WAH didn't hear S19 come in so he doesn't know we know. The OW was over there again today. WAH must have taken a couple of days off. WAH sent over the firewood.
I figure he's being nice because he's about to file or its just guilt.
My main concern is money. Do you think WAH is clever based on everything I’ve told you? Does he know this is coming? Has he prepared? He made some big mistakes early on? Is that a good thing? Why hasn’t he filed? I know there is no rush unless he wants to marry.
My state doesn't have a no fault based divorce unless we both agree to it so she's going with adultery. I could easily prove it now with a PI but once he gets served he will go underground. I signed the complaint this morning and she said I didn't have to do anything now. The thing that gives me the most comfort is she's asking for temporary support while the D is in process. This means we go before the judge. I think I should at least be able to get a few hundred more than what I'm getting now which is HUGE in my world. I think he's still at the 2nd job just not as many hours as he said. He's just lying to D14 so he can go out on dates.
He's never home and we all assumed he was working to pay all the moving expenses which were the equivalent of one months pay. Just the moving expenses. This doesn't include a hospital bill. Oh and he's a big spender too as he tries to buy his kids love. Expensive birthday party, gifts, upgrades to S19's car, etc.
My main concern is money. Do you think WAH is clever based on everything I’ve told you?
No not really, he sounds to me like he THINKS he's clever which is typical of WAH's. He thinks he's fooling everyone while fooling no one. Serving him papers will be a cold slap of reality that his little secret ain't so secret after all.
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Does he know this is coming? Has he prepared?
No and no.
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Why hasn’t he filed?
I can only guess, but my guess would be that he knows it's going to be expensive for him so he's avoided it.
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I feel sick and I’m falling apart
Very sorry, I know it must be miserable! Hang in there!
No not really, he sounds to me like he THINKS he's clever which is typical of WAH's. He thinks he's fooling everyone while fooling no one. Serving him papers will be a cold slap of reality that his little secret ain't so secret after all.
Thank you. I needed to hear this. I need to hear anything other than he's having a grand old time laughing at how stupid I am. He's going to come unglued when he sees the word "adultery".
He probably thinks I'm sitting at home waiting for him which I was until yesterday. I want to believe he underestimates me.
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I can only guess, but my guess would be that he knows it's going to be expensive for him so he's avoided it.
We kind of agreed on a settlement, he looked at the budget then didn't file. He's since offered me less and is now paying me less. The dividends are still up in the air. I'm thinking it's only a few hundred dollars a month so why not get rid of me?? He is a kick the can down the road kind of guy.
Its sickening to think that WAH gets his happily ever after while I'm a single parent. He can lie about where he is to do whatever whereas I've got kids who need me. I don't want to date it's just the thought of he gets to come home to someone, gets to double his income again while I'm stuck. He spent the last 2 days off tucked nicely in bed with her. We had a romantic weekend before the BD and now he's gone. I'm stuck in this negative loop. Knowing I might get more support helps but I can't get that thought to stick.
Maybe so, doesn't really matter though. You're doing this to protect yourself and not as a form of revenge, right?
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We kind of agreed on a settlement, he looked at the budget then didn't file. He's since offered me less and is now paying me less. The dividends are still up in the air. I'm thinking it's only a few hundred dollars a month so why not get rid of me??
He offered less and is paying less, so that tells you he's trying to cheap his way out of this. He more than likely realizes that if he files it's going to cost him in L fees, extra spousal/ child support and who knows what else. He sounds like he's avoidant in general so there you go.
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Its sickening to think that WAH gets his happily ever after while I'm a single parent.
I would GLADLY have chosen to have my kids 100% of the time rather than 50 and let my XW sow her wild oats as much as she wanted. You are very lucky in that regard. And who says he's happy? He doesn't sound happy.
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I don't want to date it's just the thought of he gets to come home to someone, gets to double his income again while I'm stuck
You're jumping to some big conclusions there. You just found out he was dating, and now you've already got them shacked up and sharing incomes! Quit spinning, all it's doing is messing with your PMA!
I wandered into a MLC thread. He didn't appear to want the D but went through with it anyway. He stalled for years. I don't know if he had someone or not. He didn't at the time but maybe earlier he did I don't know. Having someone changes things doesn't it? I don't know because I haven't read those stories yet. Just wondering. Anyone know?
