It turns out that when you pain-shop that the store is always fully stocked.
I was updating some archives on the computer and came across my old "evidence" folder and foolishly browsed it. Yeah - still hurts. Not as bad as it used to but still hurts. I've now deleted that and the backup copy too. No need for that to hang around. Legally it doesn't matter and not morally either.
B and I had a nice dinner despite her voice being gone. Weird not kissing. She refused to pass on her germs even though I assured her that it would be "worth it". S24 joked later when he asked how my date was that as she's Italian that she could just use hand gestures. B thought that was funny when I passed it on today.
Our plans are to spend Saturday together and I was thinking that in addition to the usual errands that we would go to the local home show. She just messaged me that she's not any better and seemed to like the idea of soaking in my tub with lots of bubbles while I provide her with lemon tea. So it may be a quiet Saturday. Not sure if she'll take me up on that offer or not but it was (mostly) seriously offered. I do believe that I need to get some lemon tea.
I did hear from SIL1 that her husband / my oldest brother knew B's STBX in a "we work at the same place" kind of way. The opinion of SIL1 is that B is probably eligible for a very generous settlement. Which is good but also literally none of my business.
The reason for today's post though was a perhaps random encounter of the ex-wife kind. A lot of co-incidences seem to have coincided. While I was out with B I just left the garage doors open to let it air out a bit in the nice weather. It seems that S24 went out with her for some sort of dinner (he came home with a take-away box but no cheese I believe) and some new clothes. I did see my ex parked for a fair while across the street when she dropped him off and presumably noticed the then closed garage doors. I believe the odds are pretty close to zero now that she doesn't know that I'm dating. She may well know generally who and that it's getting quite serious.
One of the routes that I can take in to my Toronto office where I am today takes me past her apartment which I did. It was pretty obvious from the frost on her car that yep - she's still living alone in the same apartment she's been in for nearly 3 years now. Sad in many ways but also literally none of my business.
Even now, sometimes I feel like reaching out to her. To see if she's ok. But there's no purpose in that. Nothing to be gained and so very very much that could be lost.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
I know I have asked this before and it never seems to get a response, but why do you care what your XW knows and doesn't know? Y'all are separate now. Don't worry about her and what she does with your son. Just focus on you and B. I know you are detached and do not wish to go back but sometimes the way you word things make me wonder if you are fully detached. Or is it just more that you are a people pleaser so you care more intensely than most what people think? Either way, you are a lovely man and you have found a lovely companion in B, so just enjoy that and let the rest of the world roll on by.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
I know I have asked this before and it never seems to get a response
26 years is a long time to be wrapped up with one person. If you knew me back when this all started you'd be impressed by how far I've come. Still a work in progress and probably always will be.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
LOL...you know I just like to give you a hard time. I like your attitude, though...a work in progress. Aren't we all, my dear Andrew? Aren't we all? I know I always will be.
Me 52, H53 Bomb drop 9/29/2014 Divorce from XH final 12/17/2014 Marriage #2 12/31/2019 5 adult (step)daughters (3 from XH's first marriage, 2 from current H's previous relationships) 6 grandkids
I do think we all secretly would love to hear that the WAS is jealous. She probably is, Andrew, or at least she's wondering where her Plan B has gone. They usually like to think of us waiting patiently on a shelf somewhere.
This was my situation. WAS had exit affair, didnt last 3 months. Then she seen 1 of the women I was dating/talking to....she even texted me that she was a little jealous. She was p!ssed when I told her that it was a former employee I may have flirted with a little when W was becoming distant in the M (due to "boyfriend"). I tell you it felt great lol. but it didnt last with that one, to young and to much drama
Last edited by job; 04/26/1912:29 PM. Reason: edited a word
A - Amen......I was with my XW for 17 years and there will always be a part of me that will always love her. Even though I know our time together is over with she is the mother of my children and no matter what happened I will always watch out for her best interests.
I hope our mutual family friends told my XW that I am dating and I also hope she is secretly jealous
LOL - We'll see what this weekend brings. B hates using the laundromat at her apartment and I've made the offer. The house is set up to do laundry for 4 and S24 doesn't do his very often.
If you look carefully between the houses the clothes lines are pretty visible.
More seriously though - I don't expect any blow-back from my relationship with B from my ex regardless on how she may be feeling which is literally none of my business. I expect that if she were to complain to any mutual acquaintances or even the kids that she'd just get a blank stare from them as well.
On BD H52, W50 T27, M26 S21, D23 BD-9-Mar-16 D-15-Jan-18 Final-19-Apr-18 I am a storyteller. The story may do you no good. But a story is never for the listener. It is always for the one who tells
