Yeah I agree with Bttrfly. It sounded like she jumped the gun on leaving her son's sitch and this is what is needed to keep the judge happy. It might not have anything to do with you -did she say it does? If it's not about you then this might be a very good thing for your relationship to get back to just dating, with less friction.
I can understand how low you must be feeling right now, Andrew.
But, I also think this is the best thing all around. If it’s over, then you can move on and learned a lot about what you want in a relationship.
If it’s just her moving out, you get your space with the cats back, with no stress about getting another place to live and you can both date properly.
Andrew, even though I’m so sorry (I hate to think of you being so down) but I felt a loneliness in your recent posts and I honestly think this is the best thing for you.
Thanks all. Her stated reasons are issues with S38 and the GK along with not being able to see herself living in this house for the next 10 years. I presume the latter because it's too big and too urban.
I don't know if there are other reasons but did ask if she had found someone else which got an emphatic no.
I'm very sad, more than a bit upset but given that she's only unpacked clothes leaving the rest in boxes in the laundry room for months she certainly wasn't at least subconsciously invested in staying.
I am uncertain what this means for "us". I don't want to be left on the shelf. She said we'll talk and I don't think she knows either. My approach has been to back right off with no more PDA.
I saw her off to work with just a hug and kiss on the top of her head. I think that she's almost as confused as I am but my history of mind reading isn't to be trusted.
Time for my shower and off to work. She doesn't know if she will be here when I get home or not and we got stuck in a "what do you want " loop.
I'll survive. I've gone through far worse.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
I’m very sorry Andrew. I know it hurts. But sometimes being lonely when someone is actually around is worse.
You say you got stuck in the “ what do you want loop” I think you really need to think about what YOU want and be honest and true about it, and not so much what does she want. You have been given the opportunity to be open and honest to you and yourself about what you desire. Take advantage.
And remember. She can only put you on a shelf if you let her.
the worst loneliness, in my personal experience, is the loneliness one feels when in a relationship ... I'm very sorry my friend. take it a day at a time xoxoxoxo
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
I am sorry to read that B is moving out...however, she jumped the gun w/moving in when things weren't settled between the court and her grown son over the care of the two grandkids. B had a lot of baggage that really needed to be sorted out before moving in w/you. She needs to be on her own and get her life together before entering into a serious relationship, i.e., getting a divorce finalized.
Andrew, please do not allow this to get you down. You've got so many wonderful qualities that a woman would want in a man. Take some time to lick your wounds and then get back out there! You just might be surprised who crosses your path when you aren't looking.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I am sorry to hear A....I have been reading along with not much to contribute but I know it hurts. Like you said you have been through far worse! Treat yourself to something you enjoy.
Good to see you old friend. I hope you, the boys and the forests of northern Florida are all doing well.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
Excitement? Please don't tell me you got drunk and knocked-up your neighbor's wife.
We're doing well. School starts on Monday. My youngest son will be a freshman in high school this year. Both of my sons will be in high school. It's hard to believe. The years have flown by.
And, I've had several positive interactions with my XW via Our Family Wizard. Wonders never cease.
