Wow - if :35 days is the record that might be my friend! It was way longer than 14 days.
After I looked at the date, and I know better and should have looked right away, but still, that study/report is now 5 years old already so undoubtedly things have progressed. I just mostly wanted to clarify that this didn’t sound like an LVAD as Ginger commented. Honestly I wish it was an LVAD as he’d have more time that way. What we don’t know is does he have permanent heart damage or something going on that he just needs to buy some time until his organs start functioning again and take the load off the heart. For the non medical folks among us the Impella is a short term full pump device that pretty much takes over the hearts job of circulating blood while the Left Ventricular Assist Device (LVAD) assists the main chamber of the heart in circulating blood - one takes over for days to weeks, the other assists for months to years.
He could still have a good outcome here. He’s just very sick and in need of a new heart (based on what you’ve told us) this clearly ups things for you J but these are the real life things that help to define if this R will survive and should move to M. Dates and fun are part of it but real life happens and it’s that stress that can really refine an R.
DonH Midwest Me 56 WAW-EXW 55 Met 11/95 / Married 5/00 Bomb 6/20/05 / She Filed on 6/2/06 / Divorced on 10/9/06 4 who'd qualify as GF since D & dated about 25 women since D
He is currently being evaluated for a heart transplant. From I understand he met with the transplant team on Friday and will find out by the end of this week.
The Doc and I had a good weekend with Valentines Day on Friday and then out to her ranch yesterday. Tomorrow there is no school so I will have my girls and her son.
Interesting developments with the XW today. We were talking at my youngest daughters soccer practice and it looks like I am going to get to meet her BF on Sunday. We have a mutual family friend that is having a birthday party next week and she really wants us both to go. Usually whoever has the girls is the one that gets the invite but she would really like us to both be able to attend when something like this happens in the future. So today at practice my X and I got on the topic, brought up by her, and it appears that it was my XW that has been nervous about me meeting her BF.
As we were talking she was doing a lot of justification and talking about him ways where it felt like she was wanting my approval. She was really concerned about how I felt about him and I have no idea why as I have never met him or had any conversations with her about him. As long as he is good to my girls I really could care less. Not sure why she felt the need to justify him to me, what his job was, the cars he drives, etc. It just felt kind of odd. Additionally, as we were talking to one of the other soccer parents, she made a comment to the lady about how I am her XH. Then after the lady walked off she apologized for it to me. It was just wierd.
Anyway, I have no problem meeting him, feel as though I am in a really good place (at least I hope I am), and truthfully could really care less. Maybe it would be good for my girls to see me interact with him as well I have no problems being civil, cordial, polite and respectful for the sake of my girls. I am smart enough to put my kids first and would never do or say anything to make them feel awkward.
I told the Doc all this and we thought maybe she could meet my X at one of my daughters soccer games. The X was asking a lot of questions about her today as well.
Not much to report this week. Docs xh got transferred to a different hospital as his liver wasnt recovering so he still has a long road to cover. I had her son on Monday as their was no school and we have now got to the point to where I have him and my girls if we are off. It saves her over 100 bucks in babysitting money which means a ton to her as she is extremely frugal.
XW still acting wierd, not returning text messages, not responding to my emails, forgetting when I gave her cs money, losing my daughters soccer gear, etc. She seems to have got much worse with keeping things straight. It really feels that I am the glue holding all of this together with money, kids, etc.
It really feels that I am the glue holding all of this together with money, kids, etc.
You probably always were but because nothing fell apart you never noticed.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Totally agree with Andrew. You were always the glue and now that she decided to be "unstuck" from you (so to speak), you are seeing the results of what happens when she is left unsupervised. One would think surely an adult could get it together, particularly where her kids are concerned, but sadly, that just doesn't seem to be the way for some women. There are women who always rely on having a man to be their safety net and it sounds like your XW was one of those. I think someone else pointed out awhile back that she likely feels threatened that you seem to have traded up from her to the doc, but that is her problem to deal with, not yours. You clearly have done the work to be a better partner and you are continuing to do the work to show that to the doc. Just my personal opinion as a totally outside observer who only hears one side of the story, but it sounds to me like XW is spiraling a bit because she is realizing what she gave up and what the doc gained.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
Makes since D-money, looking back I did a ton. She really had it on easy street.
The Doc made a statement to me about how my XW's loss is her gain.
I am sure she is struggling but all my interactions are about my girls. This is not tough stuff we are talking about. For example, I sent her a text yesterday that was exactly this
"GM......can you check to see if you have our daughters soccer cleats and chin guards? I can't find them..thanks!"
No response, I had to email her 2 more times and then she responded. I needed to know because she had practice last night and if she couldn't find them I needed to go get her a new pair of shoes and replace her chin guards. Which I ended up doing.
Anyways, I am beyond frustrated. You would think she would not want the Doc to see her behavior.
I know she has been looking the doc up as she made a comment about knowing where her office is. There is only one way you know that information.
She turned me loose what did she think was going to happen. Regardless, this is about our girls, and operating in their best interests.
The Doc made a statement to me about how my XW's loss is her gain.
When S asks me "where have you been all my life" I answer "in training"
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
So I need some advice. I was not able to meet my xws BF today. We have a mutual friend that is having a borthday party on Thursday. I was invited even though i dont have my girls. Usually whoever has the girls gets the invite. The Doc knows about the party and when I was talking to my XW today she didnt voice any concerns about me attending and I was going to bring the Doc so they could meet. My XWs BF is working and can't go. I dont want it to be awkward but at the same time if I go and don't bring the Doc I know she will be mad. Does anyone see any reason why I shouldn't go and bring the doc? The xw has been dating her bf for more than 2 years so I can't imagine she really caring.I guess its something I shouldn't worry about. Thoughts?
