. I was just trying to give you a different perspective. Sadly, you seem to have such a negative outlook and it is likely a product of depression and not feeling like you’re enough.
My thoughts get really dark when I exceed the limit of my meds. Controlling my brain is challenging on a good day much less one where life is coming at me from a dozen different directions. D14 called me at 5:30 this morning upset and needing advice. She sent this boy a mirror shot of herself wearing a sports bra and shorts. She told me it wasn't bad and offered to send it to me so I could see for myself. I trusted her and said it was fine. Anyway this boy was blackmailing her to send him nudes and harassing her because she kept saying no. He's threatening to post the picture she sent him on social media for all to see. She will learn more from this than I could ever teach her so I spared her the lecture. Reassured her that I wasn't mad, to turn off her phone and to acknowledge that she had no control over what he did with that picture.
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Even in your response you said it was only a short time until you’re alone. KAS, you are not going to be alone when your kids leave the nest. They love you! You may LIVE alone but you won’t BE alone because you’ll always have them. I doubt if anyone posts anything to you in an effort to make you feel awful. On the contrary, I think people respond to you to offer you help, light at the end of the tunnel, support, advice.
I'm being ridiculous I know. Everyone here has been super supportive and I'm not trying to be difficult. Cheated on, left, divorce after 30 years, pandemic, firing my attorney, single parent, it's a wonder I'm not insane. I think I give new meaning to what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Wow. If I survive this I'm going to be unstoppable. lol
Do you know the parents of this kid? If so I would call them and threaten to report their son for soliciting child porn. They have actually pursued police action against these kid even if they are underage too. Don't let this creep go on to do this to other, more vulnerable girls.
Well that was fun. I hadn't officially fired my attorney yet but she just fired me first. I haven't answered any of her emails because she can't be bothered to answer mine. She then called me. Ignored that too. Anything she needs to say can be said in an email.
Do you know the parents of this kid? If so I would call them and threaten to report their son for soliciting child porn. They have actually pursued police action against these kid even if they are underage too. Don't let this creep go on to do this to other, more vulnerable girls.
As much as I'd love to go after this kid there are um problems. First H is a cop. Second my relationship with D14 is not yet on stable ground. Reporting this would absolutely blow up her world and she doesn't need that right now.
Does H have to get involved if you just speak to the boy's mother? You could approach it from the standpoint of her son may get in trouble in the future because of child porn laws and although your daughter didn't fall for it, others might and her son could go to jail. Not in an angry way but a mom-to-mom "you need to know what your son is doing so he doesn't end up in jail" sort of way.
I don’t know this kid and she’s not going to give him up. We haven’t been close for a long time. She’s here now and showed me the picture. Omg it’s nothing. I expected at least a bunch of cleavage but nope she did a side shot and hid them and her face.
Well maybe just have a serious conversation with her about how his behavior could ruin some other girl’s life - and his, if convicted on child porn charges. There are news stories out there about these charges being brought in situations with teens. Give her the bigger picture. Then let her decide what to do - or decide what to do together. Don’t sell her short. Whatever you do, the message shouldn’t be to stay quiet about sexual harrassment.
