It does feel like it's restarting. I am also not 100% comfortable yet with my daughters seeing me interact with the Dr. it's just different than what it was with their mom.
It's still all a learning process for me, I feel very comfortable around her however my biggest issue is just letting go. Feeling, embracing, allowing myself to really feel her.
LOL Nef…..I have learned that the older I get. I am trying to listen this time, I didn't necessarily listen when I was young. She had some concerns with my XW...………..
I really don't have much to report. Summer is moving right along, I have my girls in camps 4 weeks since I have to work. Took some vacation to supplement the rest. Today the went to see Toy Story 4 so they were very excited!
The Dr and I are still just humming right along. No more kid meetings since a couple of weeks ago although my youngest saw her yesterday as I had to go to her office and pick up a laptop from her that she asked me to look at. I took it back over to her at 8 last night, told my daughters where I was going so they were cool with it. Even got in a quick session!
We see each other pretty frequently which is cool. Everything is very smooth and easy, sometimes it feels like we are a married couple. No drama, no fights or arguments and I don't feel like I am suppressing myself either. It just kind of clicks with how I am and who she is. I no longer feel myself stressing out either which is cool.
So we just continue to do our thing. The girls don't seem to be bothered by it and everything is going really well.
That sounds awesome J. Looks like things are settling in nicely. Super happy to hear how your D's have reacted to the Dr. and now that they've met, you can be more open about it.
Curious to know how things are with exW. Are things fairly predictable and settled with her now?
Yo M....thanks, I feel very settled at the moment. It just re-affirms that everything is only temporary, the good and the bad. You can't get too high and you can't get too low. I try to stay neutral the best I can.
Things are settled with the XW. I only see her at kid events. We do sit next each other usually with one or both of the girls sitting between us. Kid exchange is still usually only 5 minutes max. I do not hang around and engage in idle chit chat. I do get the impression that she would like to though. I still just keep it quick and to the point. I have still not met her BF I kind of thought that once she found out about the Dr. that it might open her up to make that happen but not yet. The only time I reach out to her is for kid stuff. If it's not kid related we don't talk unless she talks to me about her life which she does do from time to time. If she initiates then I will be polite and listen, make comments, etc. but I am still not the one to initiate. So still very much following my DBing principals just because I don't have any desire for anything else with her. I am not rude, angry, mean or anything like that there I just don't have a desire for anything more. We do joint birthday parties with the kids. We also have some mutual family friends that have had parties were we both attended as well.
I still think back to all the crap she pulled when she moved out and initiated the D combined with some of the things she and told me. When I think about all that it re-affirms the position I have taken which is less is more and why would I want to be friends with someone who treated me the way she did. It's not out of anger it's out of self-respect. I learned a lot.
why would I want to be friends with someone who treated me the way she did
At this distance, I could even be friends with my ex - if the way he treated ME was the only issue, because I'm WAAAYYYY over it. But the way he's treated our kids since the divorce - THAT I can't forgive.
