I don't really know what it's about. There is nothing on my profile suggests I am into younger men or into random hook ups. There are a couple of face shots, a pic from skiing and a pic out to dinner with friends. It shows my age and that I have children. All pics are fully clothed with no cleavage in site. My answers are light hearted, for example "the key to my heart is: making me laugh".
I decided not to approach anyone - just wait for what comes through. However as I only seem to get men in their 20's, a few in their 30's and then men in their 60's It seems that men in my age range are not interested in women in their age range. I have started chatting with a guy in his late 30's who seems normal - the one with a son. We are meeting for drinks on Tuesday but will both be heading our separate ways after as we both have the children that night.
I did agree to meet the one who wants to give me a bum massage (before he mentioned the bum massage). He initially seemed normal and suggested we meet on Friday for meal and I said I already had plans. He then text me pretty much all night asking if I was done yet, that he was only 10 mins away in an uber, that he could come get me if I that was easier and finally, the offer of the naked massage. I said tempting, but unlikely as I was out with girlfriends and it was going to be a long night. He then asked if he could call me when I got in to chat. Pity because he is really nice looking and has a job that sounds like he might have some brains.
On the H front I saw him briefly saturday as he asked if he could come have lunch with the girls and I. I haven't seen him since and probably won't now until he gets back from his boys holiday in vegas next week. He does have the girls tomorrow and tuesday night and is then dropping them at school before he heads off for his holiday. His mum didn't even know he was going away. That is how secretive he is.
After lunch the girls and I headed into London to watch a show. We took the train in with a girlfriend and her daughter (who were going to the musuem) and spent a pleasant train ride with them and then stopped at a cafe for a bit. It was nice. It was a long day (we watched the evening showing) and it was after midnight before we got home. D12 was most amused at the people on the train coming home. All slightly (but pleasantly) tipsy from watching the football finals. She giggled a lot to herself on the train listening to their conversations.
Today we went to MIL's house. D12 wanted to see her so I rang this morning. H wasn't there as he is 'away' (i.e. working or out). It was pleasant enough. We chatted about holidays etc and I have set up a whatsapp group for his mum, H and I so that we can co-ordinate days out for his mum and the girls - she said she didn't know who to call when she wanted to see the girls.
I love how you are working it out with your MIL. That is precious and something your children are blessed to have.
My MIL called me last week and told me that she saw this coming (she always says stuff like that) and that I don't deserve any of this and she couldn't get involved (oh that she wouldn't) H was so secretive she just now knows that we are having any issues (after 2 years lol). I never really warmed up to her so I consider that a 'win' on the column if this D goes through! Not bitter, just looking at the bright side! She has always wanted me to confide in her, but I've never felt close to her. (she was horrible to my H growing up and as an adult, she trashes him quite frequently.) Not a healthy relationship for me at any rate. I'll be fine with her being grandmother, but not friend. Make sense?
I'm a little jealous of your night out. We moved into a very small town 3-4 years ago and it was perfect for us then, but me out here by myself is probably not the best for me. It's hard to not worry over the future while at the same time not knowing where I want to live. I have no idea!
ME47 XH44, S28 S24 S19
8/17-BD IHS: 1/17-2/19 D FILED (ME): 7/19 D FINAL: 10/20 M23 T25 OW CONFIRMED: 01/21
Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
Bum massage man, ewwwwww! He might have some brains but he was definitely thinking with some other part of his anatomy there
That's nice about your MIL. Mine is a poisonous cow who my kids don't want to see, I don't want to see, and my H doesn't want to see. That's what happens to you when you abandon your family and are a selfish narcissist all your life.
I want to hear all these funny stories from your OLD adventures, FS. A friend of mine is really putting on the pressure for me to join Hinge or something like that, and get out on a low commitment fun sort of date. I miss sex, but I don't feel ready in myself - I think I'm just as likely to burst into tears over a meal or turn into some weird bunny boiler as I am to have a nice, low pressure night out with a new friend. But I love hearing about your adventures.
