Thanks all for the support and advice I really appreciate it. Yesterday, I took the kids to school whilst a relative stayed at my home. Whilst I was gone W was caught entering the house. W lied saying that she urgently needed to talk to me about legal stuff. It was obviously BS she made up because she'd been caught and didn't expect anyone to be in the house because she knew I'd be out with the kids at that time. She left right away. I've thought for a while that she might have been bugging the house, knew my legal correspondence etc. in advance. It got so bad that I had to take calls in the garden. Now I realise that she's been coming into the house when she knows I'm not there and would have seen documents etc.
I feel sad that the mother of my kids is sinking so low and she's telling lots of outrageous lies in her statement for the next custody court date making me out to be a bad person, yet just about everyone believes her because she appears to be nice.
I've heard that it is going to be recommended to the court that the kids live mostly with their mum. I've been a SAHD for years, live in the family home, short walk to the school and yet I'm set to lose the kids and therefore our home too.
What does your lawyer say? I don't know anything about the law across the pond, but I would talk to your lawyer. I think being a SAHD may work in your favor.
H(37) W(35) D8, D5, S3 T20, M13 BD 8/31/18 EA Discovered 9/13/18 Mediation 10/3/18 W files for D 10/12/18 W moves out 11/10/18 EA confirmed 12/25/18 D Final 1/10/19
There's an organisation that does a report to advise the judge who the kids should live with. It is very rare for a judge to go against their report. The person doing the report is to recommend the kids live mostly with their mother despite the fact that she will require childcare and I wouldn't etc. etc.
Waiting to hear from L but not much they can say or do as judges normally follow the advice in the report.
The person writing the report had interviewed WW first. I could tell she had already made up her mind and believes WW, she pulled a face doubting me and interrupted every key point.
I saw WW at a school play a few days ago. We spoke at the end and she told about 6 lies in 30 seconds. I had hoped WW would have mellowed by now (6 months since she left) but it's relentless. She's acting like she's a victim but she's a liar. I'm being done over on the kids and money, nobody wants to hear the truth that WW is telling lies.
The kids are back with me. W looked very happy at the change-over but couldn't look at me. She will know it's going to be recommended the kids live mostly with her and she had a new car. It seems she's a WAW/WW and MLC.
Kids say they have heard they are going to be staying with me for christmas as the person writing the report has lots of other cases. I hope that it's true. I guess the longer the delay the greater the chance of the current routine of 50/50 being continued.
A couple of week ago I did a 180 and I sent a message to W on eldests birthday with a pic of their 1st birthday. I put Today is to celebrate ******* birth. I was there at your side throughout holding your hand and supporting you as our baby entered the world. It was the birth of our family. We shared the special moment. That is what life is about. I hope that you get the time and space to figure it out before too long as every moment is precious and those moments are being lost. Forgiveness is a decision. I want to do the right thing, do you?
I got back a message back saying it was a wonderful miracle day and that she was 'truly completely utterly grateful for that'.
... but she's since bought a new car and the kids say she was going to put it in her parents name (obviously W and her parents planning for a future divorce). A couple of days ago at a kids change-over W gave me a couple of old photos that I'd not seen before that I was on, not her and said she thought I'd like them.
6 months of separation and suddenly I feel like I've hit a wall because I miss passion, affection and love. I feel sad that W has gone so low being dishonest in the things she has done; sad for her and the kids. I wonder how much longer I can wait hoping that she will realise what she's done wrong.
I feel like calling her out saying that she has been deceptive for years and my gut feeling that she wasn't committed was right. Any advice?
