D17 asked if I preferred working in the morning or the afternoon. I dodged the question but afternoons are better. I cope better with this house at night. I stayed up way past midnight and slept in. The past 2 days I have to come home to.....this sad house. I'm 99% sure the last guy that lived here before was recently divorced. He had a tv, bedroom furniture and a recliner. Neighbors said they had to call code enforcement because he wouldn't mow the lawn. This place reeked of depression so I get it.
Today is the first time in months that I've fought back tears.
I’m sorry you are having a tough time today. Don’t fight back those tears it better to have a good cry. You are doing really well and moving forward. In the grand scheme of things you are early in the process.
Ended up having to take my sliver of a pill and then I felt better. Managing my anxiety is hard enough without adding a pandemic to it.
Continuing to do our 80s movie marathon and started watching Crocodile Dundee. I remembered how he left his wife of forever to marry his co-star who was 19 years younger than him. I googled them hoping their R imploded quickly but nope married for 20 years before divorcing. Well so much for my karma story....but wait what is that I see? She remarried a man closer to her own age and some quick math says she was dating him while still married to Paul Hogan. Yep there it is. Karma and he's devastated. Poor baby.
I keep an eye out for rental houses to give me something to look forward to. I figure I'll have to move 2 more times so I shop for both. We're getting a new building that will be near this cute town square. A rental house just popped up that is within walking distance. Its a super tiny 2 bedroom house but it's all I need. Despite us being in a pandemic 20 people have already applied. Same thing happened with the house I have now. Yeah it's a sad house but it's cheap and in a nice (old) neighborhood. I won because I have an 820 credit score.
Trying not to fret over the next house. That one hinges on the amount of alimony I get and that is in the hands of a judge.
I am sorry to read that you were having some down times. If you feel the need to cry...then do so. Crying helps us cope because we can let all of those hurt and pent up feelings out.
As for homes, both rental and sale, it seems like people are checking them out everywhere. I guess they are a lot of free time right now, so they are visiting the sites and determining what looks good for them. I hope that you can get the place that you want. It would be a fresh and new place to start moving forward.
Please take care of yourself. BTW, it's time to start a new thread and link this one to it.
Last edited by job; 04/15/2005:45 PM. Reason: added link to new thread
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