Bum massage man - ugh! I mean, the technique must work for him sometime otherwise he wouldn't do it, but I cannot imagine any woman finding that enticing. I have a single friend who uses Tinder to arrange hookups for no-strings sex now and again. She's perfectly content with what she does, open with her partners, taking care of her health, etc. It isn't for me, I don't think, but fair play to her. And I know 100% that she would be entirely put off by an approach like that. She likes a man to make her laugh, and to be direct about what he wants without being crude. Bum massage!
The adventures are all on chat. They start normal and then after a few exchanges the weird comes out. A part of me thinks i should string them along just for the hillarity factor, but then i realise that i am wasting their time and setting expectations i cant meet. So, as politely as i can manage it, I say, Im not sure im the girl for you but good luck.
The 25 year old has been texting from his holiday. Its weird. My H, who has been on holidays multiple since he moved out barely contacts but someone ive spent less than 24 hours with checks in every day.
FS: does the 25 year old know you're still married? Human beings are truly odd, the new and novel is attractive and the old and mundane not so much. I suspect you're not really going to stay with a 25 year old for long though are you? Far too many landmines there!
Dilly - He asked if I was divorced and I told him no. We are waiting for the 2 years separated so we can go no fault (I don't actually know if this is true though)
So adventures ... (and this is for Alison)
Date no. 2 yesterday. Drink after work. Conversation was like pulling teeth and halfway through the second drink I was wondering if it would be rude to say "I have to go, early start tomorrow". He seemed so nice on chat. Funny, smart, cute. Turned out he couldn't hold a conversation and, though he had a nice enough face, was heroin chick skinny. When I asked what sort of things he was into he replied "I don't really do very much". So, whilst trying to work out how to escape, he says "you have a beautiful @rse" and then "I'd really like to lick it". Queue me going, thanks, I really have to go now.
Date no 3 tonight. Single dad, late 30's. Lovely but no chemistry (not that there was chemistry with date no 2, the @rse licker). We are going out again next week so will see if there are any sparks on the second date.
Date no 4 later tonight - he enticed me with "let's get a bottle of wine and make some bad decisions". This kind of appealed to me on a poetic level, but thinking of it now, and some of the 'offers' i've gotten, I suspect there may have been some hidden innuendo and am rethinking it all.
The 25 year old continues to text me every day. I still think it's a bit weird, but it is nice to have someone who checks in and wants to tell me what's happening with him. They aren't particularly 'sexual' texts, more "visited temple today" and then some photos, followed by "can't wait to see you", or "was thinking of you when I took this photo", followed by a pic of a beautiful sunset.
Absolutely not viable in the long term, but still nice that someone is thinking of me whilst looking at a beautiful sunset.
Please keep me updated. I might end up OLD myself one of these days and I need all the tips and experience you can share. They all sound like nutters. I haven't been on a date since I was 23 and it seemed a bit easier then. I don't drink at all and I imagine that's going to be a bit of a barrier to jumping into bed with someone for a bit of no-strings fun...
I know. It's hilarious. Maybe I'm just old fashioned and people are a bit more 'blunt' these days ...
I will say that the experience has been very good for my self esteem. Yes, some of them are "you are really hot" and I know deep down that they are playing the numbers game, but it is nice to hear anyway. Even the guy I saw earlier tonight who has been nothing but respectful sent a text after saying he had a really nice night, couldn't wait until next week and that it was refreshing to meet someone who was both attractive and intelligent. It makes a change from H who would rather choke then pay me a compliment and before he left said I was too skinny, too muscly and that I should really do something about the stretch marks (I've had two kids you [censored]hole).
I am glad that I waited so long to put myself out there. One thing I know is that I am not doing this because I am lonely. I have been alone long enough to know I am comfortable in my own space and that being with people, whether it be friends or a relationship is a choice and not born out of loneliness. I have the kids from tomorrow for a week and I will love spending time with them. Then next week I am seeing the 25 year old one night and the single dad another. I am also going out with friends one of the nights, and going to the gym when I can.
